Graceful Atheist Podcast

Arline guest hosts to ask David anything. David tells his deconversion story. He talks about the beginning of the Deconversion Anonymous FB group. David goes deep on what Secular Grace is and what it means to him. Links Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Why I am a Humanist https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/11/18/why-i-am-a-humanist/ Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/12/18/ask-me-anything-2022/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Support the podcast onPatreon https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

AMA? Try AAA. Ask Arline Anything. This week’s guest is your community manager, Arline. Arline tells us what she has learned from managing the community and interviewing guests. She explains how her views have changed on Christianity and fundamentalism after deconversion. She let’s us know what makes her mad and what gives her hope. She reveals her love language(s). Join me in thanking Arline for all the work she does for the community and the podcast. Let her know she is appreciated. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/12/11/ask-arline-anything-2022/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Support the podcast onPatreon https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

Content Warning: Spiritual, physical and sexual abuse. Depression, post-partum depression, infertility and suicidal idealization. Arline guest hosts interviewing author and podcaster, Nicki Pappas. Nicki Pappas is a writer who critiques the evangelical establishment that shaped her. She’s the author of As Familiar as Family: Leaving the Toxic Religion I Was Groomed For. She’s also the host of the Broadening the Narrative podcast where she interviews guests who are broadening the narratives she was taught within white evangelicalism. She has three young children with Stephen Pappas, her steady partner in the chaos since 2010. Through her work, she desires to spark hope in the world around her and live out an embodied faith. Links Website https://www.nickipappas.com/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/broadeningthenarrative/ Broadening the Narrative Podcast http://broadeningthenarrative.blogspot.com/ #AmazonPaidLinks As Familiar as Family: Leaving the Toxic Religion I Was Groomed For https://amzn.to/3FlMRez Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/12/04/nicki-pappas-as-familiar-as-family/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Support the podcast onPatreon https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Jessica Moore, a life coach focusing on purity culture. Jessica grew up in a non-denominational Christian in Salt Lake City Utah surrounded by Mormons. She felt both the pressure to evangelize and be proselytized. Jessica went to an unaccredited Christian college where she first began to have doubts. She wound up traveling to Israel and seeing life on both sides of the Palestinian/Israeli border. She experienced the reverse culture shock coming back to the United States. Jessica put a lot of pressure on herself to be a “godly woman.” Purity culture had a damaging impact on her life. The focus of her work now is helping people recover from purity culture and religious abuse. Links Website https://jessicamoorecoaching.com/ Series of Expansion blog https://jessicamoorecoaching.com/blog Instagram https://www.instagram.com/becomingyou.coaching/ Interact My appearance on the I Was A Teenage Fundamentalist podcast https://pod.link/1558606464/episode/f8067a71cf74f38205420663954fceaf For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/11/27/jessica-moore-becoming-you/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Support the podcast on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/gracefulatheist Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

Ben and Ang have been married for seventeen years. They met as tender homeschooled church-kids. They married young, and the church’s “formula” worked well for a while. They were mostly happy and went on to have kids of their own. But little things from childhood would pop up now and then—purity culture shame, fear of emotions, fear of the end of the world… In June of 2016, the shooting at Pulse nightclub “broke” Ang, and she knew she had to find a different way forward. By 2017, they both were out of church—Ben trying to save their marriage; Ang trying to save herself. Now, Ben and Ang are navigating a new and more intimate life together. They’re both agnostic, defining agnosticism a little differently from one another, but they both agree—this life is most important, and it must be lived to the fullest! Links Instagram https://www.instagram.com/buildanadventure/ Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/11/20/arline-interviews-ben-and-ang/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guests are podcasters, Nathan Alexander and Todd Tavares of Beyond Atheism. Nathan grew up Anglican and in his early twenties, he realized there were no good reasons to continue believing. Todd grew up Catholic—technically still confirmed—but even at ten years old, he was a skeptic, wanting to explore reality rather than make-believe. In this interview, Nathan and Todd discuss racism, humanism, community-building and what it means to live thoughtfully in a godless world. It’s a sharp conversion you don’t want to miss! Links Beyond Atheism https://www.nathangalexander.com/podcast Race in a Godless World: Atheism, Race, and Civilization, 1850-1914 https://www.nathangalexander.com/book-race-in-a-godless-world #AmazonPaidLinks https://amzn.to/3hGdEtO Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/11/13/nathan-and-todd-beyond-atheism/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Heather Wells, author of Trustworthy: A Journey from American Christianity to Freedom. Heather grew up in a happy Christian home, attending a variety of churches—from “Women cannot wear pants,” to “There are drums!” She married at eighteen and expected to have a similarly happy marriage as her parents, but no matter how hard she worked—both literally and metaphorically—that was not going to happen. Heather felt like a spectator, watching the men around her plan her life. It looks years of a one-sided marriage, churches refusing to help and zero answered prayers for Heather to realize she had to be her own savior. Once she had a well-paying job and more education, she no longer needed others to rescue her and her family. Heather now enjoys a life that is her own and no one else’s. She is the trustworthy one. She can look to herself—her own intuition, her own knowledge and education—for what is best for her. That is a sweet gift that no one can take from her. #AmazonPaidLinks Trustworthy: A Journey from American Christianity to Freedom https://amzn.to/3heAKHA Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/11/06/heather-wells-trustworthy/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

Humanist author and speaker, Joe Simonetta, grew up in a Catholic home with good values. He and his brothers “did well,” and he is thankful for the foundation his parents gave him. As a young man, affected by all the suffering in the world, he vowed to be part of the solution. He has lived a fascinating life, holding degrees from multiple universities, traveling extensively and enjoying all kinds of professions. His full bio is available here. Joe is hopeful about the future and has three basic rules that he believes can change the future for humanity: Be healthy. Be kind. Respect the environment. Links Website and books https://joesimonetta.com/ Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/30/joe-simonetta-seven-words/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is the content creator, @boundless_and_free. Boundless grew up in a good Christian home, attended a PCA church and believed all was well in her life. She would later learn the term CPTSD and understand that a “good Christian upbringing” may not have been quite what she’d thought. In college, Ms. Free first experienced anxiety and depression but had no vocabulary for it. The Church rarely discusses these things. It wasn’t until the “perfect life” she’d been promised began to unravel that she realized she needed a different way to understand “god” and herself . Now, as a “parts work” therapist, she helps others on their own journeys. Her personal experience of the divine centers around the ways that humans are connected to one another and the universe. Once again—whether someone leaves religion and becomes an atheist or continues on a spiritual journey—the real purpose in life comes from connecting with other people. We are all in this together, and we each get one life to leave this world better than we found it. Links Counseling Website http://theempoweredselfcounseling.com/ Boundless and Free on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/boundless_and_free/ Religious Trauma Institute https://www.religioustraumainstitute.com/ Secular Therapy Project https://www.seculartherapy.org/ You are not broken, you are human https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/12/06/you-are-not-broken-you-are-human/ Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/23/arline-interviews-boundless-and-free/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Keke. Keke grew up a PK. Her family was in church, “running the show,” anytime the doors were open. Life at home was difficult for Keke, however, so the church provided a safe haven. But over time, domestic violence, mental health problems and other family secrets were too great a burden for her to carry. After high school, she joined the military, got married and even led her husband to Jesus. Then in 2017, as she was reading a most peculiar bible story to her daughter, she started on a deconstruction journey that she never saw coming. Keke now is learning everything she can about ancient mythologies, African American history and many other cultures. She’s also raising her children to be open to the world and its many cultures. She knows that human connection is truly what we need—whether with our ancestors through stories or with those around us today. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/16/keke-deconversion-of-a-pk/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Daniel. Daniel is a social scientist with a master’s degree in psychology. He grew up in the United Church of Canada, but church wasn’t a huge part of his life until high school. He then went to bible college and worked in ministry. He tried to experience God like others were, but it just wouldn’t happen. He took on the “Office of Skeptic,” for himself. He hoped it would both help his faith and the church. He could articulate questions and doubts that others couldn’t. Were these miraculous stories true? Was God really even there? If so, what the hell was he doing? Unfortunately, this only kept him in the church longer than he needed. By 2020, he’d been an agnostic theist for years and was finally seeing the harm done in North America by White Christianity. Now Daniel writes and speaks, sharing his knowledge with those struggling with addictions and other mental health needs. He no longer looks to the supernatural for miracles but knows how much human connection is the true healer. Links Here’s How Religion Imprints Us — Even When We Walk Away https://www.templeton.org/news/heres-how-religion-imprints-us-even-when-we-walk-away Religious Identity and Morality: Evidence for Religious Residue and Decay in Moral Foundations https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167220970814 Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/09/daniel-office-of-the-skeptic/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Treasure who is interviewed by Arline, the Deconversion Anonymous community manager. Treasure grew up in the Seventh Day Adventist tradition. Her whole family was focused on ministry. Treasure is a singer and she was continually asked to sing for every church she attended. She was focused on mental health issues and ministering to people in need. In 2020, Treasure began to quietly question her faith and began the slow painful process of deconstruction. Though she still loves hymns, even music, once a joy, has become “confusing” due to the obligation to perform for churches and feels like a “job”. Treasure has found spiritual and community fulfillment in her current spiritual practices of meditation, intentional journaling and yoga including sound bowl healing. She is also a participant in the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group where she says it is safe to vent. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/02/arline-interviews-treasure/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

Content Warning: miscarriage; traumatic birth; mental health problems; hell anxiety This week’s guest is Julia. Julia is the clever mind behind @painfulpostchristianprayers on Instagram. Julia grew up in a German mostly-atheist environment. The hostility, however, she saw for religion made it all the morning appealing. As she came of age, she found herself confirmed in the German Lutheran church but attending and loving a very American Baptist church. Julia was all-in but soon found some doctrines were a bit much, especially the teachings about Hell. For years, Julia threw herself into American Church World—she read the entire Bible, went to university to become a missionary doctor, met her spouse at church, even read Joshua Harris’s books! But life has a way of forcing some to wonder if the God they believe in really is as kind as they’ve been told. After one incredibly trying event after another, Julia could no longer see God’s “goodness.” She began to see through the “incredibly ridiculous explanations” people gave when God did not come through. Julia is in a very different place now, and her online presence provides an outlet for the anger that had been pent-up for so long. It has also brought her community. She is far from alone, thousands are waking up to the lies and empty promises of Christianity. And that is what is what humans truly need—not a distant pretend deity but real human connection and relationship. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/09/25/julia-deconstruction-of-a-doctor/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

Stay skeptical? This week’s guest is Thom Krystofiak. He’s the author of Tempted to Believe: The Seductive Power of Claims About “The Truth.” Thom grew up Catholic but as an adult began practicing TM, Transcendental Meditation. He followed gurus and groups for decades, even though he was never quite convinced of the more spectacular claims of TM. Thom shares about his experiences in the TM movement and what pushed him out. He also discusses important questions people, regardless of their belief or skepticism, could ask themselves: What do I mean by truth? How do I find the truth? And how much does truth really matter? Links Tempted to Believe: The Seductive Power of Claims about "The Truth" https://amzn.to/3qKAa63 Thom’s personal site https://krystofiak.com/ Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/09/18/thom-rystofiak-tempted-to-belive/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Doug. Doug became interested in church when he was in junior high, and when Doug is in, he’s all in. He was a believer throughout high school, college and into the military. But then books and magazines happened. Doug began reading more “skeptical literature,” and the questions began. Doug’s faith unraveled while he was “an atheist in a foxhole,” but faith in the supernatural was unnecessary. He needed his own strength, and the strength of the people around him. He has since been an atheist pastor, finding the human connection he and his wife needed, without changing their beliefs or forsaking their values. As Brene Brown says, “We are hardwired to connect with others,” and Christianity has no longer cornered the marked on community and belonging. Links Unitarian Universalist Church of Tullahoma https://tullahomauu.org/index.html Doug’s Short story “The Faith I Left Behind” is in the book, The Sandbox: Dispatches from Troops in Iraq and Afghanistan https://amzn.to/3RYrHaZ Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/09/11/doug-traversa-atheist-minister/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Cooper. Cooper grew up deeply immersed in church world. From the time she was a little girl, she was devoted to God and obedient to her family. In high school, life threw her a curve ball, but she continued faithfully loving Jesus and doing what she believed to be best. Parenthood, marriage, church life and military life all, in different ways, knocked her feet out from beneath her. Every year it seemed like something was more difficult, more uncertain and the church wasn’t always stepping up with the support she needed. After years of questions without satisfying answers, Cooper finds herself a woman—more than a wife and mom—with options and freedom to choose her own life. She may not have the answers to every question, but she’s okay with that. She and her children keep moving forward, empowered now to love one another without sacrificing themselves. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/09/04/cooper-deconstruction-of-a-mother/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Jack Robertson. Jack is a returning guest and an integral part of the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group. Earlier this year, Jack’s youngest daughter, Emily, was in an accident, suffering severe burns on her body. Jack discusses how his online community and IRL friends stepped in to support his family. He also discusses the anger and hurt their family experience at the platitudes and cliches of the Christians in their lives. Emily’s clearheadedness, dark sense of humor and incredible resilience has brought her a long way in the healing process—mentally, physically and emotionally. Jack and the rest of their family are also healing in their own ways, supporting one another and seeking professional help. We are Human. We are social beings whose needs are not met by “a guy in the sky.” Our needs are met through our relationships with one another, especially those who are closest to us. Links Go Fund Me https://gofund.me/bba4d01e Jack’s Deconversion episode https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/10/31/jack-robertson-deconversion-story/ Kenyetta and Jack Save the World https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/kenyetta-jack-save-the-world-4099553 Graceful Atheist on Kenetta and Jack Save the World https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/kenyetta-jack-save-the-world-4099553/episodes/the-abcs-of-grace-127398471 Musings of an ADD Mind https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/musings-of-an-add-mind-2160439 Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/08/28/jack-emilys-story/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

Content Warning: This week’s story includes references to physical and emotional abuse, mental illness and suicidal ideation. Listener discretion is advised. This week’s guest is Jan. Jan grew up in a strict fundamentalist household which made church safer, and that disconnect planted the first seeds of doubt. She went off to a Christian university where she was told to expect “signs and wonders”, but they didn’t happen. Becoming a missionary wife was supposed to satisfy her “need to serve God” but it didn’t happen. Again and again, as she pursued God, she was let down. Trauma, depression and unfulfilled promises slowly broke her, and even then, God didn’t show up. She had been doing it all on her own, and it would take a divorce and leaving the Church completely, for her to see that. After finding care and support in therapy and “spiritual but not religious” communities, Jan now supports others struggling with mental illness. She is living a life filled with grace both for herself and others. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/08/21/jan-mental-health-and-deconstruction/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Matthew. Matthew grew up in the Pentacostal tradition and went from being a youth leader in high school to a full-time international missionary as an adult. He had all the right answers to all the important questions. The missionary life, however, didn’t turn out as he’d expected. He and his team did everything in their power to tell people about Jesus but nothing supernatural was happening. Year after year, “the hiddenness of God” became too much for Matthew. It hasn’t been easy for Matthew to get where he is now—living a freer life, not having to have all the answers, not having to wait for the supernatural to happen. He loves people closest to him, enjoys his friends and acquaintances without judgment, and those small things are what slowly change the world. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/08/14/matt-deconversion-of-a-missionary/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Drew. Drew grew up as a Missionary Kid and has traveled to nearly every continent and all across the United States. Drew spent years of his life evangelizing and serving others through construction, farming and carpentry. Drew has since left mainstream evangelicalism, with its exclusivity and supremacy culture, but he is using the tools he developed. He and his family serve their local community right in the Bible Belt with a market, concerts, a community center and so much more! Humans don’t need a supernatural being to come to our rescue. We need one another. We need each other’s abilities and companionship. Drew and his family are changing the future by building intentional community right where they are. Links NOTE: Not an endorsement The Perch https://www.theperchcomer.com/ Rupert Spira Podcast Episode 47: The Weekend University https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/rupert-spira-podcast/id1494564673?i=1000571203239 Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/08/07/drew-community-and-consciousness/ Graceful Atheist YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/c/GracefulAtheist Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Adria. Adria is a sociologist working in international development. Adria grew up in various multiethnic churches but each one seemed to worship whiteness alongside Jesus. By the end of college, Adria was done with church. Years later, in atheist spaces, she would find racism to be just as prevalent. Her experience with the Christian missionaries showed her the inequity that must exist for missionary work to thrive. In the last decade she has since seen that Western nations continue missionary work; only as evangelists for “neoliberal economic systems” rather than the gospel. Adria’s understanding of supremacy culture’s effects on humanity is invaluable to any community—church, atheist or global—working toward a more equitable world. She truly is a model of graceful atheism. We discuss international development, missionary work, economics, equity, racism, atheism, black non-believers and much more. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/31/adria-racism-in-the-missionary-field/ Catch me on former guest, Robert People’s, Affinis Humanity, Instagram live Thursday August 4th at 5 PM EDT https://www.instagram.com/affinishumanity/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/ Photo By James Barry http://www.treaty2u.govt.nz/images/impact-main-1.jpg, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=12666818

This week’s guest is Jenny McGrath. Jenny is a licensed mental health counselor, a somatic psychotherapist, and a movement educator specializing in religious trauma and sexual abuse. She believes “in the power of story and the wisdom of the body.” Jenny’s work stems partly from her evangelical upbringing in Colorado Springs. She was steeped in the world of purity culture. Her work also comes from a broad understanding of the history of purity culture—women’s disembodiment, trauma, gender erasure, systemic racism and more. Jenny guides and support others in their journeys to liberation and hope after years of harm and trauma. She is truly living out secular grace! Links Counseling website https://www.indwellcounseling.com/ Embodied Sexuality Course https://www.indwellmovement.com/embodied-sexuality Purity Culture Research Collective https://puritycultureresearchcollective.com/ Recommendations Podcasts Straight White American Jesus podcast https://straightwhiteamericanjesus.com/ Books #AmzonPaidLinks The Purity Myth by Jessica Valenti https://amzn.to/3aWcvvf Virgin Nation by Sara Moslener https://amzn.to/3zuiqB9 Shameless by Nadia Bolz Weber (progressive Christian perspective) https://amzn.to/3RPCmW2 Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/24/jenny-mcgrath-embodied-sexuality/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is B. B grew up homeschooled in a large evangelical household and spent nearly thirty years in the church, trying to fit in.  He had felt like leaving for a while, never having belonged, and then in 2016, he knew it was the end for him. He hit the door running. One of the most destructive forces within his Christian upbringing was Purity Culture. Since deconverting, he’s learned that he isn’t alone when it comes to loving yourself and exerting your autonomy. Links Instagram https://www.instagram.com/happyinmyownskin/ Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/17/arline-interviews-b/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Bob Barnes. Bob is an organizer with BAHA, Bluewater Atheists, Humanists & Agnostics. BAHA “is a non-profit organization dedicated to improving the image of Freethinkers and Atheists and to give back to our communities.” BAHA is hosting its annual conference, BAHACon, this year with speakers and events you won’t want to miss! August 26 – 28th, 2022 in Sarnia, Ontario, Canada. Links BAHACon https://bahacon.com Bluewater Atheists, Humanists and Agnostics https://bluewateraha.com/ Promo Video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hbXUm4C_JDc Interact For quotes, recommendation and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/10/bob-barnes-bahacon-2022/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

After years in the mission field and in pastoral ministry Paul is done. Paul is Deb's (last week's guest) husband. Deb's episode https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/26/deb-is-done/ Interact For quotes, recommendation and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/07/03/pual-is-done/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Deb. Deb “asked Jesus into her heart” at six years old and remained a devoted follower of Jesus for decades. She married her high school sweetheart, started a family and found herself living the missionary life on the continent of Africa. As the years passed, Deb’s faith was tested—praying and watching children die on two continents, her husband pointlessly fired from their church, meeting different types of Christians and the reading of diverse books. Deb had more and more questions about her lifelong faith. Today, Deb’s spirituality is one that stays curious and open to new thing, no longer holding tightly to any one creed. Her story is a beautiful one filled with compassion and love and a desire to meet people wherever they are. She is truly living out secular grace. Interact For quotes, recommendation and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/26/deb-is-done/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Ruby. Ruby is an author, blogger and YouTuber, living her journey out loud for the benefit of her followers. Lutheran to her core, Ruby spent her life committed to the institution of the Church. It took multiple heartbreaks and difficulties in life before she began to wonder, “Is any of this true? Is any of this real?” She threw out the formal church experience first. Then, through her impressive consumption of non-fiction books, she was able to be rid of the Bible and finally Jesus. Now, Ruby’s life is all about love and kindness toward her fellow human beings. As far as supernatural beliefs, she looks to “the flow,” of the Universe. She’s able to define god in her own terms and her life—and the lives around her—are better for it. Links Poetry https://thepreciouspoet.blogspot.com/ What do I believe? https://thepreciouspoet.blogspot.com/p/what-do-i-believe-may-7-2022.html Book blog and recommendations https://rubygetsreal.blogspot.com/ Atheistic Lent https://authenticlent.blogspot.com/ Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/19/ruby-gets-real/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Post on satisfaction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/01/19/i-still-havent-found-what-im-looking-for/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

Community manager, Arline, guest hosts. This week’s guests are a couple of fabulous black women who’ve come a long way in their journeys away from white evangelicalism. They’ve known one another for over a decade and their conversation is both information and so much fun. Marissa grew up in church and loved it as a kid. As a college student, however, she found herself in a ministry that was a little bit “culty.” And then as an adult she watched all the white friends she’d served alongside fall for a new savior, Donald Trump. Raven grew up in a “culturally Christian” home but dove head-first into campus ministry in college. By 2012, when George Zimmerman murdered Trayvon Martin, she began to see whiteness, not Jesus, as the true god of people she’d known for years. Marissa and Raven are currently in different spiritual places but neither can go back to the Christianity they knew as young adults. Their lives are freer and fuller than they’ve ever been before, and they see that it is good. Interact Full episode show notes including quotes and recommendations https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/12/arline-marissa-and-raven/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

Our guest this week is Dave. Dave grew up in the Mennonite Brethren faith and followed all the rules until at age 50, a gift from his son made him begin to ask questions. Dave’s love for his family and a desire for truth are equally apparent in his story. He asked hard questions and was never given satisfying answers. Knowing he had to tell his wife about his waning faith, Dave feared the consequences. Fortunately, Dave and his family have chosen to turn toward one another in love. It has been a trying journey for Dave, but he knows that pursuing truth and loving the people around you give life purpose. Interact For quotes, recommendations and more see the full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/06/05/dave-gossen-agnostic-and-done/ Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode. This week’s guest is Elizabeth. Elizabeth grew up in what she calls a “Methodist Baptist” church, mostly Methodist but with more conservatism and even some charisma thrown in. Elizabeth loved church as a kid, but as a teen, things were harder: purity culture demands, a youth pastor leaving abruptly and even a camp with exorcisms. Looking back, Elizabeth sees a theme: The parents did little to help the kids feel and be safe. After graduation, Elizabeth went to a Baptist college where she met (again!) and married her now-husband. When adversity hit, trying to expand their family, they saw their Christian friends’ true colors. Throughout a difficult pregnancy, crying out to God, Elizabeth thought, No one is listening and no one is coming to save me. She continued hoping, though, only to be let down again and again. Church people will not support you and no god is coming to save you. Elizabeth sees that it was here. She was the strong and resilient one all along. She bore the load, the emotional, physical and mental weight. No one—neither supernatural or human—showed up to help. Now, on the other side of faith, Elizabeth has her immediate family and a strong community of friends, diverse people walking alongside her. She no longer looks to the sky for help, but knows she has all she needs inside her and right around her. Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/29/elizabeth-deconversion-anonymous/ Review: Hell is the absence of God https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/06/04/review-hell-is-the-absence-of-god/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode. This week’s guest is Shannon. Shannon’ story delves into the emotional experience of deconversion. Shannon grew up in an Independent Fundamental Baptist church, where the teachings were pernicious. As a teen and into adulthood, Shannon knew her own beliefs and convictions did not always align with her church or family. She tried to be who they wanted her to be, but her decisions were never quite enough for them. Over the years, she slowly, like “mental velcro,” ripped out the only beliefs she had known. Where her family couldn’t hold space for her questions, her husband could. It was a hard journey, but she wasn’t on it alone. Today, Shannon misses the certainty she used to have, the path laid out in front of her with easy answers. But she is able to see the world with new eyes—the glory and majesty of nature, the wonders of scientific inquiry. It has changed her for the better, and she isn’t looking back. Recommendations Thought Experiments For Believers https://gracefulatheist.com/2018/12/03/thought-experiments-for-believers/ Deconversion How To https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Review of Hell is the Absence of God https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/06/04/review-hell-is-the-absence-of-god/ After Life trailer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eIGGKSHMQOM The Invention of Lying trailer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhRnmyBjOLs Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/22/shannon-deconversion-anonymous/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode. This week’s guest is Seth. Seth was the oldest child in a large homeschooling family who attended attended mostly non-denominational churches. He was always studious and had read through the Bible multiple times before adulthood. In high school, Seth made his faith his own and dove deeply into Youth Earth Creationism. He studied at a state university and a few years after graduation began work at The Creation Museum. While living near the museum, Seth was introduced to a fringe religious movement he describes as “Messianic Judaism meets evangelicalism meets conspiracy theories.” In the Hebrew Roots movement, Seth discovered teachings he’d not encountered before and some doubts began to creep in. Over the next year, Seth continued to experience conflicts between YEC and Hebrew Roots. The two ways of thinking were at odds—flat earth or round, scientific cosmology or the broken body of a leviathan? By 2020, Seth realized he was an atheist, no longer able to convince himself to believe again. Recommendations Books Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari Youtube Paulogia Viced Rhino Godless Engineer AcapellaSciencehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydqReeTV_vk Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/15/seth-deconversion-anonymous/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s show is a Deconversion Anonymous episode. This week’s guest is Anne. Anne grew up in a loving and happy Christian home in a large city where her father pastored a small reformed church. As a teen, her faith was very real to her, and a few years later, she attended a Christian college, but struggled mentally and physically. Anne left that school and attended a Bible college, but she quickly realized she would be excluded from most ministry opportunities because of her gender. After a short and sometimes insulting experience in children’s ministry and then a sickness that went on for man years, Anne felt like God had “benched” her, but she continued praying and hoping. Over the next many years, Anne’s family met one obstacle after another—toxic or cult-like churches, physical and mental illnesses, Christians backing Trump and even loved ones passing away. Finally, she couldn’t take any more. “I couldn’t hear from God…I couldn’t worship. I couldn’t hypnotize myself with the piano. I couldn’t do anything…[I was] done.” Then during the Pandemic, Anne read a single book that made her stop and think for a moment. Then, her questions started coming and couldn’t be stopped. From the outside, it may seem like Anne’s deconversion was quick, but she had given God plenty of time to reveal himself. Recommendations The Lasting Supper Deconversion Anonymous Harmonic Atheist MythVision Bart Ehrman Darkmatter2525 Holy Koolaid Books #AmazonPaidLinks Jesus & John Wayne by Kristin Kobes Du Mez https://amzn.to/388uqxl Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/08/anne-deconversion-anonymous/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is artist Ursula Schneider. As a child, neither her charismatic church nor her unstable home were safe for her. There was a lot of mental illness at home and Ursula often felt abandoned by the church. Their family was simply “too much.” Ursula grew up, married young and began going to church again. As an adult, she needed something real to her. She saw that something in the women at church, so she dove right in—daily prayer, bible studies, women’s retreats, all of it. But Ursula kept bumping up against a certain church doctrine: women cannot teach men. She was a gifted leader and teacher but church after church kept her out of the pulpit. At the last church she attended, Ursula faced the greatest challenge yet to her faith. Over the span of a few months, she and her husband went from being well-respected leaders to losing their entire community. Ursula went through a depressive state and cried out to God, but no answer came. Over the next few years, Ursula would make beautiful art, write for herself and continue to question her religious beliefs. Since leaving, Ursula has dabbled in other faiths, wondering if any will fit her. Nothing has yet, but she is learning and growing as a whole person. She no longer has to squash part of herself or silence her own curiosity. Ursula’s art and writing empower others to exist as their whole selves in the world and to see beauty and inspiration in the world around them. Ursula Schneider art exhibition through May 25th 2022, at D&R Art Gallery and Studio in Tucson, AZ. Links Website https://www.ursulaschneider.art/ Personal FaceBook https://www.facebook.com/ursula.d.schneider/ Business facebook page https://www.facebook.com/ursulaschneiderart Instagram https://www.instagram.com/ursula_schneider_art/ People can also email me at ursulaschneiderart@gmail.com Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/05/01/ursula-schneider/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

CW Mental health and depression This week’s guest is Andrew Pledger. Andrew has spent nearly his entire life in the Independent Fundamentalist Baptist Church—where the KJV rules and women do not. Andrew was homeschooled K-12 with a mildly white Christian nationalist curriculum, no sex education and no diverse friendships. For years, Andrew’s mental health suffered, but there were no resources for him. He was told that he wasn’t “reading the Bible enough” and “needed to get closer to God.” In college, Andrew knew he needed professional help but at a fundamentalist Christian college, there was only “biblical counseling”. The first two years were excruciating. Eventually, however, with a little community and a lot of research, Andrew took his mental health into his own hands. He started asking difficult questions about the Bible, and it was not long before the foundations began to crumble. Since leaving Christianity, Andrew has lived out secular grace. He is spreading awareness about toxic religion and working toward becoming a religious trauma therapist. His personal experience of freedom compels him to help others find the same freedom. Links Instagram https://www.instagram.com/4ndrewpledger/ Josh Harris Interview https://www.instagram.com/tv/Ca–9vFAxqs/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Photo Series https://www.instagram.com/4ndrewpledger/guide/religious-trauma-photo-series/17999363926411608/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Website https://4ndrewpledger.mypixieset.com Link aggregator https://liinks.co/4ndrewpledger Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/04/24/andrew-pledger-religious-trauma-awareness/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Robert Peoples of Affinis Humanity. Robert grew up in a Black Baptist church in New Jersey. When he was young, he enjoyed church but was an inquisitive child with many questions and no satisfying answers. As a teenager, Robert looked for answers outside the church—from Thomas Paine to Allah to the Buddha. By 18 years old, Robert could no longer believe in anything supernatural. His understanding of the world came from philosophy, history and science. This was incredibly difficult for his family, but they continued to faithfully love and support him. One frustration Robert has with the Black church community is that it works to change unjust systems but then uses phrases like, “We couldn’t have done this without God.” In recent years, Robert has been working with a political non-profit to ensure the “separation of state and church” and to change unjust policies. Human suffering is caused less by individuals “in need of heart change,” and more by systemic racism, homophobia, classism and other inequities. [Humanism] has increased my love for humanity exponentially. I no longer love people with conditions. In the midst of all the work to be done, Robert is hopeful. He is effecting change in the world and reminding others that “being human is enough.” He stands in awe of the beauty of nature, his daughters and this short life. His story is one of world-changing secular grace. Links Affinis Humanity https://www.affinishumanity.org/ Secular Coalition for Arizona https://secularaz.org/ Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/04/10/robert-peoples-affinis-humanity/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Luke J. Janssen, M.Sc., Ph.D., M.T.S., Professor Emeritus, Dept. Medicine, McMaster University, and co-host of the Recovering Evangelicals podcast. He is a scientist in medical research. During a faith crisis he began taking courses on theology which turned into an M.T.S degree. Luke tells his story in four 15 year phases: his early years as a nominal Reformed Christian, his young adulthood as a Pentecostal/Charismatic fundamentalist, a desconstruction phase, and where he is now, with a “small part of him that won’t let go” and a belief in a creative force. Luke and his co-host, Boyd Blundell, cover many aspects of desconstruction on the Recovering Evangelicals podcast. They discuss various apologetic and scientific arguments and honestly reveal what they do an do not believe now and why. Links Website https://lukejjanssen.wordpress.com/ Recovering Evangelicals https://lukejjanssen.wordpress.com/recovering-evangelicals/ Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/04/03/luke-janssen-recovering-evangelicals/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s Deconversion Anonymous guest is Bethany. Bethany grew up in the Pacific Northwest, attending an Assemblies of God church. It was an insular experience of their brand of Christianity against the world. The older Bethany got, the scarier the church doctrines—eternal torment, losing one’s salvation, the Apocalypse, faith healing that doesn’t always work and even demons under her bed. Bethany was a conscientious and sensitive teen. She ardently believed what she was taught and would believe even if it led to martyrdom. In college, Bethany got exposed to reformed theology and progressive Christianity. She began to think, “There is no, ‘God says,’ or ‘Scripture says.’ These are all interpretations.” After college, Bethany moved to California. She immediately joined a church, but it wasn’t the same. She was no longer tied to it the way she had been; she finally had space to think for herself. In California, Bethany’s been able to think, hike, read and realize who she is without outside influence, but it hasn’t been easy. She’s been afraid and uncertain, still haunted by some of her old beliefs. But she is free and life is full even while she is still “in process.” Book Recommendations #PaidAmazonLinks Untamed by Glennon Doyle https://amzn.to/3IHW945 Educated by Tara Westover https://amzn.to/3tHRif2 Wayward by Alice Greczyn https://amzn.to/3JHKFi5 Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion My interviews with Alice Greczyn https://gracefulatheist.com/2021/01/31/alice-greczyn-wayward/ https://gracefulatheist.com/2019/07/25/alice-greczyn-dare-to-doubt/ Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/03/27/bethany-deconversion-anonymous/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/ Picture of Mt. Rainier by Bethany

This week’s guest is April Ajoy, viral Tiktok’r, youTuber and podcaster. She is a “recovering conservative humorously detoxing religion.” April had a unique childhood. She was homeschooled and spent half of each year in Pentacostal spaces and the other half traveling the US with her family, singing and evangelizing. Her parents were evangelists and her grandfather was a pastor of a megachurch, so even as a young person April had seen cracks in the traditions and beliefs. She didn’t see them as systemic, though, only random, separate incidents. Over the next decade, tragedy hits April’s family and God does not step in to thwart it, a family member comes out to her and she realizes she cannot continue believing much of what white Christianity has painted as “good news”. Today, much of April’s childhood beliefs have been dissected and thrown out, but she is loving others in a much deeper way. She still considers herself a Christian and is fighting injustices in her own creative way. “Humor is how I cope with trauma.” On social media, April tackles all the difficult subjects—white supremacy, misogyny, purity culture, the absurd things evangelicals post online and more! She brings levity and fun to serious topics in a way that will make you laugh out and that is good medicine. Links TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@aprilajoy Instagram https://www.instagram.com/aprilajoy/ Twitter https://twitter.com/aprilajoyr Evangelicalish on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/c/Evangelicalish Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/03/20/april-ajoy-evangelicalish/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This is the three year anniversary of the Graceful Atheist Podcast. Thank you to everyone who has listened and participated. Special thanks to Mike T and Arline for their work on the podcast over the past year. This week’s guest is Ryan Mulkowsky. Ryan grew up Independent Fundamentalist Baptist. He made a “profession of faith” when he was nine years old and was reading Christian apologetics before he was twelve. By fourteen, Ryan was “licensed” by the church and started teaching. Ryan’s mental health suffered during adolescence. Whether at home, school or church, no place was safe for him to grow and change—strict dress codes, young-earth creationism, white-centered history books and virtually no sexual education. Ryan went to one university that was even more conservative and strict than his high school, left and graduated from another with a degree in apologetics. But Ryan knew he wanted to be with people. Soon Ryan was introduced to healthcare chaplaincy. For the first time, seeing people up-close in great physical and emotional need. He was also introduced to other religious faiths—Buddhism Orthodox Judaism and progressive Christianity. Ryan is a now a secular humanist, married with a family and working as a grief coordinator for Hospice. His life has both meaning and purpose without religion. He is living out secular grace by  providing comfort and peace in some of humanity’s most vulnerable moments. Links Blog https://www.ryanmulkowsky.com/ Twitter http://twitter.com/ryanmulkowsky Instagram http://instagram.com/ryanmulkowsky Some Random Thoughts Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/some-random-thoughts/id1523342430 Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/10/13/ryan-mulkowsky-some-random-thoughts/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Marla Taviano, author of Unbelieve: Poems on the Journey to Becoming a Heretic. Marla grew up in Middle America and moved across the globe and back, searching for God’s will for her life. She grew up in a loving home and didn’t realize she was in a “white Christian bubble.” Her church was almost all-white, her hometown was almost completely white, and then after high school, Marla attended an even smaller completely white, conservative Christian college. Marla’s first inkling that something was missing came when she read the book, The Hole in Our Gospel. She had read the Bible many, many times over the years, and here was a new revelation—2,000+ verses about helping the poor? four-letter words if you’ve never lived inside / the bubble of evangelical Christianity it / might surprise you to find that l-o-v-e / and p-o-o-r were new and controversial subjects for me / at age 35 Less than a decade later, while she and her family were part of a multiethnic church plant, Marla began to see more “holes” in her Christianity, namely racism and white supremacy. Her eyes were slowly beginning to open. Since 2015, Marla has been back and forth to Cambodia, written a book of poetry, started an incredibly popular bookstagram, been through a painful divorce, connected tons of people to one another and is still sharing her knowledge and wisdom with her followers. In her search for truth, Marla asks often, “Is this loving to my neighbor?” She may not be certain what her beliefs are right now, but she does believe that love is what will change the world. Links Amazon Paid Links Unbelieve: Poems on the Journey to Becoming a Heretic https://amzn.to/3sLNpoR Instagram https://www.instagram.com/marlataviano/ https://www.instagram.com/whitegirllearning/ Twitter https://twitter.com/marlataviano Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/03/06/marla-taviano-unbelieve/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Meghan Crozier, the writer behind The Pursuing Life blog and co-host of Thereafter Podcast. Meghan grew up in an Evangelical Free church and she was all in. After high school, she went to a christian university, signing a pledge to become a missionary. Her life turned out differently, and though it took years to be okay with that, she is now extremely thankful she never became a missionary. At the beginning of the pandemic while so much was changing in everyone’s lives, she clung to her faith. She journaled, prayed for an hour and read her bible every morning. Since 2020, she began to see other aspects of her church that she could not unsee—homophobia, gaslighting, ableism. Then the January 6th insurrection happened. After her church’s response to this disturbing event, Meghan knew she had to reconsider almost everything her life. Meghan now holds her Christianity very loosely. She’s found community and connection online through Twitter, and through her blog and podcast. Meghan is an important voice in the deconstruction world, influencing people with the spoken and written word. Links Twitter https://twitter.com/thepursuinglife https://twitter.com/thereafterpod The Pursuing Life https://www.thepursuinglife.com/ Thereafter Podcast https://linktr.ee/thereafterpod Prog/Post Xian Deconstruction Coffee Hour 6 AM PST / 9 AM EST on Twitter Spaces Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group https://www.facebook.com/groups/deconversion Full episode show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/02/27/meghan-crozier-prog-post-christian-deconstruction/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Deconstruction https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/#deconstruction/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is the Nigerian podcaster, The Ranting Atheist. He grew up in a strict Pentacostal church where his parents were ministers. At home, his parents were tough on him and his brothers, and made sure they attended Christian schools, even into university. While TRA was in university, following all the rules, his parents parents were rising in the ranks of their church. All was well until “church politics” got them. After that, his parents’ health began to decline, but TRA was still a believer. But as years passed and Nigeria suffered an economic recession, TRA’s faith in the Christian God started to wane. Between conversations about the Bible with a friend, Youtuber DarkMatter2525 and a false prophet in his church, many seeds of doubt were planted. As an atheist, TRA wanted to find a way to assist other Nigerian atheists. His podcast The Ranting Atheist has been the perfect tool. Every weekend a new episode is released “to let Nigerian atheists know that they are not crazy and they are not alone.” TRA is living out graceful atheism one podcast episode at a time. Links The Ranting Atheist Podcast https://www.podpage.com/TRAtheist/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/tratheistpod/ Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group! Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Jeffrey Caldwell. Jeffrey grew up in Lancaster county, PA in a liberal denomination set in a conservative area. As a child, church was okay; it was filled with the usual things—bible crafts in Sunday school and singing in the choir. His family was “quasi-religious.” It was good for children to have morals, but no one was pressured to believe anything. Jeffrey had doubted whether Christianity was real throughout middle school. Neither his parents nor his siblings took it very seriously. He left church in high school but was still searching for meaning. Music, books and movies filled the space that religion often does. Eventually, his interest expanded to include philosophy, politics, social justice, all influenced by the “oldies” his dad played in the car. In his twenties, Jeffrey struggled with mental health issues and after a surprise encounter with church, he knew he was missing community. He didn’t fit in with the traditional religions, so he tried the UU church. Then he got involved in progressive politics and social justice, and eventually went to seminary. In seminary, Jeffrey became a chaplain. Now, Jeffrey has created a thriving online and in-person community, Connections Humanist Community. Each week, people share stories and conversations. They belong to a  community where they are valued and heard. Jeffrey is living out what it means to be a “graceful atheist.” Links Connections Humanist Community https://www.meetup.com/connections-humanist-community/ Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group! Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s episode is Natalie. Natalie grew up in a traditional Christian household, one of six kids. Living in the South and attending a Southern Baptist church most of her childhood and adolescence, however, left a bad taste in her mouth. One place she found solace? Books. Natalie was an avid reader from a young age and reading authors like Judy Blume opened her eyes to a whole good and happy world outside of her Christian bubble. Fictional, though it was, that world made her wonder, “How can [my family] be so unhappy and still have these beliefs about this religion?” Natalie escaped the South at seventeen for a few years and began seriously examining her childhood faith. Even as she was questioning her beliefs, she still lived amidst the family chaos, a daily reminder that she needed to escape again. Eventually, after a quick and clandestine wedding, she and her husband moved away. It’s been a while since Natalie deconverted, and she has lived a fulfilling life, with both happy times and hard times. Today, seeing those who are deconstructing their faith, she empathizes deeply . Author Recommendations Judy Blume Grace Livingston Hill Interact Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

"Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/ "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/ This week’s episode is Matt Oxley. Matt has what he calls a “Bapti-costal” background—mainstream Southern Baptist with “some extra flair and drama.” At six, he was saved, by thirteen he was “hardcore about faith” and by high school, his beliefs were his whole world. However, when he was nineteen he left church over doctrinal issues, for a called it a “sabbatical” and took a few years to genuinely examine his convictions. He knew he had to believe the “cardinal doctrines,” if he was to accept all the other beliefs. But how much could he see was wrong and still ignore it? He was no longer one hundred percent sure he believed in God, much less Christianity, and it didn’t feel like God was doing anything to help him believe. Eventually he admitted to himself that he was an atheist. At first, he became an “anti-apologist,” spreading a different gospel, but over time he has found a balance. Now that eternal retribution is no longer a possibility, Matt holds his beliefs lightly. He is able to parlay with both Christians and humanists, asking hard questions and stirring up all kinds of discussion—Biblical history, Jesus versus Paul, fundamentalism, capitalism, sexuality, and more. Today, Matt’s gospel is love. He no longer believes in a god or in struct doctrines, but he is optimistic about the church’s future. He’s influencing it for the better, once kind and hard conversation at a time. Links Raging Rev https://ragingrev.com/ Pastor With No Answers https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pastor-with-no-answers-and-friends-podcast/id1046402610 Interact Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Judah. Judah grew up “Church of God, Pentecostal adjacent,” where Judah’s father was convinced, “God is alive in these people.” By eight years old, Judah was speaking in tongues and absorbed into eschatology—the study of the end times. Around ten, at a more “separatist” church, the family started homeschooling. His church and family were convinced they were right and everyone else was wrong. Answers in Genesis was the science curriculum, but Judah was also exposed to science on public television. As a teen, another pillar began to crack. Judah believed his attraction to guys and girls was sinful. It felt like God was two opposing forces—one god you lean into for love and grace, the other shames and condemns you. Judah doubled down on young earth creationism and repressing his sexual attractions and dove deeper into eschatology. The family’s eschatology changed over time, but 2012 was the year the end of the world would come. Eventually 2012 comes and 2012 goes. This undid Judah. He spends the next three years learning what else was not true, debunking creationism, conspiracies and various theological matters. Judah was a more liberal Christian for a while but eventually science and logic led him to become an agnostic atheist. He came out with his beliefs to his family in dramatic fashion and hasn’t looked back. His future is in his own hands and whether his family takes responsibility for their beliefs and actions during his childhood is in theirs. He now lives a life true to himself and his own values and ethics. Links Judah’s blog https://jmedic.medium.com/ Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group! Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Will from Heretical Theology. Will grew up in a Methodist church until high school, when he began attending youth group in what he now calls the, “cult church.”  Years later, will he and his wife were still at that church, he would have a seemingly supernatural experience at his brother’s church in Florida. The decide to move, and not only was there a megachurch waiting for them, there was also Disney World! Will and his wife dove right in! They served at the megachurch for about five years when his wife began to doubt her beliefs. Eventually, Will resigned himself to being alone in his faith. Slowly, however, Will’s fundamentalist beliefs shifted. He wanted to understand the Bible better, so he could understand his wife better. He decided to take off his “Jesus colored glasses,” and read the Bible differently. It wasn’t long before he had a number of issues with what he was reading. Then enters the Republican nomination of Donald Trump. Will felt like he was in the “twilight zone,” not understanding how Christians were getting behind Trump. He and his wife stopped going to the main services but were still in small group. The pastor met with Will to discuss “ministry,” but instead Will needed to pour out all his questions and concerns. The pastor dismissed them. It may not have been intentional, but it still hurt. A few months later, he knew he no longer believed. Today, Will uses Instagram to share what’s learned from the Bible. “I know some shit about the Bible, and I would like to put that to some good use.” He’s taking the “decades of useless Bible knowledge” he has to teach and challenge people, in hopes that his followers will outgrow him and move on to do amazing things. Recommendations: Sam Harris (books & podcast) Bart Ehrman (books & classes on Wondrium) Paulogia (YouTube) Yuval Noah Harari (Books: Homo Deus, 21 lessons for the 21st century & Sapiens) Links Instagram https://www.instagram.com/heretical_theology/ Am I happier? https://www.instagram.com/p/CXM4sStrey2/ Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group! Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s returning guest is Carlene! She grew up in the Independent Church of Christ—a cappella music, wholly male leadership, baptism before heaven and Biblical inerrancy. One church teaching that took up too much emotional energy was the constant push to be baptized. She was told, “you’ll feel so much better when you do it. You’ll feel so clean.” But it felt inauthentic to publicly say, “I’m a sinner,” when she didn’t feel like that was true. Carlene’s home life was similar to church life—patriarchal, authoritarian, traditional and conservative. Carlene was an obedient child who did not question authority, so she remembers a healthy, happy childhood. Her two sisters, however, remember profoundly different childhoods. In high school, Sunday school lessons were always about “staying pure.” Her boyfriend started going to church with her. They followed the rules and were eventually baptized at the same time. It wasn’t long, however, before Carlene’s beliefs would become real to her. Carlene’s boyfriend went into the military and was sent to Afghanistan. She prayed and prayed for his safety, and at the time it seemed like he returned home safely. They got married and have been married for ten years. Over time, however, they have learned that there are both visible wounds and invisible. While in college, Carlene first learned about evolution. It was this plus friends coming out as gay, working as a police detective and eventually the election of Donald Trump that, over many years, made her question again and again what she had always been taught. It was “the death of a thousand cuts,” and it took almost a decade, but Carlene is now an atheist who finds a glorious sense of awe and wonder in nature without Christian beliefs “taking up space and living rent-free” in her mind. Interact Join the Deconversion Anonymous Facebook group! Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Attribution "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/

This week’s guest is Derek Webb, musician, song writer and public deconstructor. For 10 years, Derek was a member of the Christian rock band, Caedmon’s Call. He then went on to a solo career where he focused on self reflection in his art. During that time, Derek began to desconstruct. He did so publicly in his music and on social media. For Derek’s Fingers Crossed album, “the tale of two divorces,” Derek made himself available to his audience for criticism. He and his team turned this into the podcast, The Airing of Grief. What could have been a public expression of anger and hostility at Derek’s change of heart, wound up being people describing their own deconstruction. It was a poignant reminder that we are not alone in this process. Derek’s next album, Targets, is a joyous and rebellious rock celebration of deconstruction. Derek’s current project, The Jesus Hypothesis, takes a second look at his former theological beliefs. For this project, Derek has made himself even more available to his audience by live streaming the writing and recording process for his Patreon supporters. Derek is the perfect guest for the podcast as his art, music and personal style exemplify an both honesty contest and Secular Grace. Links Derek’s Website https://www.derekwebb.com/ The Airing Of Grief https://www.theairingofgrief.com/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/derekwebb/ Patreon https://patreon.com/derekwebb Interact Full show notes https://gracefulatheist.com/2022/01/02/derek-webb-the-jesus-hypothesis/ Is it just that I had the wrong image of god? https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/11/17/is-it-just-that-i-had-the-wrong-image-of-god/ The Bubble https://gracefulatheist.com/2018/01/15/the-bubble/ Deconversion https://gracefulatheist.com/2017/12/03/deconversion-how-to/ Secular Grace https://gracefulatheist.com/2016/10/21/secular-grace/ Attribution Transition music by Derek Webb from the Fingers Crossed album "Waves" track written and produced by Makaih Beats https://makaihbeats.net/