Coffee in the Corral
By Abigail
A window into my journey of learning to be authentic and live my life wholeheartedly and unapologetically. I do not have all the answers but I do know that it's important for us to know that we are not alone. Life is unpredictable and messy, but it is also a beautiful opportunity for us to "seize the day" and stop believing all the lies that we have been told.
I hope that through my story, and the stories of the super cool guests that come onto my show, people will be empowered to build the life that they want.
It's raw and it's real.
Coffee in the Corral Feb 07, 2024
“Moving On” song #95
Today is the last episode I recorded at our farm LOL! Haven.
It’s a quick podcast today since I still have loads of packing
to do. 🙃
I wrote this song back in January.
I could feel it in my body.
I knew it was time.
Today I share my song as a way of saying goodbye to this
season and welcoming our next adventure.
Never get stuck.
Listen to your gut.
Stay wild!
I Have No Fucking Clue What I'm Doing - #94
Are you smack dab in the middle of the stage where your kids are growing up and starting to take wing?
If so, this episode may be for you. I don't have the answers but I do understand the struggle.
Raising kids is no walk in the park. It's more like climbing Mt. Everest, except you have absolutely no training.
It can be so hard on our hearts.
Today I share the messy middle.
My current struggles with it all.
The unrelenting mom guilt.
How do I balance empowering with no expectations?
I don't know - but damn I love my kids.
I hope you find some comfort in knowing that it's all just a wild experiment we take when we become parents and there is no one "right" way to do it.
“From Prey to Predator” #93
With only two weeks left till we move, I begin this episode with gratitude for this special place we have called LOL! Haven, for the last 5 years.
After 19 years, I have finally figured out how I want to spend every Mother’s Day.
Some people will not be friends for life and I have never really liked this fact. It is difficult to not take it personally when someone really likes you for years but suddenly finds you a threat when you take your freedom.
Remembering my past is helping me have compassion and understanding for these people instead of hurt and frustration.
Release others to be where they are. Everyone gets to choose.
Use your energy for your life!
“You Should Be Glad That You’re Not Perfect!” (for real😘) #92
Update on our crazy last week and some slight lamenting on how I do not want to live a life where “crazy” is my normal. 🤪
Negative words/phrases I detest and would like to permanently remove from our language…such as
“I’m not perfect”
“Humans are flawed”
“Trial and Error”
“Mistakes and Failures”
I discuss how we love variation and it’s ridiculous to even think that our goal should be attaining some rigid structure.
Perfection should not be our goal - Growth should be our goal!
What if our flaws were not flaws at all…
I believe that life is all about learning, not about succeeding to one specific goal.
What might happen if we remove the negative messages in our culture and start replacing them with the idea that it’s all a part of the life learning process? Might we become less afraid and more curious???
"Is it possible that there are no bad parts in me?" #91
Today I share about some of my recent struggles to understand myself and how I am learning to ask myself questions. Learning to figure out what I need and then make it priority to get my needs met is a new experience for me that's gonna take a lot of practice. ;)
Here is the book I am reading right now:
"You Are the One You've Been Waiting For" by Richard C. Schwartz, PhD
I highly recommend this book!
Dr. Schwartz also has another book that I want to read called "No Bad Parts".
At the end of this episode I share my most recent song that I wrote that was inspired by the book I am reading. The horses came over while I was singing. It was some cool moments. Make sure you watch the end of this video to see the beautiful shared connections.
“Truple Conversation!” #90
“Truple Conversation!” #90
Today I finally was able to coordinate a time that my partners could record an episode out in my corral with me!
We chat about:
Our upcoming move and recent news on the house we want
Why Jenna is so excited about it
Learning to rewire the way we think about life
Why I struggle with believing in myself
How our growth causes some others to be uncomfortable
The ingrained religious bullshit that is hard to undo
Nate’s thoughts on why he doesn’t see a need to attach meaning to everything that happens in life
The animals were very interactive at the beginning of this episode, including our adopted, free-range goat that tried to sample Nate’s coffee. LOL!
Here is the link to listen to my interview with Christine Baird!
https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/abigail980/episodes/Video--Interview-with-Christine-Baird---Entrepreneur--Childrens-Author--Early-Childcare-Advocate-e27te41
Have a listen! I think you will enjoy this fun conversation with my two incredible partners, Jennifer and Nate!
The Flu - The Update - and The Book That Blew My Mind Episode #89
Finally back in the corral this week but still struggling to recover from one of the worst flu’s our family has ever gotten.
This week I discuss:
The flu I have unaffectionately named “the devil”
The stress of putting our house on the market and constantly having it ready to show while also battling fevers raging in our family
Finally getting an awesome offer on our house
The arduous, exhausting task of searching for a new home
Struggling to believe that there is another wonderful home just waiting for my family
Learning to let go of what I have now so I can receive the next new thing
The book I am reading now that is blowing my mind. You just need to get it and read it. It’s called, “The Jesus Mysteries - Was the “Original Jesus” a Pagan God?” by Timothy Freke and Peter Gandy
“TRAGIC NEWS” - #88
Nothing can prepare you for tragedy.
It is unpredictable, unstoppable, and disastrous.
It knocks us off our feet.
Stops us in our tracks.
Forces us to face the naked truth that life is fragile and temporary.
Allison Short will walk us through this conversation today.
If you have not heard the interview with this incredible woman, go back to episode #79 “A Life of Adventure!” and listen to her story. You can click on the link below:
This episode is vital. Life is precious. Let love be your guide.
“My Brain is Better Than a Squirrel’s but My Resources Are Not” (the messy middle of selling and buying a house - #87)
“No story is good without a struggle to triumph over.”
Well, if that’s the case, then my story is getting better by the second. 🤣
Join me today as I hide in my barn from the treacherous winds outside and talk about our recent challenges of getting our house on the market and beginning the search for a new home.
Sometimes life is just the messy middle and the only thing we can do it continue showing up and believing the Universe will provide us with what we need.
It’s scary - as hell.
It’s frustrating.
It’s exhausting.
And it’s all part of this wild adventure we are on.
Join me as I process it all in real-time in hopes that it can encourage others who are in the middle of the struggle.
I got ya.
We got this.
"Onto the Next Adventure!" - a throuple chat about our upcoming move!
This week my partners, Nate and Jennifer, join me to talk about some big changes in the making. Moving is one of the scariest things we do as humans but it can also be one of the best things for you if you are trying to rebuild your life.
We discuss:
- why each of us felt it was time to move
- what is the thing we are most excited about and what part of it is hardest for us
- I share the story of how Shiloh spoke to me and helped me see that it was time to move on
Old ponies-Wild horses-and Two tired and goofy ladies
This week I enjoyed a lovely, laid-back check-in with my beautiful Jennifer!
We discuss:
- Jennifer's struggles with managing anxiety and learning to live life in a way that feels good to her instead of carrying everyone else's baggage.
- My recent "trailer loading" story that ended in a bit of a disaster and had me discouraged. Jenna helps me process it a little bit which helped me not spiral into utter frustration.
- We talk about why we love nonmonogamy, especially when it comes to running the household and not having to do it alone.
I think you will enjoy this conversation that is filled with laughter and even a hysterical story of when I compared Jennifer to our old pony which did not at all come out how I was hoping it would. ;)
“Adding Spice To Life - One Brave Step at a Time” #84
An inspiring conversation with my 15-year-old as she navigates public school for the first time
Ever feel scared to death but you really want to do something?
Tanaya joins me today to share some of her experiences of high school and how she is learning to make her way in an area that is completely foreign to her.
Tanaya discusses:
How she first felt going to public school
Her determination to keep looking for a connection until she found it
How being brave helps her to add spice to what could be a very boring, dull school experience
How Tanaya showed up all the boys in a pull-up competition
You can’t assume someone isn’t worth becoming friends with just because they look disinterested on the outside
Sometimes you just have to bulldoze to claim your space
Tanaya’s advice to high schoolers (which is great advice for ANYONE!)
“Why Should We Keep Playing?” #83 - a playful conversation with my 11-year-old
Today my youngest daughter joins me to talk about how she uses her imagination in her daily life to help bring fun to boring or challenging tasks.
We also discuss the recent “Revel”ution Campfire” event that we hosted and how I am starting a new movement that refuses to live stressed and unhappy by choosing playfulness over productivity. :)
We wrap this episode up with an impromptu game to tell each other an audiobook. We take turns and make up the story as we go and it involves lots of silliness and laughter - two of the things that we ALL could use a whole lot more of. ;)
Check out the book that I mention called “Play” by Dr. Stuart Brown!
“Just Do It” - an Interview with Eden Holt-Ball #82
Oh my goodness. Today I was honored to have a very meaningful conversation with my dear friend, Eden Holt. She joined me in my corral to share her life story and how her experiences have shaped where she is today.
Eden doesn’t have an easy story. She shares with us how she grew up in the foster care system and the difficult challenges it created for her as an adult. Her healing journey is not complete, (none of us will be until we die), but it’s evident that Eden has done the work and she continues to do the work to keep walking towards deeper healing.
Eden has learned to embrace herself, rewrite her story, and build a life where she feels fulfilled. As a life coach with her own business now, she helps others achieve their goals by first digging in deep to help them work their way to healing, then they can begin to set goals and achieve their dreams.
The honesty and vulnerability that Eden so graciously embodies immediately gives space for listeners to “just be human”. This conversation even helped me rewire areas I felt stuck in my brain which allowed me to see things in a new light. It was incredibly refreshing and enlightening!
This woman is amazing, full of life and light, and she has beautiful, compassionate, wisdom that each of us can benefit from.
Go learn more about her and follow her at:
Website:
www.connectioneffect.com (this website is currently under construction for an update)
FaceBook:
@theconnectioneffect
Instagram:
@connection_effect
Contact Eden Holt-Ball:
417-597-3581
-The 5 Magic Questions- #81
Today is a FFT - “fucking first time” to do a podcast episode while it’s snowing. ❄️ 😊
Amidst a heavy snowfall and in between Zelle’s frequent interruptions, I share my blog entry from this week. I have recently been listening to Martha Beck and it is challenging me to look at how I go through my life. This blog talks about my thoughts and ponderings about humans and happiness and how I can not be so stressed out. 🤪
You can visit biketotype.com to read it for yourself if you would like!
I have been trying to learn how to live “IN” my life instead of “through” my life.
There are 5 questions you can ask yourself at any moment that help ground you and also remind you that feeling good doesn’t have to cost us a lot of money. Listen and participate in the 5 questions I ask today!
Gifting ourselves with things that make us happy doesn’t have to be complicated. Stay to the end of the episode to hear my campfire story!
Favorite podcast links that I am listening to right now:
Good Life Project - with Jonathan Fields and Leo Babautahttps://open.spotify.com/episode/0SalM45FtOQbnp1eHqYLcO?si=DM6OvCbZR4aTTlZvwnDrLA
BEWILDERED - With Martha Beck and Rowan Mangan
https://open.spotify.com/episode/0NYWmSA2Zdl7urbcD3Mlr2?si=MGh5ur50Qx6dXG04GGw30g
“Healing is Complicated”... and why it feels frustrating. #80
Today I share my recent experience of how being interviewed on TV helped me see some progress in my healing journey.
Then I read an article on how our physical bodies heal.
https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/treatment-tests-and-therapies/how-wounds-heal
I share how learning these facts enlightened me to have compassion for my own healing journey.
These are my takeaways:
You must have all the right components to start the process (enough blood)
It takes a very specific balance of all the different factors for us to heal correctly (not too much or too little oxygen)
It doesn’t look pretty (scabby, oozing fluids, inflammation, etc.)
Trauma doesn’t heal and disappear (scars)
It can be fucking uncomfortable (stretching, itching, puckering of the wound…)
It takes a long time (story of my hand injury -torn ligament)
Other life issues/experiences/things out of our control can interrupt the healing process
If we are in circumstances that compromise our well-being, it can feel impossible to heal because our bodies are already in survival mode (chronic wounds).
It’s important to reach out when things do not seem to be getting better. Sometimes we can care for our own wounds but there are times that it’s really important to get professional help.
Each step, every day is a success worth celebrating.
Healing doesn’t feel very healing but I promise you it’s worth it.
“A Life of Adventure!” #79 -Stories from hiking extraordinaire Allison Short-
This week I finally got to talk with my new, amazing friend, Allison Short! It was an absolute delight chatting with her and hearing about some of the things she has learned through her many adventures. Allison shares with us:
The details of her accomplishments in obtaining the Triple Crown of Hiking
Some of the important lessons hiking has taught her
How dangerous situations have taught her a deeper gratitude for life
How her creative/explorative childhood sparked a love for adventure
The next adventure she is planning to embark on this summer
How there is no “one way” to hike or how to live your life
Her advice to “Not let time slip by”
You will love this episode. I promise. This woman is creative, positive, fun-loving, and full of adventurous spirit!!
Want to see what next adventure Allison is up to?
Follow Allison on Instagram @ayfosho
“You Can’t Escape The Zoo Overnight” - Podcast #78
Today was my record for the coldest podcast yet!
It was 2 degrees outside with a wind chill of -10. 😱
Good thing I love extreme challenges!
Join me in my barn, in front of my little propane heater while I discuss some of the recent struggles that I am working on.
Why is it so HARD for me to tell people to call me my name?
One of my biggest annoyances is not understanding my feelings
One of the regular practices of the cult to help people “work things out” which traumatized me
Struggling to be my own person and not feel guilty for having different needs than my partners
Why and what I will be “escaping” the rest of my life
My heroes on nature documentaries and how they inspire me
Why freedom is worth pursuing
The letter Elizabeth Gilbert inspired me to write - #77
Today I read a letter that I wrote to myself. I was inspired by Glennon Doyle’s “We Can Do Hard Things” recent interview with Elizabeth Gilbert. I highly recommend listening to that interview before listening to my podcast today. It will help it all make more sense, plus, I’m hoping you feel empowered to try it yourself!
Click on the links below to listen!
Here is the first part of the interview:
open.spotify.com/episode/47ZDTvAG9dGK1CMmL5Nekc?si=Q3l2kkLGQ4qvFSK5XWmRpw
Here is the second part of the interview:
open.spotify.com/episode/3bVpFZ7i76evvh13CsUuQj?si=3KGUovsRRDOgfC-jbupAVQ
After I read the letter, I discussed some of my struggles with guilt. It’s fucking hard to watch your kids grow up and struggle. It’s hard to forgive ourselves. It’s just all hard sometimes with no easy answers and no quick way to ease the pain.
Today was emotional for me, but I am committed to my healing - and I am committed to sharing my journey with all of you.
I hope you feel seen, empowered, and loved.
Here is the song that has been running through my mind these past couple of weeks.
open.spotify.com/track/2J0TPWSux57fI7SnmroGxT?si=922bb893b2f74ee8
“What Is The Meaning of Life?” - a recap and a deep dive :) #76
Happy New Year! Today I summarize my 2023 and share how I am reframing my perspective. It’s easy to see how many goals I didn’t reach and forget to acknowledge all the other things that I did accomplish.
We can plan for our year but we can never plan for all the shit that we don’t know is coming. It’s important that we recognize all the challenges we faced last year and the obstacles we overcame so we can celebrate our successes instead of just seeing what we failed to do.
“What is the meaning of life?” is the question my son wrote on my whiteboard over Christmas break.
What is the meaning of change?
Is the pursuit of happiness too much pressure?
How can we enjoy the moments of beauty between the struggles?
Listen to this episode to hear my thoughts on these questions!!
“You Might Be Forgetting to Write the Most Important List” #75
Today I discuss my recent epiphany about a new kind of list that I am implementing into my life. We are usually pretty good at writing “To Do” lists but are we forgetting to write our “To Grow” lists?
Join me as I share the things on my “To Grow” list and why I believe it’s so important that we are intentionally seeking growth.
“If we don’t grow, we get left behind.”
For the second half of this episode, I pose the question, “How many summers do you have left?” and then we dive into the vital topic of not wasting our lives pleasing others.
Dare to rewrite your holiday story
Choose to say no to something this season that doesn’t feel good to you
Create an “Honor Plan” and have it in place for those family get-togethers
I hope you all find moments of peace in the middle of this often chaotic, sometimes painful season. I love ya. I got ya.
part two "Nothing Is Wrong With You" a conversation with Michelle Steverson (Part 2 of 2) #74
This episode is Part 2 of my conversation with Michelle Steverson. She shares the second half of her life story when she struggled for many years in search of connection.
Life is messy but Michelle's candor and openness bring a lighter note to what sometimes feels unbearable. Her shit honesty is refreshing and often comical. ;)
Michelle leaves us with the important reminder that "Nothing is wrong with us." Her tenacity to heal and continue sharing her story so that she can empower others is truly stunning.
"Nothing Is Wrong With You" a conversation with Michelle Steverson (Part 1 of 2) #73
This week my friend Michelle Steverson came out to my horse corral and had a deeply vulnerable conversation with me as she shared her life story. I was very honored to hold space for Michelle as she told me about her different life experiences which held a lot of pain and hardship.
Listening to her I saw such beauty because even though things still feel very much like the messy middle, here she is, continuing to show up every day as she seeks healing and growth.
We all need to hear each other's stories. It helps us remember that we are not alone. Although each of our experiences is unique to our life, there is always a common thread of struggle and pain. I am so grateful that Michelle was willing to open up and continue sharing her story in hopes of encouraging someone else.
She is a rare jewel.
This is Part 1 of the conversation. Make sure you head to the next episode to hear the second half of her story and what she is working on in her current life.
A Crucial, Queer Conversation With Kyle Tracy - #72
This week I bring my friend Kyle Tracy back onto my podcast to talk about what it's like being queer.
Kyle is the founder of the "Non Permitted Project" here in Joplin, MO, and this week I traveled to his office to have our conversation.
Kyle brings his honest, brave, authentic self to every conversation and it's always an honor to talk with him.
Kyle graciously takes us back to his childhood and shares what it was like for him growing up and discovering his queerness. I believe this is an important conversation that can give insight to others and act as a guide and reminder that those of us in the LGBTQIA+ community are not alone.
We also dive into what it is like for Kyle now as an adult who owns several businesses and is constantly doing things out in the community.
Kyle encourages all of us who might be struggling to accept ourselves and share our truth with the world, to "Set easy, attainable goals, and take it one step at a time."
Learn more about Kyle and The Non Permitted Project at:
Website:
thenonpermittedproject.com
FaceBook:
The Non-Permitted
Instagram:
the_non_permitted
“Motorcycles and Marriage” #71
Today is a special day. I have two HUGE things that I’m really excited about!!!
First things first: I bought a MOTORCYCLE!!! I share a little about my purchase and the fucking scary ride bringing it home. 🙂
Secondly: I spend the rest of the podcast talking about my partner Nate and what I love about him. Why? Well, because he’s fucking awesome but specifically because the day I record this episode is me and Nate’s 19th wedding anniversary. I couldn’t help but spend this hour telling a few stories about our marriage and why we continue to keep choosing each other.
“Life with Nate is usually great .” 🤣
Do You Feel Invisible? Video episode #70
Today I decided to “bust out of the corral” and take a walk around my property. Sometimes I like to take a stroll through nature as I process my thoughts.
Join me today as I share my musings on:
Life is never-ending…until it is
What I learned in motorcycle class about unintentional blindness
Learning to ride as if I am invisible and how that got me thinking about my own life
What Nate said about seeing life from a different perspective when a certain point of view makes us feel hopeless
We don’t see things as they actually are. We see the world in a way that makes sense to us.
Happy Thanksgiving to all my listeners out there! I hope it’s a peaceful, fulfilling, enjoyable, holiday season for you my loves!
VIDEO! “If You’re Comfortable, You’re Not Growing”
Today I share about my recent adventure of taking a “New Rider’s Course” in order to learn how to ride a motorcycle. I rewind a little and explain how I got onto this crazy idea and then I explain what the motorcycle experience was like. 😎
I discuss:
Rushing through life from thing to thing trying to be valuable
Why isn’t my happiness a good enough reason?
Getting out of my comfort zone
Never feeling prepared for the next lesson
Learning to trust the coach
The huge surprise at the end of all my testing
The 3 zones - Comfort/Learning/Panic
The importance of having a support system in place
Growth happens outside our comfort zone
The lesson my daughters cat taught her
Homework: Listen to “Cookie Cutter” by Ivory Layne (My oldest daughter showed me this and said this is how she feels.
I. Love. This.
Please listen to this song and remember that “Life is an adventure; not a familiar parking space.”
Famous Quote: “There’s no growth in a comfort zone; there’s no comfort in a growth zone.”
Video! “How I won by going slower”…and Why we search for meaning”
This week I share about the half marathon I just completed and how even though it was my slowest marathon in the last 3 years, it was a huge success to me in a whole new way! Recording in sweat pants with ice packs all over me, I talk about how I am finally learning to honor my body. 🙂
Lastly, I share a recent conversation with my mentor about trips that went “south” and us trying to figure out what the hell it was all for.
Here are some points I touch on:
Why do we feel the need to attach meaning to everything?
Is there always a lesson?
Religion taught me that God was always trying to teach me things or punish me
What my daughter’s struggles at public school taught me
Some of our worst, most unexplainable stories are the most relatable
Not wasting time trying to “figure life out”
Live-Let go-Move on
"Healing with Compassion" - a meaningful, vulnerable conversation with my dear friend Taylor Brown.
Taylor bravely shares his life story with us and his struggle to find healing.
We discuss:
- The toxic messages that we learn in childhood
- The things people get wrong about us
- The loudest voice in our head
- The 3 things that help Taylor out of a downward spiral
- Is it realistic to think we will learn something and move on?
- Taylor's passion and how his business has been built from his love for storytelling
- Taylor's message to everyone - "Kindness for everyone and kindness for yourself. It's okay that life is hard. Everyone carries pain and we need to acknowledge that."
Learn more about the amazing things that Taylor does by following him on social media!
Instagram:
g_taylor_brown
frequencymarketingteam
TikTok:
g_taylorbrown
Website:
Frequencymarketingteam.com
Video! Fall Festival Update :)
Today’s episode is a relaxed chat about our recent fall festival we put on here at our farm, LOL! Haven.
I discuss:
How the festival went
What our set up was, including all the activities and games
Why I love putting on events
The celebration of Freedom For The Taking’s First Anniversary
The difference between a wolf and a human’s brain
The greatest gift of being a human
The kind of people I want to have conversations with on my podcast
Video! Boy? Girl? Nope.
I dive into the controversial subject of gender and add my own
delicious confusion, I must first introduce a new member of our family.
She is a tiny, grey, ball of fluffiness who insisted on belonging to us.
Listen today to hear the story of our sweet Valentina Ren!
After a bit of animal distractions, I bring up an important issue I
have been contemplating since I was a child. Am I a boy or a girl?
Gender is a complex, complicated subject and I am only beginning to
scratch the surface of understanding myself, but I do have a new title
to call myself. Listen to this episode to hear my new name epiphany and
how I am rebelling against societal constraints. Here is the book I am listening to right now and LOVING SO MUCH!! “Gender Outlaw” by Kate Bornstein
As I finish up, I share my favorite podcasts and why! Here is the list of what I am listening to the most right now!
"We Can Do Hard Things" - Glennon Doyle, Amanda Doyle, Abby Wambach
"Unlocking Us" Brene Brown
"The Mel Robbins Podcast" Mel Robbins
"Good Life Project" Jonathon Fields
"Sparked" Jonathon Fields
"Good Inside" Dr. Becky Kennedy
And last but certainly not least... I have put together a playlist of
the songs that have and continue to help me in my journey of
self-exploration and discovery! I hope you enjoy it!
open.spotify.com/playlist/08MQsVMs1UA7xfIefJnstQ?si=qWM1PoIbS6qzCN70Adpv5Q
Video Interview with Kyle Tracy - Founder of "The Non Permitted Project"
*Trigger Warning: Mental Health/Suicide
Today I was honored to have a crucial conversation with Kyle Tracy to learn how he is working hard to reach out and support mental health in our community.
I absolutely loved talking with Kyle and his fiance' Quinn about their passion and what their "transitioning" nonprofit is all about.
Kyle shares some of his life story and experiences that led him to decide to reach out to help others.
He is an amazing, compassionate, kind, and extremely caring human doing wonderful and vital things for our world!
If you are looking for a good cause to support, I highly recommend checking this out!
Learn more or contact Kyle Tracy at:
Website:
thenonpermittedproject.com
FaceBook:
The Non-Permitted
Instagram:
the_non_permitted
Video! "Dear Triggered Me" - learning to navigate my triggers #63
Today's episode is a bit challenging at the beginning due to the neighbor cows lamenting the loss of their babies, Zelle's determination to knock over the tripod, and every loud truck in MO driving past my house. Uge! Nevertheless, I persevered because I had a really important subject to talk about.
Today I dig in a little bit on the subject of being "triggered".
I share 3 helpful steps I experimented with this week when I had to work through some huge triggers:
- 1. Give yourself space
- 2. Be curious
- 3. Write
- Which leads us to the biggest step in our healing...learning to advocate for ourselves.
At the end of the episode, I read a letter that I wrote to myself in the midst of feeling scared and triggered.
Check out my blog biketotype.com to read the letter on my blog.
"Dear Triggered Me" - learning to navigate my triggers #63
Today's episode is a bit challenging at the beginning due to the neighbor cows lamenting the loss of their babies, Zelle's determination to knock over the tripod, and every loud truck in MO driving past my house. Uge! Nevertheless, I persevered because I had a really important subject to talk about.
Today I dig in a little bit on the subject of being "triggered".
I share 3 helpful steps I experimented with this week when I had to work through some huge triggers:
- 1. Give yourself space
- 2. Be curious
- 3. Write
- Which leads us to the biggest step in our healing...learning to advocate for ourselves.
At the end of the episode, I read a letter that I wrote to myself in the midst of feeling scared and triggered.
Check out my blog biketotype.com to read the letter on my blog.
If you struggle with being triggered, this episode is for you. It is a permission that we all deserve - Truth to help us understand and embrace every part of ourselves.
What We Love About Non-monogamy - My Favorite Podcast Yet!
This is my favorite podcast yet with my two partners, Nate and Jennifer, as we talk about how our relationship works.
We discuss:
- A recent article I read about when the term "heterosexual" was invented
- Why does it matter if we are queer or how we identify?
- The template we are handed when we marry as heterosexual
- The challenges and joys of being a non-monogamous "throuple"
- What really is normal?
- Are our thoughts really our own?
- Why Jennifer hates labels
- How have these changes affected how Nate perceives himself and has he been a bit "different" all along?
Click below to read the full article that I mentioned and shared some of in this episode!
https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20170315-the-invention-of-heterosexuality
Click below to listen to a great episode that mentions the question I referenced "Are your thoughts really yours?"
https://open.spotify.com/episode/2xZTLknKv7UObRZ2kXTnfZ?si=k4W4e3-ZSrKWmEu5LgmMsg
VIDEO! "The Truth Awoke" a song written for my dad (first piano playing for the horses!)
Today I take an uncommon approach for my podcast and I bring my electric piano into the corral to share a new song I wrote. :) I have never played piano for my horses so this episode is really special to see how much the horses loved the music. Definitely check out the video!!
But before I sing I talk a little about how the episode I wanted to record got sabotaged by my day turning upside down. I am learning a bit about "resiliency" from a recent podcast.
Check out the interview that Robin Douglass did with Resiliency coach Michelle Dickinson on the Coming Out Late Podcast episodes #98 and #99.
The phrase that keeps repeating in my head that Michelle said is "Challenges are opportunities for expansion."
"The Truth Awoke" by Abigail Hobbs
You showed up, and I shut out
The voices screaming deep inside
Betrayed by my own feelings
Religion stripped me of my rights
Years went by, I tried to cope
Convinced that it was I who was wrong
You played the game, played the part
And you strung my heart along
But the truth awoke: Time is up
Turns out, you are a fuck
And I won’t listen to your lies
You can’t fool me anymore
Gravity you can’t deny
Reality kicked down the door
Don’t show me your sad face
Cause I put your ass in its rightful place
Yeah don’t show me your sad face
Cause I put your ass in its place
Don’t tell me that you’re sorry
Forgiveness never did me well
You used your god to bring me shame
Poisoning me with fear of hell
Well, I’m done, and I don’t care
If you think that I’m a bitch
I found out, found my voice,
Stopped the train, made the switch
Cause the truth awoke, Time is up
Go pay the price to be a fuck
I’m no longer the me you brainwashed me to be
I locked you up, burned the key,
Now I’m living wild and free
Cause the truth awoke, Time is up
I am free and you are stuck
*"The Truth Awoke" is an original by Abigail Hobbs - please do not steal it
"The Truth Awoke" a song written for my dad (first piano playing for the horses!)
Today I take an uncommon approach for my podcast and I bring my electric piano into the corral to share a new song I wrote. :) I have never played piano for my horses so this episode is really special to see how much the horses loved the music. Definitely check out the video!!
But before I sing I talk a little about how the episode I wanted to record got sabotaged by my day turning upside down. I am learning a bit about "resiliency" from a recent podcast.
Check out the interview that Robin Douglass did with Resiliency coach Michelle Dickinson on the Coming Out Late Podcast episodes #98 and #99.
The phrase that keeps repeating in my head that Michelle said is "Challenges are opportunities for expansion."
"The Truth Awoke" by Abigail Hobbs
You showed up, and I shut out
The voices screaming deep inside
Betrayed by my own feelings
Religion stripped me of my rights
Years went by, I tried to cope
Convinced that it was I who was wrong
You played the game, played the part
And you strung my heart along
But the truth awoke: Time is up
Turns out, you are a fuck
And I won’t listen to your lies
You can’t fool me anymore
Gravity you can’t deny
Reality kicked down the door
Don’t show me your sad face
Cause I put your ass in its rightful place
Yeah don’t show me your sad face
Cause I put your ass in its place
Don’t tell me that you’re sorry
Forgiveness never did me well
You used your god to bring me shame
Poisoning me with fear of hell
Well, I’m done, and I don’t care
If you think that I’m a bitch
I found out, found my voice,
Stopped the train, made the switch
Cause the truth awoke, Time is up
Go pay the price to be a fuck
I’m no longer the me you brainwashed me to be
I locked you up, burned the key,
Now I’m living wild and free
Cause the truth awoke, Time is up
I am free and you are stuck
*"The Truth Awoke" is an original by Abigail Hobbs - please do not steal it
"Am I Satisfiable?"
Today I talk about a recent podcast I listened to that has gotten me thinking about what it means to live satisfied.
Here are the things I discuss:
- Glennon Doyle's "We Can Do Hard Things" podcast episode #239 'Why are we never satisfied?'
- How our capitalist culture is designed to keep us always wanting more
- My struggles with being a goal-oriented person
- Simple things I have been noticing in my life that bring me full satisfaction
- Learning to not subscribe to the "hustle culture" or the "capitalist culture"
- 3 questions to ask yourself this week...
- Comparing is one of the biggest reasons I feel dissatisfied
- 5 ways I help myself stay grounded, grateful, and satisfied!!!!
Video! Deep Lessons from a Shallow Pond
Another beautiful day in my corral to talk about how I am feeling in my heart with all the recent big changes in our family. I also share a story about kayaking my ponds last week and how it turned into an amazing experience filled with beautiful lessons for me. I hope you enjoy the stories and are inspired to find ways to fill your soul and find the little gifts life has already waiting for you.
My pond take-a-ways:
“It’s not what you saw that mattered; it was that you were looking.”
“If you have a specific thing you are looking for, you will miss seeing all the other things.”
Just look with an open heart. There are thriving opportunities everywhere.”
Deep Lessons from a Shallow Pond
Another beautiful day in my corral to talk about how I am feeling in my heart with all the recent big changes in our family. I also share a story about kayaking my ponds last week and how it turned into an amazing experience filled with beautiful lessons for me. I hope you enjoy the stories and are inspired to find ways to fill your soul and find the little gifts life has already waiting for you.
My pond take-a-ways:
“It’s not what you saw that mattered; it was that you were looking.”
“If you have a specific thing you are looking for, you will miss seeing all the other things.”
Just look with an open heart. There are thriving opportunities everywhere.”
Stabilized Video! Trekking with Zelle and Connecting with Myself
Today we shake things up and do an interactive walk around my front pasture with Zelle!
In this “Trek to Connect” I learned:
To discard my fear of being messed up
I have a hard time not micromanaging my kids and I need to let them find their way (I learned this by trying to help Zelle find the carrot 🙂)
That my overthinking is making me tired
To let go of my worry that I am not capable of handling all the big changes
I need to take time to allow the answers to come
How grateful I am for the things Zelle teaches me
Zelle was my mirror today and I realized that I tend to burst from one thing to the next and carry stress and anxiety with me
Taking time to be a” human-being” instead of a “human-doing” can help ground me and give me time for my fears to subside
Balancing my life is not about not falling off; it's how I treat myself when I do lose my balance
Today’s session was really good for me. I hope you too find value in it.
Video! Trekking with Zelle and Connecting with Myself
Today we shake things up and do an interactive walk around my front pasture with Zelle!
In this “Trek to Connect” I learned:
To discard my fear of being messed up
I have a hard time not micromanaging my kids and I need to let them find their way (I learned this by trying to help Zelle find the carrot 🙂)
That my overthinking is making me tired
To let go of my worry that I am not capable of handling all the big changes
I need to take time to allow the answers to come
How grateful I am for the things Zelle teaches me
Zelle was my mirror today and I realized that I tend to burst from one thing to the next and carry stress and anxiety with me
Taking time to be a” human-being” instead of a “human-doing” can help ground me and give me time for my fears to subside
Balancing my life is not about not falling off; it's how I treat myself when I do lose my balance
Today’s session was really good for me. I hope you too find value in it.
Trekking with Zelle and Connecting with Myself
Today we shake things up and do an interactive walk around my front pasture with Zelle!
In this “Trek to Connect” I learned:
To discard my fear of being messed up
I have a hard time not micromanaging my kids and I need to let them find their way (I learned this by trying to help Zelle find the carrot 🙂)
That my overthinking is making me tired
To let go of my worry that I am not capable of handling all the big changes
I need to take time to allow the answers to come
How grateful I am for the things Zelle teaches me
Zelle was my mirror today and I realized that I tend to burst from one thing to the next and carry stress and anxiety with me
Taking time to be a” human-being” instead of a “human-doing” can help ground me and give me time for my fears to subside
Balancing my life is not about not falling off; it's how I treat myself when I do lose my balance
Today’s session was really good for me. I hope you too find value in it.
Video! Big Changes - College-Public School-And all my feelings :)
Today is a vulnerable episode of the significant changes happening in our family.
-My son heads off to college
-My girls start public school for the first time
My horses circled up to support me, (Zelle was basically trying to crawl in my lap), as I read my most recent blog post describing my feelings on all of it.
Change is difficult even when it's really good change.
My emotions spilled over today as the reality continues to hit me.
I hope this episode encourages others that it's never too late to make changes in your life once you realize you want to do something different.
You get to choose the life you live and you don't have to be stuck in one way even if you have done it for a long time.
Let's keep moving toward the things that bring us peace!
Big Changes - College-Public School-And all my feelings :)
Today is a vulnerable episode of the significant changes happening in our family.
-My son heads off to college
-My girls start public school for the first time
My horses circled up to support me, (Zelle was basically trying to crawl in my lap), as I read my most recent blog post describing my feelings on all of it.
Change is difficult even when it's really good change.
My emotions spilled over today as the reality continues to hit me.
I hope this episode encourages others that it's never too late to make changes in your life once you realize you want to do something different.
You get to choose the life you live and you don't have to be stuck in one way even if you have done it for a long time.
Let's keep moving toward the things that bring us peace!
Video! Heat Exhaustion & Ageism - and what they are teaching me
Today I talk about:
My recent near-death experience when I ran in the heat of the day
How being forced to rest made me realize the importance of being intentional to give my body what it needs
My new favorite audiobook I’m listening to
Why are we all so afraid to age?
The unreality of being ageless
Who are the happiest people?
Conscience Contentment
Age nonconforming and being “age queer” 🙂
How growing older can gift us with a wealth of experience making us rich, deep, and invaluable
Check out Ashton Applewhite’s book “This Chair Rocks - A Manifesto Against Ageism” to learn more!!!
Happy aging my friends!! It’s worth celebrating!!
Heat Exhaustion & Ageism - and what they are teaching me
Today I talk about:
My recent near-death experience when I ran in the heat of the day
How being forced to rest made me realize the importance of being intentional to give my body what it needs
My new favorite audiobook I’m listening to
Why are we all so afraid to age?
The unreality of being ageless
Who are the happiest people?
Conscience Contentment
Age nonconforming and being “age queer” 🙂
How growing older can gift us with a wealth of experience making us rich, deep, and invaluable
Check out Ashton Applewhite’s book “This Chair Rocks - A Manifesto Against Ageism” to learn more!!!
Happy aging my friends!! It’s worth celebrating!!
Video! Interview with Christine Baird - Entrepreneur | Children's Author | Early Childcare Advocate
me in a beautiful conversation with an incredible, vibrant, inspiring
woman. If you struggle to pursue the things you are passionate about,
this woman shares valuable advice from all of her experiences over the
years.
Christine Baird is a one-of-a-kind gem. She is not the kind to
settle. She has goals to change all of America for the better, and she's
gonna do it. Listen here today to hear about all of her goals and how
she is creating a safer environment for the next generation.
Christine talks about:
- How to close the gap and reach your potential
- Why she strongly believes everyone should always have many adventures :)
- The important life lessons that being a softball pitcher taught her
- How she balances her busy life
- And why she encourages everyone to have mentors in their life
Her stories will make you laugh. Her candid humor and authenticity
will make you smile. Her words of wisdom will inspire you to reach
higher.
You won't want to miss this episode. Make sure you send it to a
friend too because everybody could use some Christine in their life!
You can visit Christine at her website abovethestands.com
On her website, you can also buy her new book, "Scary Gary and the Super Sock."
Follow Christine Baird at:
FB business page - Above the Stands, LLC
TikTok - @christinebairdcares
TikTok - @cg_baird
Instagram - abovethestands
Interview with Christine Baird - Entrepreneur | Children's Author | Early Childcare Advocate
Join me in a beautiful conversation with an incredible, vibrant, inspiring woman. If you struggle to pursue the things you are passionate about, this woman shares valuable advice from all of her experiences over the years.
Christine Baird is a one-of-a-kind gem. She is not the kind to settle. She has goals to change all of America for the better, and she's gonna do it. Listen here today to hear about all of her goals and how she is creating a safer environment for the next generation.
Christine talks about:
- How to close the gap and reach your potential
- Why she strongly believes everyone should always have many adventures :)
- The important life lessons that being a softball pitcher taught her
- How she balances her busy life
- And why she encourages everyone to have mentors in their life
Her stories will make you laugh. Her candid humor and authenticity will make you smile. Her words of wisdom will inspire you to reach higher.
You won't want to miss this episode. Make sure you send it to a friend too because everybody could use some Christine in their life!
You can visit Christine at her website abovethestands.com
On her website, you can also buy her new book, "Scary Gary and the Super Sock."
Follow Christine Baird at:
FB business page - Above the Stands, LLC
TikTok - @christinebairdcares
TikTok - @cg_baird
Instagram - abovethestands
Adrienne's Story - Trauma. Healing. Empowerment.
This week I have a special guest, Adrienne Weston, join me today on Coffee in the Corral!!
Be ready to be inspired and amazed at the bravery of this woman as she talks about the trauma she experienced growing up and how she has taken her freedom.
*Trigger Warning: Childhood sexual abuse*
Adrienne shares about her job and why she loves it so much. Her passion is almost palpable as she explains how meaningful it is.
We hear about her best friend, her painful childhood, the dysfunctional family dynamics, and how it all turned into her being responsible for whether her dad went to prison or not. It’s a heart-wrenching story but I know there are many of us who can relate in some way.
Then we get to hear about how Adrienne started taking her power back and finally deciding to say “Fuck No!” It’s so inspiring to hear how she is actively seeking healing and rewriting the story for her own kids.
It’s a difficult listen sometimes but I promise you, it’s worth it. This lady is a shining example that nobody has to ever stay stuck in a toxic way of living when they decide they are done with it.
Adrienne is one badass woman with a vital message for the world. She is honest, brave, relatable, engaging and vibrant! She is an unstoppable force using her power to do great things for those in her life path. A huge thank you again to her for being so brave to share her life story with all of us!