3 Dudes Wearing Plaid

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn how NASA should actually be doing their rocket launches, what not to call a Billy Joel fan, and why elephants brush their teeth with hot toothpaste.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn whether conservation of energy is real, how Gus cooks dinner every night, and what the hell Hermes has to do with vacuums and copper spheres.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn which advertising stunt finally contains a restroom, how likely sabotage is, and whether the Dudes have been secretly planning these episodes ahead of time.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn which occupation requires in-home pits, what they wear in Spokane, and why you should go out and buy, among other things, an entire pig’s head.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they complete their single-elimination bracket, make some very petty judgements, set themselves up for some very tough decisions, and ultimately learn, once and for all, who’s the hottest president.

A couple disclaimers on this episode: first, we highly recommend that you follow along by looking up photos of these guys yourself. We explain our criteria in the show. Second, in order to determine the hotness of each president, we go into some depth on which facial features we find attractive and which we don’t. Feel free to skip this one if you don’t want to hear that. Know that our opinions are totally subjective, and any face looks much, much hotter on someone who hasn’t committed war crimes.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they begin a bracket-style single elimination tournament of goofs and extremely petty judgement to learn, once and for all, who’s the hottest president.

A couple disclaimers on this episode: first, we highly recommend that you follow along by looking up photos of these guys yourself. We explain our criteria in the show. Second, in order to determine the hotness of each president, we go into some depth on which facial features we find attractive and which we don’t. Feel free to skip this one (and the next one!) if you don’t want to hear that. Know that our opinions are totally subjective, and any face looks much, much hotter on someone who hasn’t committed war crimes.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what a surrealist street gang is, how to pronounce “Guggi,” and whether Mitchell will be making a statement about Ireland on the podcast.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn why fifteen-year-olds are screwed, how a competition show that ran for sixty-four years can have sixty-seven winners, and what’s wrong with Evan’s meat flesh.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn which President had the best ghost attitude, what architectural style scares Californians, and why Mitchell won’t stop calling people “FRAUDS!”

Also, a quick heads-up: we’ll all be traveling, so we’re off next week, but we’ll return with a normal episode on September 17.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what UChicago students do for fun, how a fancy French party caused multiple swan attacks, and why people celebrate the birthday of a can of beans.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn who invented the first SCIENCE TANK, what you can use a SCIENCE TANK for, and how much the first SCIENCE TANK sold for on Craigslist.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn which classic 3DWP segment is finally getting its own jingle, where Wizard Island is located, and whether Gus or Evan is right in the Great Spectacle Pond Debate.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what you can use scorpion venom for, whose rear end nobody wants to lick, and why the United Parcel Service wants you to buy dry ice.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what it sounds like when Mitchell and Gus record in the same room (spoiler alert: it sounds kinda bad), what the new name of the podcast is, and how you pronounce “incarnated.”

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn who this episode is dedicated to, which toothpaste has its very own community of sentient tubes, and exactly how many koalas have chlamydia.

(Also, sorry in advance about the very weird clicking in Evan’s audio around the 20 minute mark - I tried very hard to remove it but this is about as good as it gets.)

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what ABBA wrote a musical about, which Wikipedia page broke Gus’ brain (again), and when you’re allowed to kiss your opponent on the mouth.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn where the beans come from, who’s mad about semantic drift, and where you can go to get a suit and a live Beatles concert in one stop.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what (if anything) the hippocampus doesn’t do, how to speak word salad, and which STD fact you need to inspire an entire generation of abstinence-only sex ed.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn where Mitchell has heard of Emile Berliner before, what materials you definitely shouldn’t make music out of, and which Dude’s statements are gonna get us sued in seventy years by space alien rights activists.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn whether England is real (spoiler alert: it’s not), why you can either kick or drink someone’s Aristotle, and how London used some extremely silly ATMs to protest the Olympics.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what Mitchell’s very cool and very real shirt says, why Willem Dafoe needs the DNA, and which candy baby marsupials look like while they’re still in the pouch.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what all the lapsed Catholics have been up to, who has the longest and most French name in 3DWP history, and what Gus really means when they say they “study the humanities.”

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what the hell they’re gathering, which brand has crossed over with both Dungeons and Dragons and My Little Pony, and how Gus’ mind was finally broken, H. P. Lovecraft-style, by a Wikipedia page.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn how Mitchell is using their first genie wish, which new ride-sharing service is going to take the world by storm, and who Zac is (and why he needs no introduction).

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what it is with Etsy stores and sentient pants, how Gus was diagnosed with chupacabra, and why you didn’t know that Napoleon had an older brother.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what the Earth’s loop-de-doos are called, who wrote a Grammy-nominated song about geology, and how a chocolate layer cake kicked off a scientific revolution.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn why pirates had union representatives, which gender-neutral title would make Gus sound like a springer spaniel, and whose fault it is that the Ever Given got stuck sideways in the Suez Canal.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn how to get free junkyard cats, what a finger cot is, and why Gus probably won’t be getting arrested anytime soon. Unless you’re the IRS, in which case, maybe don’t join us this week.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn which college is keeping a literal corpse in their student center, why the Guggenheim could double as a prison, and what “antejentacular circumgyration” is.

(Also, a warning: this whole episode contains repeated, kind of gross descriptions of a poorly-preserved dead body. If you don’t want to hear about that, definitely skip this one.)

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what the Department of Transportation’s silliest standard unit is, whether big shoes solve everything, and why their listeners should become the transgender clown video essayists they wish to see in the world.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid for a very special 25th episode as they finally fulfill one of the promises of their theme song. It’s time to learn some sick Care Bear lore.

(One note: we recorded this episode a few months ago, and the Wikipedia pages involved have actually been edited since then! We’ve tried to give you as many links as we can that contain roughly the same information as that mentioned in the podcast. Enjoy the show!)

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what caused the “complications” that killed Sylvester Graham, when Americans developed a collective fear of starch, and why sliced bread is the best thing since Betty White.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn where Evan’s green screen is, which Disney movie is actually a combination of three different ideas and some spare Aristocats, and who’s capable of sword-fighting for an entire hour.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they celebrate Gus' 21st birthday with a very alcoholic episode, and also as they learn who Mitchell turns into on the full moon, how not to pronounce hors d’oeuvres, and what you can use - and where you can use it - to get a horse to perk up its tail.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn how Evan’s going to give Mitchell nightmares tonight, what a ‘vowel-like sound’ sounds like, and which Dartmouth professor the Dudes are stanning this week.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what the hell a safety coffin is, whether safety coffins were actually effective, and whose fault it is that people in the nineteenth century were so obsessed with safety coffins.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what the hell a safety coffin is, whether safety coffins were actually effective, and whose fault it is that people in the nineteenth century were so obsessed with safety coffins.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn how much of English is ‘e,’ what Mitchell wants out of his tongue-twisters, and who Li’l Rob is (and why we should probably be thanking him).

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what’s totally, definitely, 100% going to happen in February 2021, how many things are named after Isaac Asimov, and why, according to a recent poll, Donald Trump.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn why Gus is self-conscious about summertime frolicking, what the most improbable yet useful speed-skating strategy is, and who’s using 110,000 condoms.

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what noise falling leaves make in Mitchell’s imaginary indie horror game, how Linnaeus messed up some nomenclature, and why you shouldn’t mainline any stinky seeds you happen to encounter.

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn why it’s funny to run Doom on your smart fridge, who has the best name in the history of 3DWP, and what a fishcock is (but whatever you’re thinking, we promise, it’s not that).

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what the true meaning of shrimp scampi is, why you don’t technically need a name in the United States, and which of Mitchell and Evan’s views Gus feels compelled to walk back for the good of the podcast.

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn why Gus sounds much better than Mitchell, whether the Three Dudes would love their corpse son (if they had one), and how not to pronounce ‘boatswain.’

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn what keeps Mitchell up at night, how struggling writers can get ahead in this depressing gig economy, and why Gus is receiving secret messages from their teeth.

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn which saint is in charge of epilepsy, bees, and Lesbians, whether there’s any good way to send someone mustache hairs, and how much they love each other.

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn whether Evan is lying about his gingham shirt, why it’s important to get brand-name Christianity, and what Barry Manilow was up to in the seventies. It’s a wild one, folks. Please don’t sue us.

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn which words are the naughty words, what killed the Protestant work ethic, and why a hacker would want to steal 23 million children’s virtual pets.

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn how Gus managed to claim the title of Mr. Worldwide, who the most popular person born in 1858 is, and which book made a lot of Cognitive Science students yell at Mitchell.

Content Warning: mentions of suicide at 13:05-13:48. Feel free to skip; you won't miss much.

Correction: The Freud footnote Gus mentioned is in Civilization and its Discontents, not the Uncanny.

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below:

Join the Three Dudes Wearing Plaid as they learn who or what Gus flashed today, which off-Broadway musical traps its characters in an endless time loop of murder, and why Mitchell’s feeling so darn spooked.

...But probably don’t join us until you’ve watched Clue: The Movie. We’re not saying you won’t enjoy this episode otherwise, only that it’ll probably be a lot more fun once you’ve seen the movie. It’s free with Amazon Prime. Trust us, you probably won’t regret it.

Our theme music is by Evan Schafer, and the show is edited by Gus Guszkowski. If you have questions or comments about anything we talked about on the show, feel free to email us at 3dudeswearingplaid@gmail.com, and follow us on Instagram @3dwpcast!

All the links for this episode can be found below: