The Absolute Love Podcast
By Absolute Love Adoptions, Inc
Open conversation about adoption has historically not been encouraged. We give voice to Birth Parents, Adoptees and Adoptive Parents, build community inspired by shared experience, and provide a new narrative about adoption.
Tammy, Adoptive Mom
Tammy and her husband began as foster parents with no intention on adopting. That is, until they met their daughter Taylor (Season 2, Episode 3) and her 2 younger siblings. In this episode, Tammy re-lives the time in her life when she met Taylor and the highs and lows of parenting children from hard places.
October 24, 2022
Paige, Adoptive Mother
On Today's episode we are chatting with Paige who is an adoptive mother of two. Her children, both adopted transracially and domestically are in open adoptions with their Birth Parents. Paige is the owner or Love Grown Adoption Consulting and has a passion for educating families who are preparing to adopt. On this episode, we talk about: Identity Family and racial culture Conspicuous families The "checklist" adoptive parents are asked to complete As mentioned, the voice of transracial adoptees are the most valuable in learning about transracial adoption. Here are some of our favorites: Melissa Guida-Richards and her book, What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption Hannah J Matthews Torie DiMartile April Dinwoodie: Born in June, Raised in April Podcast Angela Tucker Resources mentioned in this episode: History of Transracial Adoption: Somebody's Children- the Politics of Transracial and Transnational Adoption by Laura Briggs "The Checklist" blog by ALA
May 18, 2022
Michelle, Birth Mother
Michelle is a Birth Mother and author of Delivered: My Harrowing Journey As A Birthmother, two journals for birth mothers, and two nonfiction books part of a Both/And series: Both Darkness and Light, and Both Then And Now. Her new book Both Cleaving and Cleaving will be released April 25, 2022! Michelle is also the author of this birth mom manifesto that is now being included in our SOLACE gift boxes for Birth Mothers. Michelle placed her son for adoption as an infant. They had no contact until recently, largely stemming from Michelle's feelings like she didn't deserve a relationship with him (which she talks about in this episode). After placing her son, Michelle spent much of her career working as an Adoption Specialist and providing Options Counseling to expectant mothers. As an adult, Michelle's son is now an active part of her family and together they have nurtured a beautiful relationship. In this episode we discuss: Support Groups and what birth mothers need post placement. Resentment and feeling someone made you place your child for adoption. Guilt and shame when choosing adoption. OPTIONS COUNSELING! Absolute Love is launching a course for professionals about Options Counseling, and Michelle conducts Options Counseling regularly as part of her job. Much of our discussing is about how to do this well and some of the challenges and experiences encountered when working with women considering adoption. Resources mentioned: Bill for options counseling On Your Feet Foundation @fromanothamotha @hopeobaker
March 18, 2022
Today’s guest is an incredible 21 year old adoptee, Taylor. Taylor was placed into foster care when she was 7 and adopted at age 12. In our conversation she shared about her life in an unstable home where drugs, alcohol and neglect forced her into the role of parent to her younger siblings, the fear and uncertainty during the years in foster care where she dreaded a possible return to her birth family, her discovery over time of how her experience in a dysfunctional home have contributed to anxiety and her social relationships and nurtured her now strong motivation to help children in hard places.
December 01, 2021
Becca, Adoptive Mother
On this episode we story tell with Becca who adopted her son at birth through domestic adoption. We chat about her about fertility treatments, deciding to adopt as a single woman in her 40’s, judgement and fear in the adoption process, openness, transracial adoption, and ongoing commitment to open mindedness and growth for herself, her child and her family. After adopting, Becca opened RG Consulting to help prepare families for adoption. She recently expanded her program to include a nonprofit branch, Back To The Roadmap Fund, in which she awards grants to applicants who have lost money in the adoption process due to disruptions. Back To The Roadmap Fund is hosting their annual adoption symposium on November 20th, 2021 and as always, it is a powerful day with expert speakers in the adoption community. Get your ticket here: bit.ly/adoption-family-symposium
November 02, 2021
Kristin, Birth Mother/Adoption Professional
Kristin is a birth mother who placed her son for adoption 14 years ago. In this episode, Kirstin talks about her experience as a birth mother, working at an adoption attorney's office, and ultimately opening her business, Evermore Adoption Consultants, as a way to support those working through the unpredictable, and often overwhelming, adoption process. Kristin mentions the New Parents Academy by Valerie Trumbower (Post Partum Doula/Lactation Consultant). Valerie created a Parenting 101 course specific for adoptive families. It can be found using our affiliate link here! In our chat, we touched on the term "unicorn baby" which prompted a further exploration of the term, found on our blog. Kristin also mentions the importance of understanding adoption specific medicine before adoption. We recommend checking out Dr Sara Silvestri, "The Adoption Doc", a Pediatrician and Adoptive Mother.
October 01, 2021
Nicole, Birth Mother, Part 2
One episode wasn't enough for Nicole's interview. Part 2 is a deep dive into the semantics of "throwing away versus giving away", postpartum depression, celebrating the joy of being a birth mother, what the cost of adoption really is, how to manage the awkwardness of adoption constellation dynamics, pumping and selling breastmilk (yes, birth moms can do that) and so SO MUCH more! In this episode, Nicole refers to the Alexis Joy Foundation while we talked about Postpartum Depression. Kathryn mentioned Erie Gives Day, an annual local event in which many nonprofits do a large portion of their fundraising. Find Absolute Love on Erie Gives Day if you're in the giving mood!
June 19, 2021
Nicole, Birth Mother, pt 1
Nicole is a Birth Mother to a 3 year old daughter whom she placed for adoption at birth. After becoming disillusioned with the private adoption world, Nicole found an adoptive family on her own and chose an independent adoption. She has a open relationship with her child's family, but has not seen her in person since placement. Nicole talks about her choice for her unexpected pregnancy and moving forward in a life that she loves fully. She works as a landscaper, is an avid traveler, an eco nut and loves her gym time as she continues on a pretty major weight loss journey. In this episode, Nicole talks about delivering at The Midwife Center for Birth and Women's Health, our nations largest freestanding birth center and praises her Midwife Jatolloa Davis (Now seeing patients in Philadelphia) for her exceptional care.
June 03, 2021
Lauren, Birth Mother
Lauren is a mother who chose adoption for her infant son Aidan nearly 18 years ago. When finding out she was pregnant unexpectedly, she was battling addiction and was parenting another young child. Together she and Aidan's father made an adoption plan, and he became the beloved boy of two families. In this episode, Lauren talks about what her relationship has been like with her son and his adoring parents, Su and Dave, the reasons she chose adoption, and how the decision has affected her life since placement. While Lauren and her son have an open adoption, they have not seen one another in person. Lauren hopes to meet him one day soon. The message of Lauren's story is on the work of making impossible choices in life, and coming to terms with our pasts.
May 11, 2021
Khandy & Kenny, Adoptive Parents
Khandy and Kenny are adoptive parents through private, domestic adoption. Kenny is an active duty Marine. Khandy is a registered nurse who became a stay at home Mom when their daughter came home. In this episode, they talk about their "stork drop" adoption with their daughter, their true love for her Birth Mother and the ways they include her in their lives. They address the notion that black people dont adopt, and discuss the differences between informal adoption and the legal, private adoption of their child. They talk about fertility and the pressures of having biological children, and some of the criticisms theyve faced with regards to growing their family through adoption. Khandy and Kenny can be found on Instagram, and Khandy's youtube channel. They are hoping to adopt again! If you are looking to place a child, text them directly at 910.939.0970. Their adoption profile book can be found here. Resources from this episode: Yes We Adopt Black Adoption Collective
April 09, 2021
Lauren is an intelligent, eloquent woman, wife and mother. She was also adopted as an infant in a closed adoption. On today's episode, we explore the complexities and questions that come with being adopted, even in the most adoption competent families. Now an adult with a child of her own, Lauren discusses how the curiosity factor of her biological identity and origin story has come and gone over the years with different life events, and how it does make her family just a little bit different, even if it doesn't appear that way at first glance from the outside. Lauren says, “You're trying on different pieces of your personality. As you're figuring out who you are as an adoptee, even in the most wonderfully adoptive home, there's still the question of ‘well there's still this part of me that's not really isn't like any of you, I wonder who that comes from. And I think that’s just natural as we’re going through that period of self discovery.”
March 23, 2021
Leah, A Birth Mother
On todays episode we talk with Leah, a Birth mother who at 16 years old placed her daughter for adoption. Today they have a very open adoption and are continually working through the complexities of that relationship. We talk about the grief after visits with her daughter, the fear of birth parents, the need for community and support and how we can continue pushing growth in adoption practices by talking about the hard things. Leah is the voice behind “The Grace Bond,” a blog focused on Faith, Hope, Motherhood and Adoption.
March 03, 2021
Arlene, An Adoptee Perspective
Arlene is a wife, a mother of 3 and the owner of a daycare. She was placed for adoption at birth. While she found her birth mother and relatives years ago, she has yet to meet them in person. Arlene shares her experience of being an adoptee and how a car accident and the birth of her children changed her perspective on her identity as an adoptee.
February 11, 2021
Mallory, a Birth Mom's Perspective on Adoption
Mallory is a 29 year old birth mother who placed her son in an open adoption 8 years ago with a private, domestic adoption agency. During our conversation, Mallory talks about her choice for adoption, and her relationship with her son and his adoptive family. Mallory is a spunky, beautiful woman who invests her free time in her art, creating beautiful work with paint and clay, and is a lifelong gymnast who recently joined the circus, literally! Mallory wrote a book about her adoption experience called "The Little Egg" that is available for purchase on Amazon.
February 01, 2021