Buddha and the Body Coach

Travel poses a unique challenge in that we are out of structure, routines and comfort zones often making it difficult to maintain all of those great habits that got us to health, fitness and a body composition we feel happy with. In the midst of chaos, meals out, jet lag and unknown environments how can we maintain our results?

Alex and T explore this conundrum in this episode sharing insights and guidance from experience of moving around the world as digital nomads and travel enthusiasts.

Optimization can be playful, fun and life affirming, but what happens when it goes too far? In this shorter BuddhaByte we discuss the culture of optimization, when it’s healthy and its dark side. We discuss Huberman husbands, Goop’s vagina candle, almond mum’s, bio hacking, male vs female wellness and other gems.

Shame! What gives? Why do we put up with such a crappy way of being related to and relating to ourselves? Alex and T talk about the animal roots and physiology of shame, the effects of it on our personality, and the different "flavors" of shame. Shame contributes to bullying as well as victim-hood, and can show up in all areas of our lives from body image to social, familial, and even spiritual.

The discussion turns to learning to identify shame and the difference between shame, guilt, and remorse. Next it turns to "Shame-proofing" our lives, living in a more free and joyous way . . . moving beyond the effects of "crippling shame".

A couple more links coming soon!

“It’s just a story”
Anyone who has entered into new age and Buddhist spiritual traditions has heard this, and while it certainly holds pieces of the truth, this stance can often result in us feeling disenfranchised and dismissed, as opposed to truly disidentified and self actualized. 

“You have to be somebody before you can be nobody” - 

Jack Engler, Buddhist psychotherapist PHD

In this podcast we set the record straight on when and how our stories matter and conversely,  when we need to lighten up around our stories and even let them go.  As well as deep and meaningful transformative conversations, expect to hear about Alex's 5th birthday and getting a Teddy Ruxpin toy, how she lied to her teacher that she had been born in Disneyland and how to T wanted to be Evel Knievel.

Please subscribe to get our updates, review us and share with your friends.

Some juicy things we mentioned for your further research...

“It’s just a story”
Anyone who has entered into new age and Buddhist spiritual traditions has heard this, and while it certainly holds pieces of the truth, this stance can often result in us feeling disenfranchised and dismissed, as opposed to truly disidentified and self actualized. 

“You have to be somebody before you can be nobody” - 

Jack Engler, Buddhist psychotherapist PHD

In this podcast we set the record straight on when and how our stories matter and conversely,  when we need to lighten up around our stories and even let them go.  As well as deep and meaningful transformative conversations, expect to hear about Alex's 5th birthday and getting a Teddy Ruxpin toy, how she lied to her teacher that she had been born in Disneyland and how to T wanted to be Evel Knievel.

Please subscribe to get our updates, review us and share with your friends.

Some juicy things we mentioned for your further research...

Therapy speak has entered into popular culture in a big way, accompanied with complex psychological narratives people are using to express themselves and to make sense of the world around them. As with most complex ideas once they enter the mainstream the original context is often lost and the meaning diminished. Whilst learning this language and these narratives have been helpful to many there is now a darker side, and we are seeing these terms misused to attack others and to shutdown connection. In this podcast ep we discuss how this is taking shape in popular culture, and how to best use this new information to create connection and to grow instead of its opposite. 

Introducing 'Buddha Bites' where we do a shorter 20/25 minute podcast on a subject of interest.

When he hear about safe spaces in culture it's often with derision by the right wing media about how soft the younger generations are, but this doesn't really tell us much about safe spaces and why they are suddenly relevant. In this shorter podcast, we explore the concept of safety in our culture and safe spaces and how they can both help and hinder us as human beings. This was an alive discussion that took us on a journey and we hope it does that for you too.

Please rate us 5*, subscribe and share with your loved ones.

T and Alex discuss this controversial and cutting edge topic to explore why females tend more towards disguised competitive strategies as opposed to males who are direct and overt when competing with one another. We discover why this particular evolutionary strategy developed (there are very good reasons), what purpose it served and ideas about moving forward in a world with shifting rules. This is a mostly unexplored topic  which we haven't heard discussed much outside of academia. We are excited to bring it forward in the hopes of inspiring debate and the development of new ideas, so that one day, in the not too distant future, females can move out in the world and finally say openly and without reprisal "I want to win."

This podcast comes with a trigger warning since we discuss sensitive topics such as social exclusion. 

TOXIC: it's one of those 'buzz' words that has made it into popular culture to describe everything we feel has maladaptive qualities. When considering the title for this podcast we had a conversation about whether we ought to use the term, since the very use of it indicates a resistance to what is a common cultural coping strategy. By labelling something toxic we banish it to shameful places in ourselves which in turn shuts down curiosity and open exploration, something very much needed if we are going to understand this phenomenon better. 

We decided to to run with the term since it provides a useful heuristic people immediately connect with, but this conversation is not about tearing down the mantle, we have fun exploring the cultural drive towards positivity and why we find it so hard to experience the full range of our own emotions and that of others. We offer workable solutions to allowing experiences we might find difficult to process, we discuss how capitalism plays a role in reinforcing positivity, gaslighting ourselves and how to reclaim our 'realness' in a culture that is constantly suggesting we self-abandon either overtly or covertly. Fun conversation with many twists and turns. It's good to be back.

Show Notes:

Our 8th and final episode of this series covers a topic we all unfortunately know too well -  emotional reactivity.

We explore:

What is Emotional REACTIVITY!? How does it show up for us? Why do we get reactive and how do we get better at being non-reactive, without sacrificing our own integrity and boundaries? Ultimately we want to understand just why we would let go of this (ego) self protection strategy. What’s the pay off? Is it worth it? We think so. Join us in this conversation which has been a deep subject uncovering many layers of the self.

Topics covered

• What is emotional reactivity?
• How does it show up in the nervous system?
• Why do we get so triggered? What does it mean for our self image?
• Reactivity in relationships and the body
• Tools to work with reactivity

Mentions: Diamond Approach, Adyashanti, Wilhelm Reich, Alexander Lowen, Peter Levine, Bessel van der Kolk

Jean Paul Sartre: It is the source of Sartre's especially famous phrase "L'enfer, c'est les autres" or "Hell is other people", a reference to Sartre's ideas about the look and the perpetual ontological struggle of being caused to see oneself as an object from the view of another consciousness.

Links:

Alex and T take a deep dive into boundaries. . .but hopefully not into each others.

What are boundaries and where do they happen? We discuss different types of boundaries like physical, mental, and emotional as well as boundary qualities from porous to rigid. Work, families, social culture . . .we get into it. Find out about enmeshment, rigidity and control, negative merging, and what's up with the cookie. Monty Python comes up as do a few other great resources below. 

Mentions and Resources:

What are values and why do they matter? Where did they come from and are they ours or someone else's (family, culture, tribe)? How do we get clear about our values, what gets in the way of living our values? We'll look at values and meaning, the platonic ideas (truth, beauty and goodness), as well as living our values without shame, blame, and criticism. How do the more superficial reflect our deeper internal values?

And much more . . .even a cameo Coast Guard helicopter fly over.

Alex and T share a powerful tool they have found in their years of self-exploration and working with others.

Attachment theory is one of the most researched and developed ideas in the field of psychology and relationships. Here is a little history both personal and about this amazing field of study. Covered here: the brilliant researchers, many of them women . . . Mary Ainsworth, Margaret Mahler, Mary Main, Patricia Crittenden, Carol George, as well as John Bowlby, and Dr. Daniel Siegel

Books: 

Attached Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller

Becoming Attached Robert Karen 

The Developing Mind Dr. Daniel Siegel

Strange Situation Bethany Saltman

Links:

A deep dive into the workings of the inner critic also known as the judge and the super-ego.

What is the inner critic? 

How does it function in the mind/psyche both personally and collectively? 

What can we do to begin working with the inner critic and lessen its power? Learn a clarifying technique to "RIDD" ourselves of judgement.

This particular form of inner work can be so impactful and really shift the the way we relate to ourselves. We are very passionate about sharing these understandings, experiences and tools which can facilitate such big changes so quickly.

Resources

Is the universe a friendly place?

Is there a way to connect to an inner sense of "goodness" that we can carry with us even in stressful times?

Join Alex and T as they discuss the path of self-regulation. They will discuss the impacts of self-regulation in their own lives and how those have endured over time. The "what's", "why's, and the "how's" of portable goodness are explored in depth. A well regulated nervous system is the ground for a passionate and joyful life. Join us for the conversation, learn something and have some laughs along the way.

Buddha and the Body Coach is a new podcast by Alex Stone and T Proctor talking about the things that matter, and what makes your life more meaningful and fulfilled. Our first podcasts are released on 14 June 2022 on the Super Moon and we would LOVE you to join us. 

Let's give this some wings!

Please like, rate and subscribe to our podcast, and tell your friends.

If you would like to get in touch with us you can email us : buddhaandthebodycoach@gmail.com