Ride with Nbs Malay

Should you accept your placement in someone’s life when it ends in a way that you do not agree with? Is it right to control someone’s lifestyle with your expectations? What do you consider a friend? This episode is about releasing the blame from yourself on the relationships you may be manipulated into keeping. Everything does not need to be explained (in my opinion, of course). Be a good person but don’t exhaust yourself into being more than what your soul can offer. Take space for you and let people be them. Don’t let it break you. Don’t let what they think of you, bring out the dark side of you. You’re better than that (in my opinion, of course).

He might be your friend. I don’t care. He might be your brother. I don’t care. He might be your grandson. I don’t care. He might be your cousin. I DON’T CARE! Be aware of the people you love and let them know that it is not okay to hurt anybody. Especially someone you planned to have a future with. I don’t care who is listening. I don’t care who doesn’t believe me. I don’t care if you’re mad that I am speaking out because I CARE about myself and I care about others who can learn from this. No silence!!! Cause nobody will know. No silence!!! If you’re ready to grow from all the hurt and pain this caused you. No silence!!!! Because your story matters, my story matters and how we made it out is important! Be encouraged, be courageous, be strong, be healthy and be free. Much love and peace to you.

https://www.breakthecycle.org/blog/it’s-national-domestic-violence-awareness-month

Hey!!! Do you ever look at yourself and see how a person changed you? Whether it’s for better or for worse? Do you ask yourself if you’re anything like them after dealing with them for so long? Is it possible that you are developing the traits of a narcissistic individual?

Not too personal! Ouch! But I wanna express something that I feel is very important to society today... TALK to your kids... you 𝘢𝘳𝘦 their parents, yes, BUT you were ALSO their first “friend” 🥰. Don’t step around my triggers cause I’m using them to bounce back in every way that I can!!!

I mean... expect what you accept, right? Wrong. Well... in my opinion. Should we love with no limits? Is it healthy for us to say, “I love you. If you need me, I’m here, but 𝘚𝘈𝘠𝘖𝘕𝘈𝘙𝘈”? Can you be friends with someone you once loved? Like true, true friendship without the sex? Idk but press play to hear my opinion about it. 😭❤️🙏🏾

If you guys didn’t see the movie... 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵! I loved every second of it... but do not play this episode if you don’t want the spoiler alert!!!!

It’s not what you think it is... It’s just another conversation about being human.

I feel like most of the world has tried to 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 someone just to get over someone else. But what if the someone finds 𝘺𝘰𝘶? Are they still considered a “rebound”? Come sit in my brain for a sec 🙃.

Crazy how a blackbird has all the space in the sky and their most common cause of death are cars... and cats. Did you hear them singing at the end of January? Or maybe you heard a crow 🥴 😂... tune in... I got some new views. ❤️

Yeah... it’s time to end that... it’s just too much to deal with. I want to talk about the things that matter. Let’s reset...

Hey... guess what the Mayor’s office asked me to do 😊? You have to listen to find out ❤️!!! Listen... I’m starting to think I have to pick a lane... do I want to be a singer, author, motivational speaker, host...? Should I put some things on the back burner to focus on the most important? Or do I just keep pushing it all? Such a tough decision! Listen to how I feel about this... give me some feedback? 😳

Wow! Can’t believe this happened 😂 buuut on the bright side we had a good time. Let’s talk about freely posting on social media... can we say our goals without anyone having a problem with it ? 🤔

This experience was just—WOW! I can’t even begin to explain what this felt like... but I will try. Lol. This was completely unbelievable! I know everybody said I deserved this but—SO MANY PEOPLE DESERVED THIS. I just can’t believe it was me. This felt so good! I am so thankful. Thank you Althea and Lakeisha! 💕

The show still went on! My friends held it down! I heard nothing but great things! I want to talk about the importance in taking a break from the things you love to prevent yourself from numbing your pain. I know sometimes it’s best to keep that distraction, for your own sake! But I have learned that it can be just as damaging as completely ignoring your problems all together. I ran from it before... I can’t even lie. I learned that is not the way and I am still learning how to heal. Healing starts with addressing the problem for what it is. I’ve had friends help me come to that conclusion and I know I will be at my very best as soon as I let all of this suffering go. Thanks for listening.

I went to a retreat called, “The Pink Party” hosted by @gurltheretreat ! I know my purpose is to speak my pain to you to help us all heal together. I learned at the retreat that I must execute that plan and continue being BRAVE by being VULNERABLE. At first, I thought I was releasing too much, but the truth is... I’ve been silent for too long and I don’t care about how any other soul feels about it!!! “Freedom of speech” isn’t taken advantage of enough! I have the right to say what I want, post what I want and FEEL how I want, UNAPOLOGETICALLY! I decided that I’m the type of hero that will help save herself by not being afraid. I’ve always hated feeling limited to what I talk about because I have too much to say. Now, I know my specialty... I know what I have to do. Ride with me to tour the experience of what it looks like to come from being broken and confused, to learning how to be here for myself. It is an intense process... but I think it’s going to be worth it. #VoicesHavePower

As you know, life is not easy. Most of the time your friends can’t help you and other times you may feel like people don’t care enough. Well, that’s how I’ve felt. But I do care about myself enough to get the healing I deserve after so much hurt and pain in my life. I know I’m not the only one going through this, so I don’t mind sharing my process. I believe one day... my happiness will be genuine and no one’s going to steal that power from me, again. Regardless of how I feel about myself right now, I AM a triumphant woman and I am worthy of existing for myself. Thanks for listening and I’ll see you next year. Peace.

Talk about a “fuck boi”... eh—that’s not very nice, Malay. That’s actually shady af. Nah. Real shyt... there was pros and cons to it. I guess you’ll have to listen to find out. This is the first time people sent in questions for me to answer. So, that means people care about what I have to say! I can’t apologize for this episode being so long... it’s worth it!!!! Peace.

It’s always good for people to see things from a different perspective. Judge people all you want, as you should, but give them a chance to explain who they are. It’s not that we have to explain, but we choose to give you our reason. Do you know what a renoB is?

Where do we go from here? When do we put an end to our own pain? When is it okay to lean on somebody else? Is it possible to love and not lose? Don’t pity the single folks... we can be in a relationship if we wanted to. But I refuse to be in a relationship that isn’t worth it. I want someone to think about me all the time and call me. Text me good mornings and goodnights. I don’t want to be kicked down on social media because you don’t understand me. I don’t want to be misused or misunderstood... I want to be loved. I deserve love. I deserve peace.

Do you think a person can love more than one person? I’m not saying you can justify it, I’m just looking at views. If you were to agree with someone’s side to it, how would you feel? What would you say? Can you ever see yourself in a polygamous relationship if you benefitted the most?

Going through a lot, I guess. Venting about it and reading articles helps me. It sucks to be in a mood and feel like you can’t switch it. Who helps you through it? A lover? A friend? A therapist? Everybody needs somebody or something. I have pen and paper— pretty much all I need. But, I’ve got to release. I need my friends! My creatives! We gotta help each other through it. If I ever said I would be there for someone, I’m there till the day I die. No broken promises.

Do we ever talk about the journey through co-parenting? 🤔 Let me just share a little personal story with you. It took forever to feel this comfortable and it took forever to understand that I am not his only “‘mother” figure. How does it make you feel?

We came from talking about kids needing father figures in their life to some unspeakable thangs lol. No... you really have to listen in. It’s always fun talking with Eb and Nugget! 🤗

Eh—Don’t you just hate talking about this? Losing people in your life. Like... for what? Why does it have to be that way? But people come and go... all the time... it’s life. We’re human! Our job is to just BE THERE, I guess.

Sometimes we don’t know how to ask for help. Sometimes we want to keep our business to ourselves. Most times we’re sure people won’t understand. Other times we don’t give people a chance to listen. We are what we eat. We are what we tell ourselves we are. If you believe you’re a failure... you ARE. If you believe you’re a winner... you ARE.

We are going to have so much fun tonight! We are going to enjoy so much talent tonight! And we are going to create so much peace tonight! Make sure you come out and don’t miss the vibes!

Fun with Friends

So many people feel they know it all. They feel like they can just glance at a person and they know their entire life. You don’t know anything about a person because of photos, social media and the things people say about them. And you have no right to tell a person how they should be either. We accept people for who they are and the better person they will become in life. It starts there.

Play games and end up talking bout threesomes lol so unexpected! Hahaha

Just friends and me up at almost 3 am still drinking and chilling !!! Fun and the best conversation!

Sometimes we feel discouraged—but that’s okay. That’s what we have each other for! I will lift you because I know you would do it for me. There is no time for discouragement!

Everything happens for a reason, right? Wrong! Well, I’m my opinion... but let’s talk about it... let’s talking about losing love that wasn’t meant to be lost. Let’s talk about avoiding regrets and let’s talk about forgiveness and how to become better... Thanks for listening.

I often wonder why people hate their skin color. I created this piece(peace) to remind us of what our skin tone means—how people would love to be a different tone while you are hating it. People are bleaching their skin to be lighter while others are burning their skin to be darker. Why can’t we just be happy with how we were made? You don’t get to choose your skin tone because then you lose a part of you. What’s the point? Learn to love yourself—the way you are. I mixed in Nina Simone’s “Black Bird” because when I think of loving my beautiful black, I think of that song. She talked about all the pain this “Black Bird” went through and “don’t you wanna Fly” basically means to me... aren’t you sick of where you are? Aren’t you tired of all the pain and sorrow? Soar! Be yourself! Be you! Be free! So incorporating it into my peace (I know how to spell but you know what I mean)it means to stop being who you are not. Love yourself and be free. Love your skin. Thanks for your time.

Great open mic turn out... it’s always good to release negative emotions to develop positive ones. Make room for love! Make room for peace and strength! We can build and be free. Talk to others to stop painful emotions or let it go at an open mic.

We’ve all worked super hard on something and didn’t get what we expected at least once in our lives. But if we stopped there, then what? Sure, we have each other. But what good is that if we aren’t confident within ourselves.