Away With Words
By Kristofer Velasquez
Away With WordsMay 27, 2019
Away With Words: The Thing About Zombies
Happy Halloween! What better way to celebrate than by picking apart the zombie genre like a horde of walking corpses picking on a carcass? Kris tackles the big issues, like why the dead all have the same fashion sense and why our heroes never wear running shoes. Fans of The Walking Dead and Fear The Walking Dead should put your geek caps on to protect their braaaaains (note: real zombies don't eat brains).
Away With Words: No Ghost of a Chance
There’s 100% chance that 50% of the time you are listening to Kris explain paranormal issues you will have a 25% feeling that there is a ghost occupying 5% of the space you’re currently in, which has 0% possibility of being able to be proven to explained. Please note your findings in your ghosthunting evidence journal.
Away With Words: The Answer to the AI Puzzle
If the Terminator or Westworld has taught us anything, it’s that we fail at time travel and cyborgs will always be so much cooler. But they also taught us that in all scenarios, people end up being pretty useless to a race of robots. So before Siri makes it to the 2020 election ballot, Kris shares some insight on the riddle of artificial intelligence. Make sure you’re wearing headphones so that AI folk like Alexa won’t hear this paradigm-destroying epiphany.
Away With Words: Onward and Awkward
Well, this is going to be awkward. Kris just found the solution our stalled human evolution in the face of the apocalyptic progression of technology and our regression of our collective #intellectual development … and it’s more awkward and longwinded than this sentence. From crazy people at Target to the complete failure of handshakes, get ready … this will be awkward (yes, the paragraph started and ended with this statement. Awkward? Yes, used that word again).
Away With Words: This Episode Time Travelled
John Connor and Marty McFly lead us down the time travel rabbit hole as Kris sends you a message from the past. Bill and Ted stand by to save you from the inevitable confusion and mind-blowing effect of temporal insanity trying to tackle paradoxes that fuel some of our favorite stories.
Away With Words: The Death of Rock N Roll
Kris eulogizes the untimely demise of #RockNRoll. Put down your Guns. Leave some Roses on the grave. Find Nirvana.
Away With Words: I Invented Facebook
True story. Kris traces his social media ingenuity back to the film Rain Main. Follow the amazing journey all the way the from the amazing 80s to the antisocial media of today.
Away With Words: Chained Reactions & Triggered Warnings
You've been warned. Calm yourself.
Away With Words: This is 39
Kris has officially been alive for almost 4 decades. He speaks to his kids that are listening to this in some distant future and, in doing so, must thread hispast together. Press mute or stop immediately or you might learn something.
Away With Words: Cheat-ogenic Diet
Struggling to lose weight? Fighting to get healthy? Drop those extra pounds simply by listening to this episode! This miracle treatment uses sound waves to stimulate your metabolism to start burning fat as you listen! Act now! Operators are standing by! While supplies last! No credit card required! Disclaimer: This podcast has not been evaluated by the FDA and is not meant to diagnose, treat, or cure any conditions. Please consult your common sense before committing to any changes in diet or exercise.
Away With Words: The BIG Alien Question
So we're going back to the moon and Kris wants to tackle the BIG alien question (not the existence of extraterrestrial life, but rather how big these creatures might actually be.
Away With Words: The Art of Sleep
Away With Words: Remake Up Your Mind
Away With Words: I've Never Seen Game of Thrones
Away With Words: Kilroy Was Here
"Grow Fonder" A Short Story by Kristofer Velasquez
The only thing that separates astronaut Regina Brice from her 12-year-old daughter is distance. Unfortunately that space is filled with an extraterrestrial catastrophe that threatens the very existence of the planet. Whether or not distance makes the heart grow fonder becomes a curious notion, as Regina shuttles back down to earth amidst an invasion that sends Izzy Brice fleeing for her life with a few classmates. Can a mother’s yearn to close the distance gap save their lives from an alien onslaught? Or will the only thing to grow be the peril to all of humanity?
"Grow Fonder" © 2017 by Kristofer Velasquez
Published by Prolific Press (2017)
Read by the author
Prolific Press (Anthology): https://prolificpress.com/bookstore/inwood-indiana-c-4/the-pop-machine-p-205.html?zenid=kuqgm0j7ps9frr7sf3k2h6j1u3
Links:
https://www.Vaudial.com
https://www.KristoferVelasquez.com
Credits: "Gnarled Situation" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/