Love via HaShem
By Hezi
Love via HaShem Apr 03, 2019
S02 E05 - Exclusive Interview with Berthe and Maturin
Zara and I had the pleasure of sitting down with Berthe and Maturin for an exclusive interview regarding marriage, and marriage with children. They gave very unique insights, and we're quite fortunate to have been able to learn from them.
Enjoy!
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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S02 E04 - Get Real Get Married - Part 2
Get Real, Get Married is written by Aleeza Ben Shalom, and we highly recommend it.
Keep an open mind.
For our related Publish0x blog regarding this book -- check out this link HERE
https://www.publish0x.com/loveviahashem/get-real-get-married-00-first-commit-xryenkz?a=Jrb2Rv1AbW&tid=LoveViaHashem
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
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S02 E03 - Get Real Get Married - Part 1
Get Real, Get Married is written by Aleeza Ben Shalom, and we highly recommend it.
One of the important aspects to takeaway is knowing yourself, and just how important that is.
For our related Publish0x blog regarding this book -- check out this link HERE
https://www.publish0x.com/loveviahashem/get-real-get-married-00-first-commit-xryenkz?a=Jrb2Rv1AbW&tid=LoveViaHashem
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
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S02 E02 - Five Practical Tools to Win in Marriage
Welcome to Season 2 of Love via HaShem!
In this episode, we’re talking about the tools below, and how they can help strengthen your relationship.
- Slack
- Google Keep
- Google Drive
- Google Photos
- Alexa (Amazon Echo)
Keep in mind that tools are only as good as how you use them. Also, how the marriage is in other areas might be more important - consider taking care of them first. All in all, where you focus your attention in your relationship is up to you. Hard work and learning is a part of the mix in the journey for nuptial success.
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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Music - Sweet Evening by Hezi
This piece is called Sweet Evening, and it's performed by yours truly ;D
I decided to hop back on the guzheng after some time away, and I felt the desire to share some of this love with you... hoping that you enjoy!
---- Sending you sunshine and love! (^_^* -----
(scroll to the bottom to find some general wiki information about the guzheng)
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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The zheng (Chinese: 箏; pinyin: zhēng; Wade–Giles: cheng) or guzheng (Chinese: 古箏; pinyin: gǔzhēng; lit.: 'ancient zheng'), is a Chinese plucked zither with a more than 2,500-year history. The modern guzheng commonly has 21, 25 or 26 strings, is 64 inches (1.6 m) long, and is tuned in a major pentatonic scale. It has a large, resonant soundboard made from Paulownia. Other components are often made from other woods for structural or decorative reasons. Guzheng players often wear fingerpicks made from materials such as plastic, resin, tortoiseshell, or ivory on one or both hands. The guzheng is ancestral to several other Asian zithers such as the Japanese koto,] the Korean gayageum and ajaeng, Mongolian yatga,the Vietnamese đàn tranh, the Sundanese kacapi and the Kazakhstan jetigen. The guzheng should not be confused with the guqin, a Chinese zither with 7 strings played without moveable bridges. The guzheng has gone through many changes during its long history. The oldest specimen yet discovered held 13 strings and was dated to around 500 BC, possibly during the Warring States period (475–221 BC). The guzheng became prominent during the Qin dynasty (221–206 BC). By the Tang Dynasty (618–907 AD) the guzheng may have been the most commonly played instrument in China. The guzheng is plucked by the fingers with or without plectra Most modern players use plectra that are attached to up to four fingers on each hand. Ancient picks were made of mundane materials such as bamboo, bone, and animal teeth or by finer materials such as ivory, tortoiseshell, and jade. Traditional playing styles use the right hand to pluck notes and the left hand to add ornamentation such as pitch slides and vibrato by pressing the strings to the left of the movable bridges. Modern styles use both hands to play on the right side of the strings. There are many techniques used to strike notes. One iconic sound is a tremolo produced by the right thumb rotating rapidly around the same note.
S02 E01 - Give 100/100 (not 50/50 in your Relationship)
Welcome to Season 2 of Love via HaShem! This is the first episode of this season - S02E01 .
I'm happily joined by my awesome wife Zara, and together we're hoping to bring you more content to boost your knowledge and understanding vis-a-vis love and relationships!
So, what’s this 100/100 business about? Well, over the years, we’ve heard and seen quite a few examples where couples would go for a state of equality - known as 50/50. This episode explains why that is difficult, and mostly not the way to go for relationships, even though it sounds like a very fair option. To oversimplify - 50/50 starts to become troublesome for a couple to maintain because it assumes perfect conditions where each person has the ability, time, or other resources in place to make their part of the deal work. You can see where this can be headed -- to a state of inflexibility.
I handle the counter - you clean the floor. So, what happens if the baby is crying and you can’t do the floor in a timely manner? Well, under the 50/50 idea - that work just doesn’t get done … and it bottlenecks in the undone pile until you do the “responsible thing” and clean the floor like you’re “supposed to.” Can you see where this starts feeling unloving and cold? Quite unromantic if you ask me ;D So, what’s the answer? If you left to help the kid … I say “no worries” -- I’ll take care of your part too. Here we have it - flexible - loving - kind - and an idea that works! That is 100/100.
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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E049 - The Importance of Mashpi'im 🤓📚
Welcome to Love via HaShem. This lesson is about Mashpia.
After finding someone, write down your list:
- How do you feel around people? (determining chemistry)
- Ask about relationship with each parents
- Who is their Mashpia?
- What do you want out of life?
- What is something that their mother/father does which they like?
- What is something that your own mother/father do which you like and want to emulate in some way?
It’s best to look introspectively at yourself, lest we get too interogative with the other person. Understanding ourselves can be just as important.
Mashpia (Hebrew: משפיע) lit. "person of influence", pl. Mashpi'im (Hebrew: משפיעים) -- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mashpia
Who is their Mashpia? Is there anyone (elder prefered) guides them?
When they are going in the wrong direction, who sounds the siren? Be careful of someone who has no points of authority, counselors, or advisors. It’s quite possible that they don’t like people telling them what to do. When you try to give them advice, maybe they won’t be so receptive. Perhaps they’ll tell you to stop acting like their mom, or to stop “preaching” at them, when all you’re trying to do is positively offer advice. Some people just want affirmation - “yes” humans around them, to make them feel good about every decision. Everything that a person has, doesn’t have, says, and doesn’t say, all can be telling about them, their personality, and what direction they’re going in life. Let’s determine whether it’s the same path that you’re walking on.
Write about what you want out of life.
Where do you want to be in a year? Perhaps, you’d like to have your own business up and running by then, or to get healthy by changing how to eat and exercise …. Or whatever it is …. Understand yourself, and come to understand the other person.
It shouldn’t be that a child wants to be NOTHING like their parents, or that NOTHING from them is worthy of passing down. That’s a red flag. So, find out what is it about their parent’s child-raising that they like.
#Random … Speaking of children, never criticize your spouse in front of the children. Better yet, never criticize your spouse in front of anyone.
Don’t scream/yell for/at that person who is close to you from another room. They’re not an animal. As much as possible, try to go up and talk to your dearest. :)
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening! -------------------- (^_^)
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E048 - Run the Right Race; Stay the Course 👟
Seeing life as a race, makes a position of stale complacency of where you are, an impossibility! You cannot simply lie down in laziness, when you understand that this life is race, and the runners of this race, if they are temperate in all things, will succeed. Temperate is another way of saying ☯ balanced (think Yin and Yang). Don’t eat too much, don’t eat too little, be aware of how much you spend watching this, doing that, drinking here, and talking over there. The balance has to be just right. Talk to HaShem about clarity, and understand yourself and those matters/skills/things which you want to master. Success and mastery often doesn’t come all at once, so steady and mindfully face yourself, and what’s around you. And looking inwardly, if you’re disciplined, you’ll follow whatever it is that you’re preaching, staying authentic, and keeping the course.
[LVH 48, Torah 24, 1 Cor 9 Part 5] {E048 - Run the Right Race; Stay the Course 👟}
Learn about the Five Levels of Pleasure HERE
https://www.aish.com/sp/f/Five_Levels_of_Pleasure.html
Here are the pesukim (verses) below -
1 Corinthians 9 AMP (Amplified Bible)
24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run [their very best to win], but only one receives the prize? Run [your race] in such a way that you may seize the prize and make it yours! 25 Now every athlete who [goes into training and] competes in the games is disciplined and exercises self-control in all things. They do it to win a crown that withers, but we [do it to receive] an imperishable [crown that cannot wither]. 26 Therefore I do not run without a definite goal; I do not flail around like one beating the air [just shadow boxing]. 27 But [like a boxer] I strictly discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached [the gospel] to others, I myself will not somehow be disqualified [as unfit for service].
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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E047 -- Signs of Healthy Relationships 🔬
Have a list. Ask yourself some questions. Get to know yourself. What are you looking for? Understand enough to be able to recognize your spouse. Are you comfortable with that person when you do meet them?
Ask them about their father (if they’re male). Ask about their mother (if female). The relationship with their parents could be telling of their personality and how they will be in their relationship with you. Are they preoccupied with that emotion against their parent? That may translate into that person not YET having the emotional resources to be a spouse. They have unresolved feelings which are hampering and they should get that figured out first.
Are there any hot buttons? -- Do they get suddenly angry at the thought of their father?
Do you get the feeling that they just want to escape? -- get married just to get away from it all?
If so, watch out.
Usually if the daughter has an issue with her Mom, it usually changes once the daughter has children.
Does this person talk good about their parents -- Awesome… that’s a GREAT sign!
Don’t make excuses in order to stay with a person -- be fully aware and pay attention to all sides of your conscious. Mindfully consider all these things. Don’t marry out of Rachmones!
Rachmones = compassion/pity/mercy/empathy --- in our instance it refers to pity.
LVH 47 Ahava 24 DatingF6
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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E046 - Stay in your Lane? 🚘 NO! ... Balance your Heart to Extend Love to Others. ☯️
Ying Yang Question - How can you be Free AND a servant!?
OK ... so we have freedom to do; and yet we are bound?
{Check out 1 Cor. Chap 9}
It’s like this. We are free to love others as we have the mitzvah to do so, and we can take certain liberties to love others (e.g. showing love with words, actions, kindness, and good works) . The caveat is that we should don’t compromise ourselves. You’re free to do things, but not to the point that it hurts your relationship with Gd. It’s better to refrain if you think that it will harm the relations between you and HaShem. For example, if you know that you personally couldn’t care less about going to the Western Wall to daven (pray), and you’re feeling totally indifferent to that action, you’re certainly free not to go, but at the same time, you should feel deeply the mitzvah to love others and be in with them. The Aibishter (the most High) really likes it when you make an effort to connect, level with, and love others even if you don’t really feel like it. That’s how there’s this ying yang balance. In a good relationship, we don’t have to do everything that we like and because we feel like it. We just should be doing it - and all of the other positive features of having done it will arrive to you, and you’ll be feeling those after-effects. And, if not, do what’s good anyway.
So, gain closeness with others. It’s ok to be flexible to show love to others. It doesn’t affect your authenticity. Imagine that you’re an atheist, and you really don’t like this whole Gd stuff, but you still want to be loving. Well ... feel free to go into Shuls, Churches, and Mosques and the like, to love on other people, understand them, and grow to care. Our Gd has a big heart, and by obtaining this yin yang “being a servant and being free” balance, you’ll gain one too.
Connecting with others is to love them. Give to them. Speak to people on their level.
Don’t break yourself or your relationship with HaShem, but feel free to be flexible to show that you care to other people.
LVH 46, Torah 23, 1 Cor 9 Part 4
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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E045 - How to be Mindful about Your First Date 💚
If you are meeting, you may know some things already. Know at least the basics of what you want. Usually dating sites can help with this, but they might not provide everything you’re looking for in terms of information. If you can get a picture of the person in the context of what you’re looking for before meeting up …. without being too unnatural in conversation …. then go for it. Having someone (like a shadchan/matchmaker or a genuine friend) makes getting intellectual questions like “how many kids” easier because they can ask in a more formal way and it feels like a screening which is an honest approach when what you're doing is actually, openly, and honestly screening. Don’t feel bad to perform screening by these means, keeping it natural and polite, because what you’re looking for is YOUR HUSBAND / YOUR WIFE / YOUR BESHERT!
So why meet? To find out if you’re comfortable around this person. ALSO, to ask any of these intellectual questions which are perhaps too personal to ask online and without full context.
Questions like
“Do you want kids? How many kids do you wish to have?”
-- should not be coming up 2 months later because what you’re aiming for is clarity.
Make a list of everything that you value. Include points within the physical, emotional, and especially intellectual categories.
Finally, how do you feel? The first moment may have a bit of unease, but it shouldn’t be long lasting at all, and in fact - that person should make you comfortable with who you are. Be mindful during the meeting to notice how you feel, and how the other person interacts with you and those around them. “Are they gentle, kind, funny, lively etc…?”
Afterwards, go introspective and ask yourself, how did the other person make you feel? Write it down, keep it so that you can make decisions off of it. Remember, you’re looking for the one who will be the closest to you, forever -- so, all of it matters.
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LVH 45 Ahava 23 DatingF5
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DONATING or SHARING …. are the two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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E044 - Support Those Who are Balanced and Honest
Money Money Money is a famous song which Abba sang some time ago. It’s reflective of the sad situation that many organizations are in. Rabbi Paul noticed the horrible imbalance of how money is handled and asked for. There was fiscal abuse, and he was addressing it of the freedom to ask for money.
Indulgences was practice that was akin to stealing money under the pretense that it was giving salvation to those souls who had passed away. This is very similar to how things are these days with preachers saying “Come give money, plant the “seed” … and get your blessing.” Practices like that affect us all, and we have to be careful to protect each other when it comes to cheats and frauds who are in it for themselves, the lavish life, money, and all else aside from HaShem’s purposes which greatly involves being OTHERS focused. A great example of the proper way to treat money is the organization - Ephrata Ministries (of Pennsylvania)
http://www.ephrataministries.org (I’m in not fiscally associated in any way btw)
A the beginning of November annually, and for a full week …. you receive room and board PLUS Torah learning, song singing, fellowship. BTW the food is amazing! It’s called Youth Bible School. Guess how much all of this is? $100 …. Yea, one can hardly get a great hotel stay at that price, let alone a get-away all-expenses-paid growth-oriented week-full of blessed Torah study. It’s beautiful. They're an example of how organizations striving to be godly should be run. Check out the school as November approaches. (or just stop in in general)
Here’s an example of the 2018 Youth Bible School registration - http://www.ephrataministries.org/announcements-ybs.a5w
LVH 44, Torah 22, 1 Cor 9 Part 3
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DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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E043 - It's OK to Be a Little Selfish
E042 - A Modest Return for a Spiritual Service
Asking for money is OK. Don’t muzzle an ox while it’s treading the grain. The ox is doing a work, let it take in some of that sustenance. We have the right to ask for money for our services, even if they’re spiritual. You can consume part of the offering, and that’s your right.
There’s tons of tv-evangelists and other folks who just after the money. They make it their biggest thing. Jets, fancy cars, and big houses quickly become their trademark. And, although asking for $ is allowable, these people, while doing a spiritual service, take it too far. They seek all these rich-type items to show off their wealth and to feel big. Rather than spending it lavishly, it’s far greater to put it back into the mechanism that directly affects the people being served, and reserving some to modestly sustain and improve your life.
Rabbi Mike Stern is the perfect example of this. He used whatever he got from donations to upgrade his work for us, while still modestly sustaining his family and improving himself.
(I mention my dear Rabbi … and, after this episode was made, he has since passed on. RIP)
LVH 42, Torah 21, 1 Cor 9 Part 2
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DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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E038 - Guard the Consciousness of Your Brother
LVH 38, Torah 19, 1 Cor 10 Part 5
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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How to Find the One? - Interview with Zara
There's plenty of ways people talk about for winning in the "game" of finding your beshert (the one aka soulmate). To put it simply, after consistently using the tools of the web (for example: Coffee Meets Bagel) you need to KNOW yourself. Looking inwardly, the introspective intelligence, puts you on the path of self-understanding. What are your values? With whom do you get along with? What future do you dream of? Do you see kids? (intellectual category) Do you see a partner who goes snowboarding with you? Or, maybe you just want a chill-on-the-couch partner? (emotional category)
PIE - Physical, Intellectual, and Emotional.
-- Physical is the easiest, but can be the most superficial (gotta have someone with strong arms right?)
-- Emotional, medium in difficulty, and you may not want to compromise. (like a partner who likes to surf like you do :)
-- Intellectual, hardest to determine, and you definitely don't want to compromise. (like whether you want to have kids together)
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DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
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E041 - Be Considerate, Not Overly Honest
Ever heard the old adage “Honesty is the best policy.”? In relationships, this can definitely prove to be hogwash that can ruin your day, and the day of the other person. Strive for foresight and wisdom in your relationships (romantic or otherwise). Yes, you could say a truth, but is that truth guarded by love. Is it considerate? Is this the right time?
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Let’s say that you see a co-worker who is tired. Do you say, “Wow you look terrible, and like you haven’t slept!”? … Despite whatever truth those statements might have, you want to do some critical thinking to check whether that is the verbal path that you’d like to embark upon.
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E040 - The Balance of Personal Freedom
We have a lot of freedom, especially in the US. But, what does it all mean? How can we harness our freedoms in the best way. How can we pick up from the mind-ways of others to learn, and maybe show them love by joining in on their schtik. In knowing yourself, you can understanding that a blend of what someone else is doing or not doing doesn’t mean that you are losing yourself or not being authentic. Be clear on your purpose for doing something - always. You want to show love, and if that means doing a little more, or something that is a little outside of your comfort zone - do it. Make it happen, and grow from it.
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Music by Zechariah Mathz - Sweet Pine
This piece is called Sweet Pine, and it's by Zechariah Mathz
Check more of his music out here: @Zechariah Mathz https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsf1e1EuBQPyYAlo7ZiFcJA
Sending you sunshine and love! (^_^*
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E039 - Use the Matchmaker!
E037 - Casual Dating and the Way of Finding a Marriage Partner - Series with Rabbi Manis Friedman
LVH 37 Ahava 19 DatingF1
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E036 - Lawful? Perhaps… but is it Expedient? Does it Edify?
You receive the question from your partner whether they look fat. You know they need some more gym time *hint *hint … so what should you say? Truth or Lie … Well, keep this in mind before you answer, sensitivity, consideration, and love need to be part and parcel of every single thing we do. So, stay positive, and stay loving. ;D
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E035 - How to Support ... and Really Show It! #Love
Cut each other slack
Embrace the differences (and celebrate them)
Desire to grow with that person
Strive to see the world through their eyes
One way of being able to cut another person slack is to get a mashbia (a counselor) - someone who wants the success of your relationship and will give you good advice. When the problem is very serious, that person should be honest, but when you need to cut the person slack, and you’re not doing the right thing - having an honest tongue around you certainly means an outside influence for a change of heart.
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E034 - How to Accept Responsibility, Our Connective Bond
When we share we become one with each other. This is how the communion operates, as well as eating in general. Think of eating like heightening the spiritual connective tissues that bond us to everything involved in that thing. This means a bond with those sharing in that nourishment and our bond to that thing that we’re consuming, as well as with what that thing represents. It’s like how the old saying goes “you are what you eat!”
LVH 34, Torah 17, 1 Cor 10 Part 3
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E033 - The More We Invest, the More We Love
E032 - What is Idolatry? Don’t Test HaShem; rather Look Within
We need to identify where we are in our stance with Gd. By looking within, and checking ourselves with the Torah we can get insight on our relationship status, and find out what can be tweaked. Overly focusing on anything that is not HaShem can lead our hearts to feel that that specific thing is the most important thing in the world. And then our mind and heart is consumed and wrapped up in a single-hearted non-God related thing. That, in turn, becomes like an idol, hence the word “idolatry.”
Testing HaShem happens when we continually lust after a thing, e.g. could money and the pursuit of riches, while having in full knowledge that that isn’t what we should be doing. Through our understanding of the Bible, we know that a continual focus on non-spiritual matters is unhealthy for our neshamas. However, please keep in mind that this translates quite differently when we are talking about marriage. Marriage is a representation of Gd and his people, that holiness means that focusing on serving your spouse and prioritizing their desires is never an idolatrous thing. It’s rather quite beautiful.
LVH 32, Torah 16, 1Cor 10 Part 2
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E031 - Do you want Marriage? Get Clarity, Have Fun, and Ask those Questions
Why do we date?
We date for clarity.
So, if you’re involved physically, there’s a good chance that you’re not going to be thinking as clearly. If you’re doing things with the person that doesn’t allow you to receive adequate knowledge of them, it’s not bringing you that clarity. Check out the 36 Questions That Lead to Love when you can. It will certainly bring a better understanding of this other human.
Also, wanting marriage is essential. Determine, of course (step one), if that is what you want. And, if so, it is a good idea to bring up that subject to get the clarification from the other person, about their desires in light of the idea of marriage. Are they just playing the field, or do they desire the same thing as you? Maybe you both just want to mess around. Keep in mind, that these questions are not always the most comfortable, even if you’re very polite about asking, but their response, and indeed HOW they respond, should be quite revealing.
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E030 - Put in Effort, Build Emunah (Faith), and go into the Promised Land
LVH 30, Torah 15, 1Cor 10 Part 1
Below are some audio notes:
//HISTORY Refers back to what happened. BE AWARE - Cloud and passed through the sea They were under the cloud - protection from the sun - guiding system - fog to blind the Egyptians (e.g. b4 the dead sea) Passing through the sea is a symbol of water baptism Coming out of the dead and into a new relationship with God. all were baptized into Moses in the cloud and in the sea. To be baptized into Moses means to be identified with him and to acknowledge his leadership. Drink - from a rock, and that Rock was Christ. Come to drink of the water of life freely. 12 spies that reported which made the people fearful but Joshua and Caleb - YES, huge grapes people numbered 10
no faith - no trust shown - leading toooooo Longest funeral service in the world - 40 years waiting for all of them to DIE (except Joshua and Caleb)
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Music by Hezi and Zaq - Following of a Star, Part 2
Here's a piano piece by my brother and I at my sister's house during the Christmas / Hanukkah holiday Check more of his music out here: @Zechariah Mathz https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsf1e1EuBQPyYAlo7ZiFcJA DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening! -------------------- (^_^)
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E029 - What is Beshert? The Origin of “Soulmate”
Moment Magazine’s article called Jewish Word | Beshert BY SALA LEVIN August 30, 2013 - Enjoy!
A Talmudic Date with Destiny Stroll Manhattan’s Upper West Side on a Saturday night and you’ll find yourself surrounded on all sides by prospective couples trying each other out. The last few years have seen an explosion in the neighborhood’s popularity among Jews in their twenties and thirties. For New York’s young Jewish singles, destiny—or beshert—has an address, and it’s west of Central Park. The term beshert is most often used to mean a soulmate: the one person whom an individual is divinely destined to marry… Though the term beshert can refer to any fortuitous event (“I missed the bus, but it must have been beshert, because I heard it broke down”), it’s most often used to mean a soulmate: the one person whom an individual is divinely destined to marry. The etymology of the Yiddish word—spelled, generally, either bashert or beshert—is something of a mystery. Some argue that the word comes from the German beschert, meaning bestowed or given. (Bescherung, a version of the word, is used to describe the exchange of gifts on Christmas.) Others say that it’s from the Yiddish word sher, meaning scissors or shears, the idea being that beshert is something that has been shaped in a specific way, as if cut out by a pair of unseen scissors.The concept of a soulmate is nothing new, or uniquely Jewish. In The Symposium, Plato has Aristophanes present the idea that humans originally had four arms, four legs and one head made of two faces; Zeus split these creatures in half, leaving each torn creature to search for its missing counterpart. The widely used kismet—a Turkish derivation of the Arabic word qisma, meaning lot or portion—originated as the version of fate in the Arab world. The Jewish theory of soulmates has its roots in that most romantic of canonical texts: the Talmud. The sage Rav stipulates that “40 days before the formation of a child, a heavenly voice issues forth and proclaims, the daughter of this person is for that person; the house of this person is for that person; the field of this person is for that person.” This declaration is considered the origin of the idea of the soulmate in Judaism, although it is also discussed elsewhere, including Kabbalah, which teaches that husband and wife are plag nishamasa, or “half-souls.” The 13th-century scholar, ... (read onward @ https://www.momentmag.com/jewish-word-beshert/)
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E028 - Mindfulness, and the Definition of Communion & Love Feasts
Remember that meditation runs smoothly throughout the Torah, and whenever you focus in on a certain thing for a length of time - that is meditation. Albeit, meditating on the sacrifice of Jesus, is far more powerful than focusing on the breath - they both have their place and time. As you read and discover more and more (check out the Septuagint ccat.sas.upenn.edu/nets/edition/ and the New Testament books) you will no doubt discover Philippians 4:8 King James Version (KJV) 8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. It tells you to think … and what to think on … that is a focus … that is a meditation.
The last part is about being mindful of each other. If you know that there are others who aren’t as well as as you are, allow that to play a part in your behavior. Maybe you set boundaries with what you say or do, to protect the feelings of the other. What do you think would be a good thing to increase mindfulness to watch out for your fellow neighbor?
KJV 1 Corinthians 11: 21 For in eating every one taketh before other his own supper: and one is hungry, and another is drunken. 22 What? have ye not houses to eat and to drink in? or despise ye the church of God, and shame them that have not? what shall I say to you? shall I praise you in this? I praise you not. 23 For I have received of the Lord that which also I delivered unto you, that the Lord Jesus the same night in which he was betrayed took bread: 24 And when he had given thanks, he brake it, and said, Take, eat: this is my body, which is broken for you: this do in remembrance of me. 25 After the same manner also he took the cup, when he had supped, saying, this cup is the new testament in my blood: this do ye, as oft as ye drink it, in remembrance of me. 26 For as often as ye eat this bread, and drink this cup, ye do shew the Lord's death till he come. 27 Wherefore whosoever shall eat this bread, and drink this cup of the Lord, unworthily, shall be guilty of the body and blood of the Lord. 28 But let a man examine himself, and so let him eat of that bread, and drink of that cup. 29 For he that eateth and drinketh unworthily, eateth and drinketh damnation to himself, not discerning the Lord's body. 30 For this cause many are weak and sickly among you, and many sleep. 31 For if we would judge ourselves, we should not be judged. 32 But when we are judged, we are chastened of the Lord, that we should not be condemned with the world. 33 Wherefore, my brethren, when ye come together to eat, tarry one for another. ... (Keep reading from the Bible Gateway ;)
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E027 - Definition of Mixed Emotions and Infatuation
Jerusalem U
Love and Relationships
A Brian K. Spector Film
Match Maker - Lori Palatnick
Love Doctors - Rabbi Raphael and Rebbeca Shore
Beauty and the Geek Star - Richard Reubin
Notes:
Start by the definition (makes you an intellectual)
What is Love
We know what it’s not - infatuation.
When you are infatuated? Would you ever walk around telling people ?
Love and infatuation They feel the same sometimes
Infatuation -
thinking they are perfect
putting all your ideal qualities on that person
Looks like love, but it’s a counterfeit
How do you know it wasn’t love - b/c it ended
Love is not blind - love is both eyes open, you see the good and you see the not so good, and you make an accounting, and you make a decision to focus in on the good.
Love is the pleasure of focusing in on his/her virtues.
it’s choice
it’s seeing the good and bad and focusing on the good
What’s the definition of mixed emotions.
Seeing your mother-in-law go out to a cliff with a beautiful brand new car. ;D
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E026 - The Head Covering Controversy
The order of command - angels subordinate to Jesus, and then He to Gd. So, Paul describes this order in order to tell us that we too should follow this order (Woman to Man, and then Man to God), and that the head covering serves us as a visual cue of this divine order. It’s delightful to read about, and to try and understand, and for sure, if you’re not sure - it’s better to do than not do. When in doubt, follow the mitzvah.
Just to be fair, the vast part of Jesus’s teachings are about the heart. Love G-d … and then love others (aka the neighbors). So, when a Christian, who has been hearing all you need is Jesus and these two mitzvos, come across this mitzvah, they get quickly suspicious. “Maybe it doesn’t actually pertain to me because this is an old Book, there are probably plenty of things that we don’t need to do anymore.” I wouldn’t be so quick to dismiss it. Think of it this way, on the surface, sleeping with someone who you are in love with even though there’s no marriage makes sense in these days (2018) …. So maybe the idea of “do not fornicate” is just a historical thing. Hmmm, logically, can we draw that comparison, and if we can - does it mean that since we follow that non-obvious mitzvah, that this mitzvah of head covering we should follow too? What do you think?
One pro is that piousness and Christian community identity can be fostered (like the Tzitzit in the Jewish community). One con is that it’s one more thing that a woman has to do in the morning ;P
What are the Pros and Cons in your opinion?
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E025 - How to Keep it Positive, The Recipe for Bliss
So, how do you keep it positive? By mindful awareness of the previous points - the fact that you must put effort into a relationship in order to make it work. Like a job, you’ve got to show up and put in those hours. Knowing and Being known … they need to know you in various and positive ways, as well as you them. Find out the small details and expand upon it to harness the observables in a beautiful way. For example, you notice a birthmark that you hadn’t seen before…. Wow … complement them on it then, and/or in the future. We need our eyes act as actors of blessing, and not for comparison all the time, or to judge. By thoroughly searching for how we can uplift, edify, and praise the beauty, character, and all else of that other person … we can reach this next level, and keep it positive all the way.
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E024 - How to Bless Others
E023 - Focus on Good, Build Positive Outlook, Speak Life
Knowledge brings intimacy. Confess, talk, speak … know God -- HaShem wants you to know Him. Learn about His deeds, his creations, look and spend time in His nature. In this same way we should come to know our partners in the relationships. Our spouses, husbands, and wives, need accept, see, feel and bring into meld their consciousness into the other person, so that a positive outlook can be build.
Then, focus on the good. Having a positive outlook is so crucial to building a healthy and long-lasting relationship. It’s easy to look at the negative in someone. “Oh look, you left your shoes out in the hallway …. Like ALWAYS!!!” …. How negative - and as science now shows, it is positive reinforcement that brings about positive change. Checking the words that we use also comes into play. Words like “always ” e.g. you always forget to turn off the lights downstairs …. Or “never” … e.g. You never seem to clean up after yourself do you? … ARE VERY HARMFUL to relationships, and we should, as much as possible, build healthy mouth habits. Doing so will bring a cycle of life and energy to the relationships which will, in time, reap you HUGE benefits. Don’t neglect these tips, write them down somewhere, and review. They’ll certainly keep you in the green for acceptance and an increase in love and knowledge.
Psychology of Relationships is a course by Jerusalem U, More videos on relationships from Jerusalem U - - medialab.jerusalemu.org/
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E022 - Treat Others Right! Rejoice in Truth, & Have Hope #Agape
E021 - Know and Let Yourself be Known ... a Relationships Secret
--- Remember --- what is good chemistry? ……. Answer?…. Feeling comfortable with the other person. When you are yourself, and you be so with this other person, that is a really good chemistry. In life we have many masks. Some of the masks are for our work, others are for our friends, and yet some for our family. But, with our partners we MUST be able to allow our thoughts and true opinions - in a healthy manner, be expressed. No one should feel stifled, or that their voice is quieted due to the pressure or verbal / non-verbal response of the other person.
- - Create an air of safe space around you. If you react poorly to news, and your partner notices, that can definitely be a deterrent to them sharing information that may get you to react similarly. People naturally fear rejection, so we have to Shomer Lashon (guard the tongue) … and our body language, so that … even if it is not what we want to hear, we still bring a neutral face and mouth to the table. This will build your Empathic Accuracy. Some explain this skill as EI (Emotional Intelligence) or SI (Social Intelligence) … but all of these are truly related to their cores, and should be seen as such. The point is to know what’s happening within and with the person that you’re with. (giving more reason to take up the art of meditation)
I hope that you enjoyed the podcast!
More videos on relationships from Jerusalem U - - medialab.jerusalemu.org/
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E020 - What Love Is, and What Love Isn’t, #Apape
Music by Hezi, Following of a Star, Part 1
I hope you enjoy this piano piece that I played. Hopefully, it can bring you a degree of relaxation and #chill. ;D
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DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: https://anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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(^_^) Stay connected via
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Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
My Blog - http://flowmindset.wordpress.com
E019 - How to Get On with Cleaving, Love isn’t a Partnership
Ahava means love. Love is so crucial to us humans. In our lives we can connect the dots of our personal relationships, and link that to our relationship with HaShem. Everything is connected. As we investigate deeper, we put these elements that we are exploring together deep into our heart, so that they may have a positive effect on everyone that we come in contact with.
In these episodes we’re covering the Jerusalem U's videos regarding love.
Jerusalem U (JU) is online education on a wide variety of meaningful topics - check them out!
julearn.jerusalemu.org/
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
Stay connected and check-out my
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: @LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
Instagram: @flowmindset
Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E018, Torah Portion #Bible
E018, Torah 9, 1 Corinthians 13, Part 3
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset
Thanks for listening!
------------
Stay connected and check-out my
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: @LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
Instagram: @flowmindset
Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E017, Ahava #Love, Psychology of Relationships
In these episodes we’re covering the Jerusalem U's videos regarding love.
Jerusalem U (JU) is online education on a wide variety of meaningful topics - check them out!
julearn.jerusalemu.org/
LVH 17, Ahava 9, Psychology of Relationships 4
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: twitter.com/LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
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Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E016 - Torah Portion #Bible
Torah means instruction. In these sections, we go through the Torah with an open mind, and just critically look at what it says from both, a secular and a Jewish perspective. It is my hope that you will find this episode enlightening and enjoyable. Blessings to you! ^_^
LVH 16, Torah 8, 1 Corinthians 13, Part 2
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
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(^_^) Stay connected via
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
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Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
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Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E015 - Ahava #Love
In these episodes we’re covering the Jerusalem U's videos regarding love.
Jerusalem U (JU) is online education on a wide variety of meaningful topics - check them out!
julearn.jerusalemu.org/
LVH 15, Ahava 8, Psychology of Relationships 3
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: twitter.com/LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/flowmindset/
Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E014 - Torah Portion #Bible
LVH 14, Torah 7, 1 Corinthians 13, Part 1
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: twitter.com/LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/flowmindset/
Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E013 - Ahava #Love
In these episodes we’re covering the Jerusalem U's videos regarding love.
Jerusalem U (JU) is online education on a wide variety of meaningful topics - check them out!
julearn.jerusalemu.org/
LVH 13, Ahava 7, Psychology of Relationships 2
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: twitter.com/LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/flowmindset/
Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E012 - Torah Portion #Bible
LVH 12, Torah 6, 1 Corinthians 14, Part 2
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: twitter.com/LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/flowmindset/
Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E011 - Ahava #Love
In these episodes we’re coving the Jerusalem U's videos regarding love.
Jerusalem U (JU) is online education on a wide variety of meaningful topics - check them out!
julearn.jerusalemu.org/
LVH 11 Ahava 6, Psychology of Relationships 1
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: twitter.com/LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/flowmindset/
Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider
E010 - Torah Portion
LVH 10, Torah 5, 1 Corinthians 14, Part 1
DONATING or SHARING …. The two biggest things that you can do if you want to support and/or be involved in some way. I want to keep doing this, and with your help, I can keep on keep’n on ;D Here’s the donation link: anchor.fm/LoveHaShem/support
If you share via Instagram, feel free to tag @flowmindset: Thanks for listening!
--------------------
(^_^) Stay connected via
YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/TheLinguisticFight
Twitter: twitter.com/LinguisticFight
Tumblr: linguisticfight.tumblr.com/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/flowmindset/
Duolingo TinyCards Flashcards - tinycards.duolingo.com/users/Icystrider