The Lawn Boiz
By George and John and Ian and Sig
The Lawn BoizOct 02, 2020
Deodorant Blues
The Boiz discuss morning routines and get into character.
Pope or Nope!
The boys test their knowledge on baseball, papal names, Futball, and Olympic Atheletes. Sigmund should have won
The Orchard Guys
Take a walk through the orchard with these four fruity guys as they discuss finance in the 1500s, automobiles, and crown the GOAT fruit.
R U SMRTer than a JOHN!
The gang gets back to-get-her one last time before heading off to their doom. John reaches Nirvana, George gets trapped inside a heart-shaped box, Ian pilots a Stone Temple, and Sig just does what he does best.
Let's Get Retired
George hosts this episode in which the boys imagine their retirement. Sig, Ian, and John remind him how a snake draft works. Sig fails on his end of a contract. Should he be disbarred? You decide.
I Don't Even Care
In this Episode, Chaos reigns as ambivalence seizes the host, John is thrown off his axis, George struggles to be funny, and Ian is a Halloween genius.
Sig's Slumdog Millionaire Moment
George host's our halloween special, asking the other guys trivia about the beloved holiday. I hope you enjoy this one, and may your days be filled with rice.
When Worlds Collide
AI takes over our wretched lives.
When worlds collide, you can run
But no can hide!
When worlds collide, you'll laugh so hard you'll swear you've died
When worlds collide
Hold my hand, I'll be your guide when worlds collide
Buckle, buckle, buckle up for the sweetest ride
And prepare to have your mind blown wide when worlds collide
When worlds collide
When worlds collide, it's a curious thing
Bet ya never heard a robot and a caveman sing
In his metal chest are some working parts
How is that different from by beating heart?
I'm from the future
And I'm from the past
But that don't mean this friendship wasn't built to last
He was made in a lab and I was born in a cave
So let me hear you holler for this inter-era rave!
You, you, you can run
But no can hide!
When, when worlds collide
AI Bounty Hunters
The Boiz discuss taxes, Bounty Hunting, and AI
President John (9.10.23)
Season 4 is here! This isn't actually the first episode we recorded this fall, but has Sig published his episode? No. Does Sig even care about his friends? Probably not. Is Sigmund some kind of psychopath slash devil-worshipper? Likely. Enjoy this episode hosted by George!
Bird Day
The birthday boy demands that his jesters (all of whom are named Tom Fool) entertain him with jokes and segments. He invites you all to listen.
JohmFoolery
The boiz discuss traffic, empty gas tanks, and the origin of common phrases.
Dream Vacations
We still have a podcast goys! We do another draft in this one, fantasizing about our dream vacations. George hosts. Stay tuned until the end for a special, extra-long update of what we've been up to recently. Emma Watson makes an unlikely appearance.
Unnatural Parks
The gang discuses finance and drafts their perfect National Park
Cohost or Comost
John, George, and Sig co-host for the first time in Lawnboiz history. They contemplate a would you rather and play some games, while doing the most to prove they're not as dumb as they appear.
Chipunks
Listener beware: This episode is sped up for comedic effect. The gang discusses baked goods and what to do if you win the lottery.
Frigid Funeral
The boiz discuss not being around, dying wishes, and which door is best.
The History of The Lawn Boiz
George leads this podcast recorded on 9.11.22. He asks the boys some trivia from our own history as a podcast to mark our two year anniversary! Sigmund freaks out as usual. Enjoy!
Rocket Surgeons
The boiz discuss who they want to open their hearts to, Ticks and tricks, and their recent Bachelor Party experience.
Over(hill) and(or) Under(hill)
On this episdoe John is comparable to a bear sh--ing in the woods, George is slow roasted in a dehydrator, and Ian questions his wide knees.
Riddle Me Diss
In this episode the Cheif's choke because of John's tiny throat.
New Year, New John (1.2.2022)
As we bravely enter our third year of podcasting, it's more of the same old crap. Enjoy this one rife with technical failure and the host abandoning the podcast. George breaks down 2021 with the boys and things just generally break down as well.
Letariat: Pro or Con?
The Boiz discuss class and classes all while having class.
The Big Three and Dennis (10.12.21)
George takes the host role this episode and the rest of the boys become bosts. Listen as the boys draft their top four greatest actors of all time and John does something completely different from that. Who would you choose?? Comment below.
Are you smarter than a Lawn Boi? 9.25.21
We are back for a beauty of an episode where we discuss out knowledge of high school subjects via a buzzfeed quiz. Then, we decide what house we would be in if we got into Hogwarts- application pending.....Enjoy the weekend :)
What is this podcast now? CRAZINESS
I edited this right after we recorded it. Craziness in the podcast as John doesn't know how to speak and ask the questions he wants. We do some riddles, play 20 questions, and over/under rating on some TV Shows. It is good to be back for Season 2 babyyyyy
A Couple of Boys and Debbie (9.5.21)
Random coworker Debbie joins for her second appearance on the pod! George hosts and asks the boys hard hitting questions, family feud style. The squad also dishes out their recommendations for you, the esteemed viewer (hi John's mom). The boys reveal their addresses at the end.
Estranged Advice (8.22.21)
George runs a media empire, I say tomato; they say potato, John scores a goal in rocket league, and Ian is Scandinavian.
Season 2: Salazar Magooliger (8.3.21)
Welcome to the first episode of season two, goys! George leads this one as the boys grapple with being very short or tall, entering sketchy butcher shops, and Greco-Roman wrestling whilst doused in flames. It feels good to be back.
The Lawn Boiz Go LIVE! (6.29.21)
For this very special summer edition of the podcast, the Lawn Boiz record in person for the first time ever! We celebrate a very special day for a very creative member of our group; we ask each other newlywed-game-esque questions; and we struggle to speak into the microphone. No one host this week, only pure anarchy.
Are you a popular baby? 5.17.21
Hello goys! Sorry for the late upload. It is Georges fault, as always. We are back for a short episode in which the theme is names: horse and baby names. Have a good week goys. Hopefully we get more consistent, probably not tho.
Hippoglyphics
In this Episode we talk about the times and how they are a'changin. We analyze problematic comedy and dig into the facts and fictions of ancient Egypt.
The Gang Plays Rocket League
The Boiz are back with a rare Ian hosted episode that actually got released. George channels his inner Tony Romo, John says he's in center while in the back right corner, Sig scores some nasty aerial goals, and Ian questions their commitment to vacation.
Tom Hardy's Traps (4.6.21)
George takes the helm as Craig decides to work (sort of) once more. The boys play a rousing game of FMK that ends with a twist final round. Then an original take on a March Madness-style bracket game leads the boys to declare the funniest movie of all time. Tune in.
SPRING. WARMTH. MADNESS.
Spring: the season after winter and before summer, in which vegetation begins to appear, in the northern hemisphere from March to May and in the southern hemisphere from September to November. Do you love spring? Because I do. Full of madness, march madness. Enjoy the episode of us being back!
Throwback - Black History Month (2.28.21)
We give you a two week old recording in which George hosts and asks Black History month trivia. Craig The Omnipotent decided to ruin some of our audio, but since then we have appeased him, and he will no longer cause the mighty volcano to erupt on our humble island - Craigtopia. Praise the wonderful Craig! Amen.
Have a Mice Day (3.9.21)
Its'a good episode
We LOVE Fútbol- Super Bowl Addition! (2.15.21)
In this episode we grieve with John after the super bowl loss. Come on in to decide if you truly care about one person in our would you rather. We enjoy talking through some super bowl facts, without talking about the actual football :) Edited and hosted by the goat John.
Layers of Fun 2.8.21
The Boiz are back in town as Sigmund leads them through hypothetical questions and they once again peel back the layers of fact and fiction in order to reach the truth, which may bring tears to your eyes.
We Hate Craig (1.24.21)
We're back baby! After a long hiatus, George takes the helm to bring the podcast into 2021. Super heroes and animals abound. Ian soaps up some bad guys. Sigmund knows nothing about the red handfish. John cracks pepper.
Captain Hook (pronounced Huk)
Captain Seg leads this episode while first mate Ilan attempts a coupe with the help of Jon. Gorgingi learns something about the true meaning of Kwanzaa and teaches us that family is the most important thing.
Under Patrick's Rock (12.6.20)
George leads the lawn boiz this week in a riveting discussion of samurai ethics. We also play a super original game in which we guess the answer to holiday facts. Happy St. Nick's Day!
Cra------ig are you there??? (12.1.20)
Happy December! Welcome back to our regularly scheduled episodes- through much technological issues. In this episode we talk about....I forget to be honest we recorded so many episodes. Have fun with a classic would you rather, deciding when it is time for Christmas activities, and guessing Rotten Tomato scores!
Sigmund is SO Creative! ft. Debbie (11.15.20)
Which Lawn Boi would you most want to be? This question and many more are answered in this special episode featuring out first guest star, random coworker Debbie! Cockroaches were killed in the making of this program.
Tyrannical Talents (11.8.20)
We discuss our future as creative geniuses, contemplate our legacies, and try to discern the metaphysical underpinnings of what makes a thing real or fake.
Happy Halloween Goys! (11-4-20)
Ships. Ocean floor. 3 million!?!?! Happy halloween goys. Cha boy edited post halloween. Keep the spirit alive. See you next week!
Illegible Aliens (10.18.20)
Today we get a tiny bit political, ponder the differences of isolation on an island and in the depths of space, and finish off with a delectable debate of ingenious invention. Thanks for Tuning in!
Lee Harvey Boswald and New Skills
We try to teach each other new skills, but instead get distracted by a new character in the life of JFK.
Didgeri-dubstep
George hosts this week and does a fine job. The boys talk travel and reminisce on the days when they used to live together. Alfred Meinstein gets a voice.
Fly Me a River (9.27.20)
Tune in this week as we take a spill into temporal quandaries, exciting news stories, and life or death situations.