Grief Uncensored Podcast
By Julia Gallegos + Yako Shirasuna
linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
Grief Uncensored PodcastOct 13, 2022
S 3 Ep 7: Answering Your Grief Questions! (Q + A)
S 3 Ep 6: Giving Condolences Is Still So Hard (Minisode)
We still struggle to place our emotions and express them correctly. We struggle to know what we need sometimes, and how to communicate something we don't even know ourselves. When another loss occurs, we will probably struggle to find the right words to say to another griever even when deep down we know the ones we would want to hear. We know first hand that the best condolences are action-based, and not words. Just by you having “survived” grief, you are a comfort to someone.
Just because we know grief DOES NOT make us experts!
S 3 Ep 5: Your Grief is Your Own & Grieving on Social Media
Join us this week on Grief Uncensored as we dive into the meaning of the phrase we always say in the beginning of our episodes - your grief is your own. We'll also dive into the complex world of social media and its impact throughout all the stages of the grieving process. Social media and it’s endless stream of information, people, interactions, proves to be one of our biggest triggers, but also our best resource.
No two grief stories are ever the same, even when grieving the same person within the same family. Everybody deals with it differently, and whatever you do, however you cope and process your grief, is 100% valid. As a griever, vulnerability, although scary, can be so rewarding. Sharing your story with others is a powerful tool that can help people close to you understand who you are. We hold a lot of power in our storytelling, and it is a tool for healing. If sharing is something you want to do, we believe you should do it with confidence. But we’ve all been there: you decide to share some details or stories about your journey, just to be met with blank stares and awkward silences.
In this episode, we discuss the importance of choosing the right confidants for your grief journey and why it's perfectly okay to keep some aspects of your experience private. here's the truth: you don't owe anyone an explanation for your grief. It's yours to carry, yours to process, and yours to share - on your own terms. Feeling like you're "too much" or burdening others with your pain is a common struggle. But we're here to remind you that you are worthy of love and understanding, no matter the depth of your grief or the "baggage" you carry.
S 3 Ep 4: Closure: Redefining Acceptance and "Moving On" (Minisode)
When we talk about closure, it doesn't just mean with the person we lost. We also talk about finding closure with everything we experienced: the loss, the guilt, the anger, the trauma, and all the other unresolved feelings.
Do we need to accept our realities to find closure? What if we didn’t get to say goodbye, or be with them in their final moments? Do we really need closure to move on, or is it a societal expectation that adds unnecessary weight to the grieving process?
Come join us this week as we try to answer these questions surrounding this concept of closure. In a culture that often urges us to "move on," we acknowledge that grief has its own timeline. Instead of pushing for closure, we explore how time itself becomes a crucial factor in healing wounds and finding a sense of peace.
S 3 Ep 3: Navigating Grief in Your 20’s (Minisode)
In this week's minisode, we confront the whirlwind of existential thoughts and questions that come with being in your 20 somethings. As 20-somethings, we are trying on so many different hats, exploring new paths, and choosing & changing our minds a million times. How scary of a thought is it to realize you have to power to make decisions that will impact your life? And how do we deal with the impact of situations that were out of our control? Trying to figure out your identity and place in this world is hard enough, then adding grief & loss on top of that is a while other thing. Talk about feeling lost! Join us as we talk about how losing a parent at this young age, amid self discovery, changes EVERYTHING.
We discuss the void that created is so massive it impacts who we are & who we will become. It's okay to question why we're here, why these things happen, and what we would be like if they hadn't. It's okay not to have all the answers and have everything figured out. It's okay to take risks, try new things, and learn from failures along the way. Embracing the uncertainty and understanding that plans may not always unfold as expected are all part of the journey.
Experiencing the profound impact of a life-altering loss only adds another layer of complexity to this transformative time.
S 3 Ep 2: New Year, Same Grief (Minisode)
In this episode, we dive headfirst into the unfiltered emotions surrounding the holidays. We share our personal experiences with no holding back when it comes to acknowledging that, yeah, the holidays can downright suck when faced with the empty chair at the table and the missing laughter of a loved one.
As we approach the New Year, the passage of time hits differently for grievers. We discuss the bittersweet reality of bidding farewell to one year and bracing for the unknowns of the next. New Year's has become a painful reminder of the relentless passage of time and acknowledging the changes in our lives since our losses. We explore ways to cope during the holiday season and share personal insights on setting intentions for the upcoming year with mindfulness.
Join us for another genuine and heartfelt conversation about the realities of grief during this holiday season.
S 3 Ep 1: Third Year of Grief
Welcome back to Season 3 of Grief Uncensored, the podcast where we navigate the uncharted waters of loss, pain, and healing. Your hosts, Julia Gallegos and Yako Shirasuna, are back after a much-needed hiatus.
During our break, we took the time to reflect, recharge, and analyze how this year will bring a different perspective to both our personal grief journeys and the podcast itself. Join us in this candid catch-up session as we share our experiences, the lessons we've learned, and how the landscape of grief has evolved in our lives.
Year 3 of grief has brought new challenges, unexpected twists, and, of course, moments of profound growth. We're here to lay it all out on the table, discussing the highs, the lows, and everything in between. It's an emotional journey, but we're not holding back. This season promises to be more honest, more vulnerable, and more comforting than ever before.
So grab your headphones, find a cozy spot, and join us as we embark on another season of Grief Uncensored. Let's navigate the complexities of grief together, finding solace in shared experiences and embracing the healing power of open, unfiltered conversation. Welcome to Season 3; we've missed you, and we can't wait to explore the depths of grief with you once again.
How to Listen & Welcome!
Thank you for joining us!
Follow us on Instagram @griefuncensoredpodcast & check out our YouTube for the video version of this podcast.
We're so glad you are here.
S 2 Ep 12: “Happy” Thanksgiving! (Grief Edition Minisode)
S 2 Ep 11: Grief Math, Grief Dreams & Using Imagination to Cope w/ Zane Landin
S 2 Ep 10: The Worst Time of The Year (Grief Edition Minisode)
This is one of our first minisodes. Stay tuned for more minisodes throughout the holiday season. As always, much love.
S 2 Ep 9: The Sh*t No One Talks About w/ Maddisen Brockmeyer
Watch the video version of this podcast on YouTube. Want to be a guest? Want to join our Facebook group for other grieving young adults? Want to submit your person for our "Feature of The Week" Instagram series? CLICK THE LINK BIO!! linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 2 Ep 8: Coping with Multiple Losses (Cumulative Grief) w/ Hanna Normandeau
Our guest this week, Hanna Normandeau, experienced the loss of her Dad, grandmother, and grandfather, all within an 8-month period. Hanna lays out her experience losing her dad tragically and traumatically to COVID-19, and shortly after losing her elderly grandparents more “naturally” but devastating nonetheless. We learn about how compounded grief feels overwhelming and creates longer periods of denial, how our grief looks differently depending on the relationship we had with the person while they were still on earth, and the intricacies of the effects of bereavement overload.
Watch the video version of this podcast on YouTube. Want to be a guest? Want to join our Facebook group for other grieving young adults? Want to submit your person for our "Feature of The Week" Instagram series? CLICK THE LINK BIO!! linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 2 Ep 7: Medical Aid in Dying, Death Doulas, & Green Burials w/ Sophia Bylsma
This week, we're joined by Sophia Bylsma as she shares her story about losing her mom to a neurodegenerative illness similar to ALS. She had a very unique experience where her mom chose to partake in the medical aid in dying process (formally known as physician-assisted suicide), which is only legal in a handful of states here in the U.S. This option allows those diagnosed with a terminal illness to have a say in the way they die, allowing them to take back some control in an uncontrollable situation. Also discussed in this episode are death doulas and alternative options to traditional funerals including green burials.
Watch the video version of this podcast on YouTube. Want to be a guest? Want to join our Facebook group for other grieving young adults? Want to submit your person for our "Feature of The Week" Instagram series? CLICK THE LINK BIO!! https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 2 Ep 6: Depression, Anxiety & Suicidal Thoughts (Grief-Induced)
World Mental Health Day is October 10th according to the World Health Organization. In honor of that, we dedicated this week's episode to mental health struggles through the lens of grief. For those of us who experience mental health struggles, we know how it feels to live in an unequal world. There is often a stigma and shame when it comes to mental illnesses. This episode is our attempt to normalize talking about the hard stuff. In this episode, we cover how grief changed our journey with mental health, how COVID-19 impacted mental health, derealization & depersonalization, and struggling with anxiety & depression. Lastly, we talk about the difference between suicidal ideation and thoughts and speak from the heart about wanting to end the pain.
Our goal is to normalize asking for help, going to therapy, having bad days (not everyday can be great), showing emotions, taking a break/not pushing your limits, not being ok (knowing it'll pass or come in waves), speaking up and telling people about your grief/depression/suicidal thoughts.
Resources:
If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts please call the Suicide and Crisis line 988 OR 1-800-273-8255 is the phone number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. You can also text “TALK” to the Crisis Text Line at 741741, a trained crisis counselor will receive it and respond within minutes.
- The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Call 1-800-273-8255.
- The Crisis Text Line: Text “TALK” 741741
- Nonprofits: LGBTQ resource The Trevor Project, National Alliance for Mental Health (NAMI), The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, International Association for Suicide Prevention - IASP
Health Care
- providers can be found through your primary care physician, employee assistance or school (many universities offer free mental health care)
- Apps such as Better Help, Talkspace, Cerebral, etc.
Podcasts
- Therapy Thoughts with Tiffany Roe
- Let’s Talk About Mental Health with Jeremy Godwin
Click the link below for more Grief Uncensored resources including our Facebook group for other young adults grieving a significant loss:
https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 2 Ep 5: Grieving With A Significant Other w/ Carson Drain
Being in a committed relationship while grieving isn’t for the weak. There are countless struggles couples have to endure. It’s possible that grief has affected your connection in a negative way, causing conflict. Or, it can bring a couple closer through trust. For the griever, feelings of guilt often rise from feeling depressed too often, trauma dumping, asking “too much” from their partner, etc.
This week, we’re here to break down these ideas with none other than the amazing Carson Drain (@carryonwithcarson on Instagram and TikTok). Alongside Carson, we share details about our experiences being in committed partnerships while our lives got torn apart.
We change too much in grief, and our partner is a big part of the journey. How can we navigate loving and supporting our partner if our cup is so empty? Join us for all things love and loss this week.
Carson Drain: https://linktr.ee/carsoncdrain
Watch the video version of this podcast on YouTube. Want to be a guest? Want to join our Facebook group for other grieving young adults? Want to submit your person for our "Feature of The Week" Instagram series? CLICK THE LINK BIO!!
https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 2 Ep 4: Going Back to "Normal"
How the f*** are we supposed to “go back to normal” after we have just experienced a life-changing loss? Our world stops yet, time keeps ticking away. The world keeps going on without us as we watch from the sidelines. Grievers are asked TOO often to put on a mask for the outside world and pretend everything is ok. Know that it’s normal to feel like a zombie or to numb-out on auto-pilot.
In this episode, we layout all the difficulties of having to go back to normal after the initial loss and provide 5 different tools to add to your “going back to normal” toolbox:
1. Be transparent with people who can be on your side.
2. Protect your peace by having a list of pre-written responses you can “copy and paste” when people ask you questions that are inconsiderate or ignorant.
3. Find how YOU like to self soothe: walks, yoga, etc.
4. Don’t feel guilty for choosing you & speaking your truth.
5. KNOW YOUR WORTH & that you deserve grace & space to heal.
Watch the video version of this podcast on YouTube. Want to be a guest? Want to join our Facebook group for other grieving young adults? Want to submit your person for our "Feature of The Week" Instagram series? CLICK THE LINK BIO!! https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 2 Ep 3: Anticipatory Grief w/ Michelle Caravella
This week, we had the pleasure of talking with soul-led RD and co-host of her own podcast (the Michelle and Lucy Show), Michelle Caravella. Having lost her dad to cancer, together we talked about anticipatory grief and the difficulties behind having to grieve someone while they're still alive. Anticipatory grief is grief that occurs before the death or loss, and it's just as complicated and confusing as you would think. It's often referred to as the "in-between place" as you face this reality of losing your loved one while trying to find the balance between holding on to hope and letting go. It commonly leaves one feeling completely helpless. Join us for another vulnerable conversation.
Watch the video version of this podcast on YouTube. Want to be a guest? Want to join our Facebook group for other grieving young adults? Want to submit your person for our "Feature of The Week" Instagram series? CLICK THE LINK BIO!!!
https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
Michelle Caravella
Instagram: michelle_caravella
S 2 Ep 2: Grief Catch-Up
Another life talk with your hosts, Julia and Yako. In this episode, we’re just catching up about all that’s happened since Season 1. We talk about the ever-changing nature of being in your 20’s while simultaneously dealing with the crushing weight of grief. Julia talks about moving to a new city and starting a new life, and Yako talks about visiting home and transitioning into adulthood. Also, we dive into how to deal with disappointment when people in your life fail to show up for you.
Watch the video version of this podcast on YouTube! Want to be a guest? Want to join our Facebook group for other grieving young adults? Want to participate in our "Feature Your Loved One" series on Instagram? CLICK THE LINK BELOW!! https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 2 Ep 1: Childhood Grief & Grief Over Time w/ Tessa Thompson
Welcome to Season 2 of Grief Uncensored! We’re back with more tears, more laughs, and some amazing new guests! This week, we’re with our friend, Tessa Thompson, who shares her story about losing her dad to cancer at the age of 12. Join us as we talk with her about grieving at such a young age and how grief changes over time. Stay tuned for more and the rest of Season 2!
https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 1 Ep 14: Laughing at the Funeral?
Funerals are the worst. They’re awkward, traumatic, and exhausting. Is there really any way to mentally prepare for one, especially one for your parent? *TRIGGER WARNING*: Today’s episode dives deep into certain details about our funeral experiences. Please don’t listen to this episode if this is a triggering topic for you. Additionally, as seen evidently in this episode and throughout our whole podcast, we use humor to cope with trauma so please do not think we are taking this topic lightly.
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S 1 Ep 13: Guilt
This episode we’re talking about feeling guilt after a loss. For us, this might’ve been the hardest episode to get through because this feeling has a huge impact on both of our lives. There’s so many different reasons one might feel guilt, so it’s hard to discuss them all because everyone’s loss and lives are vastly unique. However, no matter how the death occurred, as grievers, somehow we end up turning it back on ourselves and find reasons to blame ourselves. REMEMBER, guilt is a normal part of the grieving process. No one is perfect, we all make our mistakes. You are not a terrible person for making them. Finally, just because you feel guilty doesn’t mean you are.
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S 1 Ep 12: The Waves of Grief
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S 1 Ep 11: Holidays, Anniversaries, Birthdays, and Other “Big” Days
This week, we talk about how it feels on the “big” days without our person including holidays (e.g. Christmas, Thanksgiving, Mother’s/Father’s Day), birthdays, death anniversaries, and more. The first holiday season is always horrible, but that’s not to say that their absence ever goes away. Other days like death anniversaries, birthdays, and New Years force us to acknowledge how much time has passed which is extremely painful too. Overall, people assume grief is the worst on these stand out days, however, grief lives in the everyday and sometimes the smaller, more normal days hurt the most.
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S 1 Ep 10: Anger and Resentment
While we have discussed feelings of extreme sadness and isolation associated with grief in past episodes, accompanying anger and resentment are feelings that are more often overlooked. Today, we talk about how normal it is to feel anger after a loss: angry at the world for taking your person away, angry at the people around you for not understanding, and angry at yourself for not being able to do things you normally would before the loss.
https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 1 Ep 9: Listen to This if the Loss Is Fresh
This episode, we're having a heart to heart directly with you: the ones who have been profoundly impacted by loss. These are the words we wish were said to us in the early days of our grief... words that we would've wanted to hear. When we say "early", please know that there is no specific time frame for how a loss feels to you. Whether that's years, months, or days is completely up to you. If you resonate with this title or description, please listen to this because this episode was meant for you.
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S 1 Ep 8: Life Beyond the Physical Dimension
In this episode, we take a deep dive into life after death. We speculate how concepts created by religion and spirituality are seen through the lens of grief. It can bring up A LOT of complicated feelings. We want to believe our loved ones are still “alive” somewhere. They talk to us through our dreams and even send signs to earth for us. Ultimately, we don’t have answers to life’s big questions. No one does. When we talk about having existential crisis… this is what we mean.
Topics discussed: What are the differences between spirituality and religion? How does spirituality and religion help us in grief, and/or how does it make us feel worse? Where do our loved ones go? Can they interact with us in our daily lives? Is that really them sending us signs? Mediumship? Reincarnation?
https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 1 Ep 7: Answering Your Grief Questions! (Q+A)
We wanted to do things a little differently this week and take this opportunity as a chance for you guys to get to know us a little better. In this episode, we answer some questions from viewers submitted through Instagram and our Google Form, and just sit and talk to you guys about our grief journey, our friendship, and our opinion on certain grief-related topics.
https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 1 Ep 6: Grief Brain & Finishing College
Grief Brain is like severe brain fog, but it’s caused by emotional trauma: you’re confused, forgetful, having memory loss, can’t access certain words or names, etc. In this episode, we explore WHY grief brain happens and how your brain reacts to the loss. Using facts and figures from authors and doctors Mary-Frances O'Connor and Lisa Shulmann, we explain that after a loss, the brain is fundamentally altered. Since the brain is interconnected, like a web, the rerouting or destruction of brain connections that occurs after a loss, makes it harder to access information or perform simple tasks. We learned that the brain doesn’t differentiate between grief and emotional trauma. Having grief brain while trying to finish college was a struggle, and we cover everything from telling our professors, to group projects, and graduation.
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S 1 Ep 5: Grief-Induced Anxiety and Triggers
We’re back after a much needed mental break. This week we’re diving into one of the most difficult topics: Grief-induced anxiety and potential triggers. Prominent losses in our lives create big changes in a short amount of time, creating a surge in our feelings of chaos and fear. When big life changes come out of no where, we feel like we aren’t safe or in control, bringing forth a fear of the unknown and uncontrollable. We often ask ourselves who we might lose next, will this be the last goodbye, or will I have to accept the same cancer diagnosis one day? There is no rationalizing with your anxious thoughts, and you can’t just “talk yourself out of it.” We get it.
https://linktr.ee/griefuncensoredpodcast
S 1 Ep 4: How to ACTUALLY Help A Grieving Friend
Are you willing to have the uncomfortable, dark, and sometimes awkward conversation that comes with confronting grief? In this week’s episode, we’re here to discuss some of the ways you can help your grieving friend. This means going beyond the clichéd post-loss lines like “don’t hesitate to reach out” or “I can only imagine what you’re going through.” Not only do we debunk these common phrases and talk about what not to do, we follow up with important ways you can actually support your grieving friend after a loss.
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S 1 Ep 3: The Storm Continues (Secondary Loss Pt. 2)
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S 1 Ep 2: When It Rains, It Pours (Secondary Loss Pt. 1)
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