Mourning Meeting

On the final show of the season Mandi speaks with Kate Meyer, an Ordained minister and licensed professional counselor. Kate has worked in private practices and in hospice care, she is also the author of faith doesn't erase grief. 

Where to Find Us:

www.inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact

Mandi Talks to Natalie Santa Maria, who started a non-profit organization Leaves for Stella to honor her mother and support young adults after their loss. She also discusses the loss of both her parents and how she managed to give back to those going through similar struggles. 

To connect with Natalie: www.leavesfromstella.org 

INSTAGRAM: @leavesfromstella

LINKEDIN: in-leavesfromstella

TWITTER: leavestella

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact

Mandi discusses with Peter Grumbacher, a retired rabbi and public speaker, the trends towards using euphemisms for the word died, and the problems that it can create.

To connect with Rabbi Grumbacher, find him at peterabbit@aol.com.

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact

Mandi talks to Karen McMahon a certified relationship, divorce coach and founder of journey beyond divorce. We are going to talk about the impact of divorce on college students and when the right time, if there is such a thing, for when a divorce should happen.

To connect with Karen, find her at www.jdddivorcesupport.com or on Facebook @Journey Beyond Divorce.

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact

Mandi talks to Joanne Tubbs Kelly, the author of Walking Him Home, Helping My Husband Die With Dignity. Joanne discusses her husbands her terminal illness and the decision they made to end his life on his own terms. Joanne also shares the sudden loss of her son and the difference with grief between a sudden loss and a terminal illness. 

To connect with Joanne, find her at www.joannetubbskelly.com

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact

Mandi speaks with Darcy Krause the former Executive Director of Uplift Center for Grieving Children. They explore ways to discuss — with children — the death of someone close to them. They also discuss the ramifications the death of a public figure has with children and the questions that come along with it.

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact

Mandi speaks with Susan Angel Miller. Susan is the author of “Permission to Thrive” — a memoir she wrote in the aftermath of the sudden death of her teenage daughter. Mandi and Susan discuss the grief and trauma that can accompany losses of any type. They define post traumatic growth and explain how positive self growth and exploration is possible after great loss. Susan can be reached at www.susanangelmiller.com.

Where to Find Us:

www.inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact 

This episode focuses on creative ways to support student mental health on college campuses. From marketing and outreach techniques to educating teachers about the shame many students feel when they struggle academically, we need more people who understand the reality of students today. Mandi and Dr. Kimberly Quinn discuss how we can best accommodate, and encourgae the wellness of our students.

Where to Find Us: inner-harbor.org INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact.

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact 

If you, or someone you know, are thinking about taking your own life, there is help. Call The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-274-TALK (8255)

Mandi talks with grief educator Connie Palmer, about grief beliefs and the relationship between grief and shame — an important, but often misunderstood and overlooked topic. Through the lens of grief and loss, Mandi and Connie explore how false beliefs, fear and shame intersect and impact, not only our willingness to expose ourselves, but our ability to express ourselves. 

Connie Palmer is a licensed clinical social worker who is an experienced teacher, therapist and school counselor with more than 30 years of experience. She is currently a Grief Educator for Imagine, A Center for Coping with Loss in NJ and the owner of Therapeutic Learning Connections, offering social-emotional learning workshops for schools, community organizations and workplaces. Connie can be reached at cqpalmer@yahoo.com.

Where to Find Us: inner-harbor.org INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact.

Today, we are going to talk about eating disorders and grief, and how they relate to another. We talk about how eating disorders can bring on feelings of grief, related to our own sense of identity. We also explore how grief can create changes in appetite that can be the beginning of disordered eating. Often, grievers feel some lack of control, and controlling food intake may be one way to gain a sense of that back. In extreme cases, this control can turn in to severe restrictions of food intake. 

To reach out to Tziporah, find her on Instagram at @tziporaheisenstein.

Where to Find Us: inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact 

Mandi talks with Wendy Sefcik, a mother who lost her child to suicide. They reveal the important strategies we can draw on to help prevent suicide in our friends, family and students. Mandi and Wendy provide valuable insight and resources to the listener about suicide and suicide prevention and how to confront the swell of emotion that accompanies the topic. By normalizing and removing the stigma surrounding the discussion of death and suicide, Mandi and Wendy leave listeners better equipped to support people who may be struggling.

Wendy serves as Chair for the NJ Youth Suicide Prevention Advisory Council, as NJ Chapter Chair for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, Board Member for the Mental Health Association of Monmouth County and their Child Advocacy Committee and is employed as the Suicide Prevention Coordinator for Bergen County. Along with her husband Steve and son Matt, Wendy created Remembering T.J. - A Story of Teen Depression, Lessons and Hope. They have shared their story with over 30,000 people to raise awareness of depression and mood disorders in teens and suicide risk. Wendy also provides hope to those dealing with these issues and to those who have suffered a traumatic loss.

To connect with Wendy, reach out to her at: www.rememberingtj.org.

Where to Find Us:
inner-harbor.org
INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support
SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te
APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

If you, or someone you know, are thinking about taking your own life, there is help. Call The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-274-TALK (8255)

Melissa Lunardini and Mandi Zucker both founded organizations focused on supporting people after a loss.  They are both frequently asked how they maintain their own mental health in such an emotional draining job. In this episode, Mandi and Melissa share some of their own strategies they use to avoid burnout and focus on their own self-care.

Where to Find Us:

Melissa Lunardini, MA, MBA, FT can be reached at www.radicalgrief.org. 

Mandi Zucker, LSW, CT can be reached at www.inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact 

Joyal Mulheron and Mairead Peters talk about the efforts to make paid bereavement leave a reality for all Americans, and the current situation that allows for workers, particularly low-wage earners, to be fired for taking a day off of work after a family member dies. Mairead shares what it was like as a college student to lose two family members and the pressures she felt at work and at school to perform and make money.  Joyal shares what we can all do to get involved and advocate for employee support after a death.

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Joyal Mulheron can be reached at www.live-evermore.org

Mairead Peters can be reached at mairead@covect.org.

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact 

Amy is a social worker in rural Pennsylvania who shares her decision to have an abortion as a young adult. We talk about the  support she did, and did not, have as she made her decision and the reasons she kept her choice private from so many people. We also talk about the grief she experienced after the abortion and the ways she coped to deal with those feelings. 

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

To reach out to Amy, email her at amyemasters@outlook.com. 

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact 

Sanat Mohapatra is the creator of "Unmasked" a supportive, anonymous community built for college students, by college students. He is working to erase the stigma surrounding mental health and lower the barriers to accessing emotional support. Mandi and Sanat discuss the benefits of peer counseling, the inspiration and inner workings of Unmasked, and how you can get involved in the revolution that Unmasked is creating for the mental health of college students.

Where to Find Us:

Sanat Mohapatra: Sanat@unmaskedproject.com

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact 

If you, or someone you know, are thinking about taking your own life, there is help. Call The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-274-TALK (8255)

Kristina Jones is an award winning advertising art director turned tech entrepreneur. When Kristina was seven, her father died from cancer and she knew one day she wanted to share her story on how she kept the connection to her dad alive. Throughout the process of writing and editing, "My Forever Guardian" (Myforeverguardian.com), she noticed the immense lack of online support for the millions of grieving children here in the US. She quickly got to work building www.guardianlane.com, a children's mental health platform that is innovating how children access grief counseling. With the use of on-demand exclusive video content, community, tele-counseling and a whole lot of creativity, the children have begun to build their own social healing network.

To contact Kristina, reach out at to her at kjones@guardianlane.com.

Where to Find Us:

inner-harbor.org

INSTAGRAM: @innerharbor_grief_support

SPOTIFY: https://spoti.fi/2T5Q6Te

APPLE PODCASTS: https://apple.co/3yIwhAi

Reach out if you want to hear about a specific topic on the podcast or if you want to be a guest on the show: inner-harbor.org/contact 

Annie Tulkin is the founder of Accessible College, an organization dedicated to supporting students with all abilities have access to college. In this episode, we talk about why students need to learn to advocate for themselves differently in college, and how to do that. We discuss ways to find out what accommodations are available at each college and ways to distinguish quality disability services at each school. We also talk specifically about grieving college students, who are not disabled but may need some accommodations or accommodations for some time. Annie and I also explore what to think about when trying to access different kinds of support, like transportation, insurance and staffing.

To connect with Annie further, reach out to her at www.accessiblecolle.com or @accessiblecollege on facebook, instagram and twitter. 

Eric Kussin founded a nonprofit, We Are All a Little Crazy, after his own struggles with mental illness. His focus is on the mental health of college athletes because he noticed the unique challenges of mental fitness as an athlete, as well as the significant pressure on these students to perform. Eric's goal is to normalize the fact that we all have varying degrees of mental health, and illness, throughout our lives.

To contact Eric, reach out at to him at eric@sameheregolbal.org.

Bob Filippone is a father of three children, one of whom is transgender. His child, Glori Dei, was on the podcast last season and there was a lot of interest from people about their parents and what it was like to find out that their child is noon-binary. Bob has graciously agreed to be on the show to talk about it.  

A note about pronouns: Glori Dei uses they/them pronouns and Bob talks about them using that pronoun. 

If you are interested in speaking further to Bob about his experience, you can reach him at bobfili@yahoo.com.

Our final episode of the season will focus on how educators can best support students returning to the classroom. Many students have experienced some significant losses over the past year and will be returning to school different and in need of additional resources. Perhaps they had COVID, or had a family member who had it. Perhaps they had a significant death loss, either from the virus or from another illness, suicide or accident. Perhaps they have been affected by violence, or the images of violence, against Black or Asian Americans which has made leaving their home scarier for them. How can teachers support these students? In this episode, we discuss several strategies including acknowledgment, preparedness, structure and flexibility. 

If you have a strategy that has worked for you, please reach out and let me know. Mzucker@inner-harbor.org.

Glori Dei Filippone (they/them) is a recent graduate of New York University. They realized that they were trans in college and we talk about how they came to that understanding and what it was like to tell family and friends. We also talk about the relief they experienced when they realized who they are, but also the sense of loss and pain that this realization brought with it. Glori Dei explains some of the misconceptions about gender identity and helps us to understand the process involved, both internally as well as externally.

To reach out to Glori Dei, you can send them a DM on Instagram @gloridei22.

Alana's parents both died before she was in high school. She then moved in with her aunt in a new state and, once again, learned to make new friends in a new school. In this episode of the podcast, we talk about transitioning to college and what it was like to once again meet new people in an unfamiliar environment. Did that bring up feelings of loss? Did she get support? How did she then manage another transition to remote learning after the pandemic began?

Alana is a sophomore at Virginia State University studying math and psychology. 

Megan Ashley was only 18 when she witnessed the murder of her mother and survived her own attempted murder. A student in college at the time, Megan struggled to cope with the trauma and grief of that night, both physical and emotional. She now shares her story in the hopes of helping someone else going through trauma know that they can get through this and thrive. Megan shares about the supports she did and did not receive, as well as some of the things she has learned that may be useful to others going through violent deaths.

Megan can be reached on Instagram at @himeganashley or on her website, www.meganashley.com.

Accidents are the leading cause of death for people under 24 years old.  The nature of accidents often means that young people are best suited for organ donation because dying in an accident creates a possible scenario that someone's organ are healthy enough and are able to be artificially kept alive long enough to be donated to someone else.  So how do you make sure your wishes are known if you want, or don't want, to be a donor?  Is checking a box enough? This week, I speak with Michelle Post, MA, LMFT about organ donation and how to start conversations with family members about your wishes.

For more information, go to www.donatelife.net or reach out to Michelle at www.PostInternationalinc.com.

Many families begin to think about college before high school even begins. What major do you want to study? Should you take the SAT or ACT? What extracurricular activities will show your leadership skills to make you more desirable to a specific school? All of these things are important when considering the right academic fit for a student. But how do you measure the right emotional fit at a college or university? How do you make sure that a grieving student will be prepared for the transition to college? How do you know if a particular school will have enough supports in place to meet the needs of a grieving student? 

 With an education career spanning over 25 years, Brett Levine has worked with thousands of students going through the college search, application, and selection process. He has worked as a school counselor and administrator in two wonderful New Jersey districts, being one of the state’s first counselors to integrate Naviance into the schools back when it was known as TCCI. (The College Counselor on the Internet). He has also worked on the other “side of the desk” as a college admissions officer and academic advisor at Adelphi University and New York University respectively.

Mr. Levine works full time as a School Counselor in a wonderful New Jersey School District and lives in Union County, New Jersey with his wife Rachel (a social worker) and their two sons, Ryder and Jackson. Mr. Levine can be reached at brett@sensiblecollegecounseling.com.

Grieving college students often need comfort. Away from home and familial support systems, food can become that support for some. And for others, food feels like too much work when energy and motivation are low. In this episode, we explore the ways that food can comfort us when we are grieving, and also the ways that food can help with some grief symptoms like sleepiness, memory loss and lack of focus. We also explore ways to engage with food when we don't feel the motivation to eat.

Natalie Nation, she/her, is a graduate student, future registered dietician, health educator and content creator. She is the producer of Feed That Nation: a podcast, YouTube channel and blog where she discusses college life, college health and college wellness. 

Feed That Nations aims to shed light and provide education on college-related health and professional development topics, and Natalie shares her best advice and stories from her experience as a college student. She also talks openly about her mental health journey with ADHD. Natalies goal on Feed That Nation is to help college students to be successful in the endeavors, confident in themselves, and find health and balance in their student journey. 

She can be reached @FeedThatNation  on Instagram and www.feedthatnation.com.

Also mentioned in this episode, some additional resources include: Jessicathesportsrd, vitamin_ri, and foodsiencebabe on Instagram.

All students have been impacted in some way from this pandemic. Most people associated with a college or university want to address the needs of both faculty and students, but innovation is hard! Well, meet Taylor Young, a senior at Penn State and the President of the College of Education Undergraduate Student Council. Learn how she, along with her peers, listened to the needs of students in her college and then created an original program to address these needs. This program can be duplicated in other schools so if you are looking for ideas about how to meet the social and emotional needs of your classmates, this is the episode for you!

This episode highlights some of the rituals and beliefs of certain American Indian tribes as told by Beccah O'Brien. Beccah lost her sister and father as a teen and young adult. Beccah graciously shares some of the little-known traditions of American Indians and explains the beliefs about death in this culture. She talks about what it was like to lose these most important people and how her culture provided both gifts and challenges for her. Beccah can be reached at Beccah.obrien@gmail.com.

Today's conversation is with Rebekah Saltzman, an organization expert who has recently written a book about organizing in a Jewish tradition for all of life's major milestones and events. Inspired by her mom after her death, Rebekah's original goal was to make sure all mourners (in the Jewish tradition, a "mourner" is either a parent, sibling or child of the deceased) understood the rituals and laws regarding mourning. She does not claim to be a scholar or rabbi, but she offers advice as a person who has recently lost her mother. She wishes a guide like this was available to her when she needed it so she created it, inspired by her own loss, to help others in the same faith. 

For more information reach out to Rebekah at www.organizedjewishlife.com, balaganbegone.com, or rebekah@rebekahsaltzman.com.

This week, I talk with Ian Wolf, the Coordinator of Student Conduct and a case manager for the Behavioral Intervention Team at Bergen County College in New Jersey. We talk about behavior as a means of communication and how we often look at behavior as good or bad, appropriate or inappropriate. Sometimes we forget that behavior is a function of our feelings and environments and if we take a deeper dive into that behavior we may find the need for support instead of discipline or punishment.  We also talk about the struggles of many college students to get the support they need through traditional systems and what other, less traditional options may be available. We touch on the need for teachers to get support in the midst of trying to provide so much to their students as well. 

To contact Ian for more information, email him at Ianwolf1992@gmail.com.

It's a very common phrase- often used to comfort someone who is in a terrible amount of pain after the death of a loved one. In today's episode, we examine this phrase more closely and consider the consequences of assuming the amount of grief you experience is diectly related to the amont of love you felt for the person that died. 

This episode was dedicated to Michael Siminoff and Nicole Pruess from the Retinger family. 

For more information, contact Mandi Zucker at mzucker@inner-harbor.org or 908-292-8039. 

This episode explores 10 different ways to include the people that have died into your holiday observances. From gift giving to holidays meals, self care and traditions, we cover it all in a short podcast episode with tons of practical tips to make these holidays less stressful, more inclusive and respectful of your grief. Please reach out to us at mzucker@inner-harbor.org or 908-292-8039 if you are looking for support or education.

As mentioned in the podcast, here is a blessing you may want to include in your holidays:

Memory Candles
As we light these four candles in honor of you, we light one for our GRIEF, one for our COURAGE, one for our MEMORIES and one for our LOVE.

This candle represents our GRIEF. The pain of losing you is intense. It reminds us of the depth of our love for you.

This candle represents our COURAGE – to confront our sorrow. to comfort each other, to change our lives.

This light is in your MEMORY – the times we laughed, the times we cried, the times we were angry with each other, the silly things you did, the caring and joy you gave us.

This light is for the light of LOVE.

As we enter this holiday season, day by day we cherish the special place in our hearts that will always be reserved for you. We thank you for the gift your living brought to each of us. We love you.

~From Holiday Help: Coping for the Bereaved, by Sherry Gibson, B.S., R.N. and Sandra Graves, Ph.D.Candles in the Night

Jesse and Rachel are both Child Life Specialists at The Cancer Support Community of Central New Jersey.  What is a Child Life Specialist, you may ask? If you don't know, it's likely because you have never had a child in the hospital.  But if you have, you have hopefully experienced the benefit of having someone talk to you and your children about their diagnosis. This week on the podcast, we talk about how to explain different diagnoses to children and why the language matters even as they get older. We also talk about how to maintain connection and support during the pandemic if someone dies. For more information, reach out to Jesse or Rachel at jguzik@cancersupportcnj.org or Rwerner@cancersupportcnj.org.