Cooped Up - Sh!t Cooper Says

I **FINALLY** got my colonoscopy results and wanted to share the details with you, including the ridiculous experience at the doctor's office to learn the news.
Also, updates on Christmas decorating and my last week as a 48 year old.

LINKS:

Wireless Hot Glue Gun: https://amzn.to/3RvDe44

Well, it was bound to happen...I finally paid my first visit to the plastic surgeon today. It's not what you think, but I'll tell you all about it. Also, last night we had some trick-or-treaters kick our front door in!

Let's talk colonoscopies. Yes, THAT. It's an important topic, particularly for the age group of people who follow me. But (butt?), it's also hilarious if you really think about it! I had mine yesterday, and boy howdy, do I have some observations. You'll laugh, you'll cringe, and you'll definitely say "oh, Cooper, TMI" at least a few times.

We went to a party over the weekend and someone I never expected to watch my social knew all the details. Todd was impressed that I have a fan!

Y'all, it's October! Event season is back!

I ran to Target earlier today with Claire (on her last day of Fall break). Two outcomes: It was not cheap, and I'm obviously a sucker. Also, if you have tickets to P!nk tonight and haven't already heard the news...yikes. I'll share my similar story.

Yesterday was a challenge -- by about 8 a.m., I was already ready to read people to filth, Julia Sugarbaker-style. But today's been a better day!

Y'all, I earned my "parent of the year" badge this weekend...if being parent of the year means blaming your kid for years that something was their fault only to discover it was really my own. Also, I'm experiencing a full-on vaccine hangover. It's just like a regular hangover, except you get all the nausea but none of the fun beforehand!

The official first day of Fall may not be until next week, but it might as well be here already. I'm in the official "Fall in North Texas" uniform today: a sweater because I'm chilly, but still wearing shorts and flip flops!

Also, I have to tell you about the self esteem boost I got while buying booze at Tom Thumb yesterday.

The amount of time that I've spent in the car this week is a surprise even to me! School commute and sports have turned me into an Uber for my children.

Just when I thought we'd settled into a new back to school routine, a flex schedule pops up!

Potentially the most obvious and unoriginal thing I could talk about today -- THIS HEAT! OMG, it's making people crazy!

In a surprise turn of events, sports are a hot topic in the Koch household -- and I'm now a "Sports Dad." Who'd have ever seen that coming? Also, can we talk about Lizzo?!

Hope you had a great weekend! Crazy week here - including a flight to and drive back from Iowa in my near future. This'll be my only broadcast for the week.

It's Barbie Weekend! We'll be there tomorrow...in pink, of course.

Let's get this week wrapped up! How in the world does a 4-day week ever feel like it's been 8 days long?!

If there's one thing I can say about the past few days, it's that my eyes have been drained of every possible tear they could cry. All good cries, but still. Daddy needed a Gatorade after the graduation!

Anyone who's been around me long enough knows that two types of memories: those that I could tell you every single smell, sound and transcript; and those I have no recollection of at all. There's a method to my forgetfulness though.

This hail is getting insane! Even crazier are the descriptions that the weather folks are giving it.

I woke up this morning at 5:30 and went for a two-mile walk. I have no idea why. LOL! Also, this weekend we did lots of travel planning for the coming months.

Y'all, we made it to Friday! This long-ass week was, well, long. Nothing particularly bad about it. I just felt like it would never end!

Y'all, last week was so much fun that I gained SIX POUNDS! I'm as surprised about it as you are...but not really when I think about all the things I ate and drank and ate and drank. 😁

When a Koch tells you that it's going to be an "easy" day or that "we're going to take it easy," do not believe them! It simply means the weekend is going to be less back-breaking than normal. They loves them some manual labor!

Tina has left the earthly plane for somewhere more fantastic. We were lucky to have her while we could.

The kids are out of town this week on a school trip to New Orleans. What's in store for the temporary empty nesters?! Probably nowhere near as exciting as anyone might think.

Can we talk about Martha Stewart on Sports Illustrated's "Swimsuit Edition?" I'm obsessed!

We made it back from Mexico last night: our adventure included singing flight attendants (the kids weren't impressed), Todd thinking that Claire and I were going to be kidnapped and have our organs harvested (they wouldn't have gotten far with mine), the bellhop not comprehending how two men wouldn't need two rooms and tetanus.

Anyone else feel like this week kicked them in the nuts (or ovaries) over and over and over again? Glad to put it to bed and fly off to Mexico for a week at the beach!

My day is so busy that it's 4:30 and I'm only halfway done! HELP! Also, some exciting vacation news!

The storms last night wreaked havoc on my sleep. Normally I sleep through them, but Mother Nature had other plans with this late night visit. I can barely keep my eyes open today!

This week started off with a bang! And Monday still isn't done -- we hav e a junior roller derby info session this evening.

Nothing prepares you for the stench of death, particularly when it's trapped in the wall. Ugh. Welcome to my day(s)!

Recapping my crazy-busy weekend, which included my first pickleball tournament, a Roaring Twenties charity event and getting the results of my MRI!

Two firsts today: first time in scrubs and first time to have an MRI. I don't think it went like most people's do. I'll explain.

Did you know that "time and temp" phone lines still exist and one here locally is about to disconnect...to the outrage of some.

We nearly hit 100 today...on April 3rd. The "first summer" is officially upon us! Also, recapping our roller derby experience this weekend and how super fun it is shopping for a 14-year-old girl's bathing suit.

Gabbing with my BFF Kerrie about Adele, modern dating, brain cancer, the best bread I've ever eaten and why I've never done drugs. Yep, it's one of those conversations! Enjoy!

Y'all - Have you ever not known that something exists and then when you learn about it, the universe conspires to make sure you can't live without it? That's happened to me...with a pair (or two) of shoes.

Today was everyone's first full day back at school and work in two weeks...and boy, howdy, are we beat! My ambitious dinner plans may have to wait.

We're back from the first week of Spring Break -- and my work inbox made sure I knew it wasn't happy with me. Also, I have an update on Mason's high school applications and where he's going next year!

The US government is on the brink of banning TikTok because they believe it poses a security risk to Americans. That may be so, but I think the real danger is its ability to get stupid songs stuck in my head!

I'm a terrible napper. I dozed off for about 20 minutes after picking the kids up from school and now everyone hates me...for good reason; I'm a terrible person after a quick snooze!

We had an exceptionally active weekend. Our big gay garage sale, pretending we were Mario Andretti and a late-night trip to the ER combined to make it more active than I like. I need a weekend to recover from my weekend! All on today's Cooped Up Live: Shit Cooper Says!

It appears that we've officially left "Texas Winter" and its ice storms behind us, and now we're entering "Texas Spring," complete with doomsday weather forecasts about Wizard of Oz-worth tornadoes and baby-head-sized hail. Also, Claire got major bank for her birthday and we have some preliminary high school news for Mason. All on today's Cooped Up Live: Shit Cooper Says!

One of the newest 14-year-olds in all the land -- my sweet Claire -- is joining me today to talk about her birthday and what 14-year-olds wish adults understand.

I woke up feeling like...well, crap...this morning. I'm a little better, but still sort of low energy. And we have so much to get done this weekend in prep for our big gay garage sale next weekend.

Y'all, I'm not as good at pickleball as I thought. Yesterday evening, I played for the first time with non-beginners...and it wasn't pretty. But at least I was! LOL! Also, why shopping with Claire is the worst and how I solved that problem.

Back after a whirlwind 48-hour trip out to LA to see our new nephew. And we even managed to cram in a few tourist attractions!

Todd and I (with the kids) are flying out to L.A. this weekend to see our new nephew for the first time! But first, I have a to-do list a mile long to work through. 

I'm talking mostly today about movies and shows that we're watching and/or that I'm excited about coming out!