Let's Get Sexual

Join Devanshi, Bre and me for the first episode of Season 4! It's been a hot minute and it is so exciting to be releasing the 4th season. In this episode, Devanshi, who is a post-grad med student focusing on sexual health and obstetrics, talks to us about her journey to becoming a Dr. as a Southeast Asian woman, and why she is so passionate about sexual health and wellness. She helps to bust some harmful sexual health and contraception myths, and delves into STI screening, what it entails and why it is so important. This was a fascinating conversation and it was so wonderful to be able to have Devanshi unpack some of the often difficult to understand sexual health space!

Make sure to follow Devanshi on Insta @womenwonders_

Follow me on Insta @aliciafay.coach or visit my website www.alicia-fay.com

Richie Hardcore is an educator, a keynote speaker and activist working in violence prevention, masculinities, mental health, and wellness. He's also a retired multiple New Zealand muay thai champion.

Join us as we discuss Richie’s changing relationship with social media and how each of us has a role to play off screen and in society. Notably we talk about the validation many of us get for calling out people online and the importance of systemic vs individual change. Richie shares some of his story about growing up in an abusive household and how having a shared experience with others has helped him to create spaces where hurt men who might be on the pathway to violence are able to open up and get help. He speaks to thousands of young men around the country about healthy masculinity, relationships and porn. And he opens up about why healthy masculinity is important call in rhetoric compared to toxic masculinity, which alienates those we want to change.  

Follow Richie on Insta @richiehardcore and Richie Hardcore on Facebook.
DM and follow me on @alicia_fay_

I'm changing things up a bit this week. My mid-week's insights with Alicia Fay episode will replace the Sunday guest episode. I've been working hard on this episode and am keen to send it out to the world!

Join me as I discuss how to have agency over your libido - the follow up to the Mystery of Libido episode. From helping you identify your reasons for transforming your libido, to taking you through 12 tools that can help you build a healthier and more authentic relationship with yourself and your sexual desire, this episode is packed!

Once again, I'd love to know your thoughts. Feel free to like and comment on your podcast platform, or DM me on Insta @alicia_fay_

Join Bre as she hosts part two of the conversation with Alicia and Ryan. Bre dives into their thoughts around boundaries and expectations in their relationship. They discuss the importance of being flexible to what life brings, and having goals without being fixated on the detail. Bre then takes them through a round of 'myths of monogamy' and a quick fire round on what they think about each other.

Want to know more? Check out @alicia_fay_ on Instagram

Join me and Sofie for the second part of our conversation as we discuss a range of topics. We discuss sex work, including the stigma around sex work and Sofie's journey in sex work. We talk about porn and that it is entertainment, not education. And Sofie shares her journey coming off of antidepressants.
You don't want to miss this episode!

Find Sofie @uncensoredwellnesss on Insta, and find me @alicia_fay_

Join me for another 'Midweek Insights with Alicia Fay'. In this episode I discuss the mystery of libido.
- What is libido?
- Why do I want to discuss it?
- What are some common myths about libido, and what are my thoughts on these myths?
- What impacts our libido?
- and what are some new ways to think about our libido? (think sexual brakes and accelerators, and the power of context)
Keep an eye out for next week's episode where I will discuss some key ways we can have agency over our libido.
Happy listening!

Instagram - @alicia_fay_
Book recommendation: Come As You Are by Dr Emily Nagoski

This week join us for something a bit different. Alicia's sister Bre takes over hosting, and Alicia gets into the interviewee chair along with her partner Ryan. We discuss how Alicia and Ryan met, how they are working on communication and intimacy, libido differences in their relationship, and how they're growing as a team.
This is part one of two, with part two released in a few weeks. Keep your eyes peeled!

Let us know your thoughts and follow Alicia on @alicia_fay_

This week I am so honoured to have Tash Crosby, the founder of Talk Peach Gynaecological Cancer Foundation, as a guest. Tash is a powerhouse.  As a survivor of ovarian and uterine cancer, she realised there was an urgent need for awareness-raising and education of gynaecological cancers (of which there are 5!). 
In 2019, she launched Talk Peach whose goal is to:
"upskill the public and health professionals, as well as to
empower women to take ownership of their gynaecological health" and their message is snowballing across Aotearoa.

Tash discusses the importance of people knowing about gynaecological cancers and what to look out for. She also talks about what it has been like to start a foundation that quickly gained traction, how she is so passionate about the work she is doing, and her hopes for the future.

Tash is passionate, tenacious, and dedicated and this conversation shed so much light on how all of us need to listen to our bodies more, how we need to be aware of our gynaecological health, and how this is a community-wide responsibility!

To learn more about your, or those you care about, gynaecological health join the 11,000 followers of @talk_peach on Instagram. They share amazing resources, and not just about cancers!!

Also check out the incredible information on their site: https://www.talkpeach.org.nz/

Don't forget to keep an eye out on what's coming next to Let's Get Sexual at my Instagram page @alicia_fay_

Join me for a ;Midweek Insights with Alicia Fay' episode, where I provide insights on a particular topic. This week I discuss relationship glow ups. I talk about the importance of reflecting on and recognising the growth we have gone through in and between our relationships. I discuss my romantic relationship glow up over the last 15 years, and reflect on key relationships and how they impacted me. I can now say that I am in a relationship which is mutually respectful and loving, however, the road to get here was not so well paved, and I know that I still have such a way to go. That's the beauty of the adventure called life.

I'd love to hear your thoughts and feedback. 
Follow and DM me @alicia_fay_ on Instagram.

Join sex coach Sofie Louise and me as we discuss a range of topics, including: her journey to embracing her vulva/yoni (from wanting labiaplasty to appreciating her vulva); exploring sex toys and different pleasure pathways; the fun of mutual masturbation; and faking orgasms and prioritising partners' pleasure . Sofie also discusses the important of building a pleasure practice in our daily lives. 

Keep an eye out for the second part of our conversation that will be released in a few weeks' time.

To see more of what Sofie is doing, check out @uncensoredwellnesss on Instagram. 

And don't forget to follow me @alicia_fay_  to learn what's next on the podcast. 

Join Viki (@vulvacasting) and me as we discuss all things vulva, genital appreciation, and vulva casting. In early 2020, Viki started her journey into casting vulvas. She then created the Vulvarium, sharing her work with the world via instagram @vulvacasting. Viki's work is instrumental in the normalisation and appreciation of vulvas, a part of the body which is usually shrouded in stigma and sometimes shame. People all over the world follow her work and share how her work has impacted them in accepting their own bodies. Viki shares with us how she got into casting vulvas, what the process looks like, and why talking more about our genitals is so important.

Please let us know what you think by leaving a review, and feel free to follow and like this podcast.

To learn more about Viki's work and to get in touch with her, you can find her @vulvacasting on Instagram and https://www.vulvacasting.com/

To get in touch with me DM me on Instagram @alicia_fay_

Join Rebekah and me  for this week's episode. We discuss a variety of things! Rebekah shares various experiences she has had - including attending self pleasure circles, being paid by someone with a foot fetish, and trying out stripping for a day. Rebekah highlights how important it is to grow and be open to evolving. She is a breath of fresh air and it was so wonderful to be able to chat with her.

Follow her on insta: @her.creative.expression

Also, ethical porn suggestions:
XConfessions
Lust Cinema
OnlyFans
Make Love Not Porn
Bellesa.co
PinkLabelTV
JoyBear

Join Nick and me as we discuss:  what makes a good sexual experience; the importance of curiosity and experimentation, and according to Nick - trying things twice; libido and the impact of anti depressants on libido; and using porn in an educated way.

Let me know your thoughts and what resonated with you. Contact me @letsgetsexual.podcast

Also, please rate, subscribe, and review! I'd be very grateful!

Join Nick and me for a two part episode. In Part one Nick discusses puberty, first sexual encounters, and the quagmire of online dating!

In Part two we will discuss sex, sexual exploration, porn and anti depressants' impact on libido.

Let us know your thoughts by direct messaging me @letsgetsexual.podcast on Instagram.

Join me as I get Bre and Tom on to discuss non-monogamy.

This is a two part episode (first of the season, whoop!)

In Part Two  we follow on from Part One and discuss the challenges of non-monogamy, tips for what to think about if you are interested in exploring non-monogamy, and then Tom talks to us about getting a vasectomy (I have so much to learn about this!)

This episode is a great follow on from Tom's episode in season one, where we were introduced to relationship anarchy, non-monogamy, compersion, and interpersonal relationships.

Some great articles regarding non-monogamy and polyamory:
https://www.healthline.com/health/polyamorous#emotional-boundaries   (great info if you are looking at exploring polyamory or want to know more about it)

https://www.insider.com/myths-about-polyamory-debunked-by-people-in-polyamorous-relationships-2019-12#myth-jealousy-doesnt-occur-in-polyamorous-dating-6

https://www.healthline.com/health/open-relationship

https://www.psychologytoday.com/nz/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201407/7-different-kinds-non-monogamy

https://www.brook.org.uk/your-life/non-monogamous-relationships/

Join me as I get Bre and Tom on to discuss non-monogamy.

This is a two part episode (first of the season, whoop!)

In Part One we go through the common myths and beliefs about non-monogamous relationships:  is it cheating, is it less serious than monogamous relationships, are they scared of commitment, do they have group sex all the time, do they get jealous...?

Bre and Tom provide their commentary on how non-monogamy works for them, including the different types of non-monogamy that they follow.

This episode is a great follow on from Tom's episode in season one, where we were introduced to relationship anarchy, non-monogamy, compersion, and interpersonal relationships.

Some great articles regarding non-monogamy and polyamory:
https://www.healthline.com/health/polyamorous#emotional-boundaries   (great info if you are looking at exploring polyamory or want to know more about it)

https://www.insider.com/myths-about-polyamory-debunked-by-people-in-polyamorous-relationships-2019-12#myth-jealousy-doesnt-occur-in-polyamorous-dating-6

https://www.healthline.com/health/open-relationship

https://www.psychologytoday.com/nz/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/201407/7-different-kinds-non-monogamy

https://www.brook.org.uk/your-life/non-monogamous-relationships/

Join Ebs, Bre and me for this week's episode. This episode is such a goodie! Ebs takes us through the journey of her life, weaving a story of growing up in a toxic home environment, spending most of her youth on the marae (which gave her the foundation to be the woman she is today), actively choosing at a point in her life to make changes that would result in the life she actually wanted, and meeting her now wife overseas and moving across the world to be with her. We discuss a lot, including: colonisation, strap ons, nudity, queerness, orgasms,  conscious communication, and letting people and things go in order to grow.  Ebs is so incredible and it was wonderful to be able to have such a frank and open discussion.

Can't wait to hear your thoughts. It would be so wonderful if you could also rate, subscribe and review the podcast :).

@letsgetsexual.podcast

Join Johnelle, Bre and me for this week's episode as we talk sexual exploration, bicuriosity, doing the things that freak the fuck out of us, and staying away from the rut of comfortability. Johnelle is the founder of Girls Get HQ - helping empower women and leading them to their inner self-confidence.

This is a wonderful conversation and we hope you all enjoy! Unfortunately Johnelle's microphone is way better than ours and there are some fluctuations in volume between speakers, apologies for any annoyance!

Follow Johnelle and her amazing work @girlsget_hq

Please don't forget to rate, subscribe and review. Follow us @letsgetsexual.podcast

Join Anna Squelch, Bre and me (Alicia) on this week's episode of Let's Get Sexual. Anna is a holistic life coach and helps cis-women to "kill it at life, love and money". In this episode we discuss: Anna's experience with online dating and how to do it authentically, identifying what we want in a relationship and being clear on expectations, how guardians affect our relationship with love, triggers, taking responsibility for how we turn up in a relationship, and last of all how to know when a relationship is no longer serving us. 

It was such a blast having Anna on. Let us know what you think @letsgetsexual.podcast, and we would love if you could rate, subscribe and review the podcast/episode :)

If you want to know more a about Anna and her work:
Instagram: @annasquelch
Website: https://annasquelch.com/
Podcast: The Full Circle Podcast with Anna Squelch

Join Vicky and me (Alicia) in the first episode of season two. We talk about having sex on playgrounds 😉, how the messages we receive as children about boundaries and sexuality affect us, the difficulties of being vulnerable and intimate during sex (even in a 10 year romantic relationship!), the power of accepting and moving through emotions, and most importantly how not taking things personally is the biggest thing you should learn in a romantic relationship (that one was a bit too real for me 🥴). She also introduces the concept of a sex box, and how hard it is to find and often harder to jump into.

Vicky and I have been best friends since we were 12 (she was that Mills and Boons buddy I referred to in ep 1, Season 1 🤣). We have been through all of the ups and downs that life has chucked at us in 17 years and it was such a beautiful experience to be able to chat with her for the podcast.

Don't forget to rate, subscribe and review! And follow us on @letsgetsexual.podcast

You can follow Vicky on IG @psychadelicsoul_blog

MEDIA REFERENCED IN EPISODE:
*Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus by John Gray
*Two Feets

Last episode of season 1!! As we started, Bre and I get together and discuss even more about sexuality. It's been three months of growth for us, and you can tell by the way we approach the content. We discuss sexploration and being open and honest about your desires, exploring yourself and your sexual partners, and the importance of communication (once again!). A few wines were consumed before this episode, and a few more during. Enjoy, and see you back here for season 2. Follow @letsgetsexual to keep up to date on when that is coming out

Join me and Riba in Part Two as we have a discussion about our favourite sex toys, having sex in public places, and the impacts of sexual harassment and assault. Note: I do discuss a particular incident of me being sexually assaulted.

Like always, this episode is full of laughter, candidness, and all things sexuality.

@letsgetsexual

Join me and one of my best friends Riba in part one, as she takes me through her sexuality story - including her lack of confidence in her femininity and sexuality when she was younger, and her relationship with sex. Particularly she takes us through her journey with vaginismus, which is the often-painful involuntary contraction of vaginal muscles. 

Riba doesn’t just gloss over this part of her life, she gives such an informative rundown of what vaginismus is, she talks about how it affected her, how she ended up journeying through it, and how this has impacted her sex life. You do not want to miss this episode!

@letsgetsexual

Join me, Bre and our guest - Chrissie (aka our eldest sister) - as we go into Chrissie's sexuality story, and how she has navigated her relationship, her body, and her sex life changing throughout her life. She discusses being in a long term relationship, having kids, and setting boundaries. We also go into body image and the ever constant struggle of 'loving' our bodies.

Tune in to part two where we discuss what came up in part one in even more depth, as well as the importance of recognising our white privilege.

Note to read:
Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski
Fat is a Feminist Issue by Susie Orbach

Check out @letsgetsexual.podcast

Join me and holistic sex, love, and life coach Laura Ellen as we discuss how to lead a life of pleasure, the importance of boundaries, the role of communication and how it leads to amazing sex, getting emotional during sex, and female orgasms and our fixation on orgasm as a goal.

'Laura Ellen is a holistic sex, love and life coach, keynote speaker, host of The Sexual Wellness Podcast and a passionate advocate for pleasure-based living. A once fashion stylist, come creative entrepreneur, come dietician, Laura now works beyond the plate to help modern women find nourishing fulfillment by removing the boundaries of pleasure - in all aspects of life. Laura’s mission is to bring healthy sexuality to the wellness table, alongside our green smoothies, and share the roadmap to a happy, healthy turned-on life through food, thought, and a (very) sexy dose of self-love.'

This is an amazing episode and Laura has so many incredible insights and nuggets to share with you all.

You can check out more of her amazing wisdom at:
Insta: @_laura_ellen
Web: www.laura-ellen.com
Podcast: The Sexual Wellness Podcast
Facebook: The Pleasure Posse

Don't forget to check out and follow the Let's Get Sexual Instagram page @letsgetsexual.podcast

Join me, Tom and Bre for this week's episode - Tom's Story. Tom dives into the discovery of his sexuality, in particular his journey to relationship anarchy, and why this philosophy resonates so much with the way he chooses to live his life. Tom discusses the importance of having healthy and open communication in all of our relationships, and why we should all be questioning the beliefs society taught us about romantic relationships. This is such an amazing episode, and I learnt so much from Tom sharing his story. There are key takeaways for everyone! If you have any questions for Tom, or want to share your thoughts and insights - get in touch @letsgetsexual.podcast

Join me, Thoraya and Bre for even more honest and open conversation about sexuality. In Part Two, Thoraya discusses so much, including: body image and finding joy in her body; her mental health journey, and how it has affected her relationships; bleeding during sex; how hard vulnerability is; and why communication is so important. Tune in to the 'candid corner' in the last five minutes where I've chucked in some of our fun 'side' conversations, including how interesting it would be to have a penis for a day (as we are cis-gender women).

Remember to check out the Instagram page to keep up to date with future guests and other good sexual content - @letsgetsexual.podcast

Join me and Thoraya (and Bre, who pops up in the background) as we discuss Thoraya's sexuality story. She takes us through some key memories which impacted her understanding of sex and sexuality. This woman is fire and love rolled into one, and she brings some great insight into how our sexuality stories can impact us for years.

This is Part One of a two part episode. 

Instagram: @letsgetsexual.podcast

For those of you who are interested in the sexuality story process, this bonus episode outlines the exercise Bre and I undertook to identify and explore our sexuality stories (as discussed in Episode 1). If you have any questions or are keen to share how this exercise was for you, please DM me on Instagram @letsgetsexual.podcast.

This week's focus is all about sexuality stories. What is a sexuality story? Listen to this episode and find out! My OG, Bre, and I discuss our sexuality stories, how they've affected us during our lives and how we hope to change our sexuality stories for the future. 

There will be a follow up episode explaining the process we went through to explore our sexuality stories, in case you would like to do the same. This will also be available on the Instagram page @letsgetsexual.podcast. Look out for this in the next few days. 

This is a short prelude where I (Alicia) introduce Let's Get Sexual and why I decided to create a podcast exploring sexuality!

Instagram: @letsgetsexual.podcast