Review Party Dot Com

Imagine, infinite and on-demand pizza. Just need to buy marinara and cheese cartridges from Chuck E Cheese Maxazon Emporium™!

This week we got some internet reviews for becoming a youth pastor with Karate Kid, getting slushed at 7/11, keyboarding maxing with a Steel Series, some crispy Garnier Fructis shampoo, and partaking in rare delights at the Northside Bakery. For the segment, we question the target audience of overpriced clothing catalogues in The Pages of Peterman! Run off another slice, Tony.

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There's an island out there full of babes just for you, man. You just have to imagine it as hard as you can. The babes are waiting for you.

This week we have internet reviews for khaki shorts at Kohl's return counter, going beyond the pale with Bro Glo sunless tan, giving toddlers "explosive" preworkout, and a wannabe shifter romance novel. For the segment, we take a new trivia game for a spin featuring some weird reviews, come guess along! The babes will be impressed if you score well, or if you don't.

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If the labor laws loosened, those McDoubles would be coming out mighty fast, is all I'm sayin',

This week we have some sick little internet reviews for an allegedly special ice maker, seeing Batman Villains in reality TV's "Beyond Scared Straight", those fancy electric water guns, going on a thirst-quenching warpath with Liquid Death tea flavors, and a bubble "bazooka". For the segment, we take a (Upon) Further Review of the fine works of infamous director Alan Smithee. Back to the mines when this ones over, boys!

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Gee Bill! How come your mom lets you eat two wieners?

This week we have some hot internet reviews for nasty little plastic water bottles, dangerously advancing temporary tattoo technology, throwing bricks at kiddie pools, an ugly and expensive but wonderful Stitch toy, and the dark implications of having a pet pig on a leash. For the segment, we once again are diving butt-first into the internet swamp (so you don't have to!) with a look at Craiglist's missed connections section.

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Man the orange juice cannons, you're going to need some extra vitamin C after this one.

We have internet reviews for black licorice twizzlers, My Chemical Romance's The Black Parade, a Tony Hawk skateboard, and 'Pitch Black'. For the segment, we take a look at a pile of Steam Reviews for arguably a video game 'Black Screen'. Hit the deck!

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When life gives you dirt, put it in some lemonade, drink it up mm yum yum good mmmmm yum I am powerful and full of minerals now.

This week on big episode 250 we have internet reviews for Banjo Kazooie AND Banjo Kazooie: Nut and Bolts, a Disney World-esque trip to the Wisconsin Grocery king Woodman's, getting dragged into the darkness by your track meet warmup running parachute, and some divisive workout powder. For the segment, we march to the bat of our own percussion with a Reviewer Redux on a_different_drummer. Thanks for helping us make 250! Here's to the next 250 big onez.

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Call me peanut 'cause I'm about to oil.

This week we got some hot and spicy internet reviews for a Piggly Wiggly in Talladega, bursting bully sticks dog treats, big ol' Tiger Tail massage rollers, a novel called 'Heartwood', sucking up some Taco Johns, and getting nerdy with 'Gachiakuta'. For the segment, we look at a whole pile of reviews for the game Squirrel with a Gun! Pass me a napkin.

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It's the most tenderloin of gummies.

This week we got some delectable internet reviews for the album Frizzle Fry by the very bassy Primus, Scooby Doo fruit snacks, a Valvoline Instant Oil Change in Tacoma, and those silly Magic Eye books. For the segment, we take the gloves off and do some Bareknuckle Letterboxding with a deep dive into the live action Snow White. You'll be reaching in the box for another pack after this one.

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It doesn't get much greener than this! And that's the terrifying part.

We do have internet reviews for clover-moss type chlorophyll supplements, saw palmetto extracts to mainline, Downer's Grove South high school, enjoying the soap opera for old men that is American Chopper, and partying with the Kids Next Door. For the segment, we see if it's a good idea to put Doom on your phone. Oh good green golly!

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Like watermelon leaking onto the other fruit, or a sucker left on the carpet, this episode will stick with you.

We have internet reviews for a presence in Steven's Restaurant, the possibilities of english muffins, kind of a review for the Temu app, Fantastic Four comics, and getting wild off turmeric supplements. For the segment, we dive into the slightly less sticky Pages of Peterman. Keep it sticky, ickies.

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Get lost in the ocean, under waves of cotton. Even though it’s summer, I know you’re getting those chilly willys at night, so let this Review Party soothe those bones.

We got internet reviews for getting jokey at Dave and Busters, being afraid of ‘Harley Quinn: Fartacular’, ‘Shadowhunters’ on Netflix, and reducing power on the Chevy Malibu. For the segment, we leave no business unfinished and deep dive into the Craigslist swamps.

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This episode really brings the whole room together!

We've got internet reviews for TV mounts, Wild Things Fur hat store, mushroom-shaped epoxy molds, 'Bug Wars', and the Trap Museum. For the segment, we get some a round of pretty unreasonable reviews from Amazon reviewer Reasonable Person. So wipe off your shoes and have a sit!

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Doesn't matter if your water bed is in a race car frame or not, that suckers liable to pop at anytime.

This week we wrangled some reviews for pre-toejammed high heals, protein-infused knock-off pop-tarts, gel-cooled aftermarket gamer headphone earmuffs, and a couple of rateyourmusic reviews featuring The Offspring and Bloodhound Gang. For the segment, a maximum amoutn of reviews for Pepto Bismal gets us pumped up. No jumping on this bed!

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Whoa whoa whoa, has disaster struck? Is your life a train wreck?

Well all aboard this very special episode of Review Party Dot Com, where we're drilling through reviews of the finest espadrilles, whipped cream sunscreen, a backpack exclusively for GIRLS (and Easter), and to brighten things up, our favorite anime of all time (and also the greatest). This segment packs a punch too, as we bite into a bushel of apple rankings!

Fix your whole life by listening.

This week we're treating you to some of the tastiest bits from episodes 80-89. We're talking LED lights and DJ Real Baby, a not so handy pizza cutter, the soy sweats and a solid dude, air and souls in cans, deeeeep cleanses, bum bum cream, and getting your kid to go to sleep.

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The results are in, and with the biggest upset of all time, it turns out Subaru knows how to make vehicles!

We have some reviews for The Chocolate Touch by Patrick Skene Catling, the Subaru Baja for the subie boys, Starved Rock State Park, and a Petco cat tree. For the segment, we read some lovely Sims patch notes. Zoom, zoom, zoom.

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Royal my flush and call me Jack 'cause this one's a doozie. Doosey? Doosie. I think I got it right the first time.

This week we have reviews for hosing down the bros at Nearly New Auto & Truck, purchasing Hershey's kisses, the 1up Pacman Arcade thing, absolutely Absolute Wonder Woman, and getting real sporty at Sports Clips. For the segment, we deep dive into Arthur's Valentine by Marc Brown for My Precious Max. I have it on good authority these aces are high, and the jokers may be wild!

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I'm scared of being scared.

This week we have internet reviews for a possibly horrible dentist in Louisiana, preworkout with a fun flavor, pressure cookers and all the things you shouldn't put in them, Joe's Hardware in Chicago, and an Indiana Jones themed Escape Room. For the segment, we take a deep dive in the strangely sometimes ubiquitous RC Cola. Ahhhh!

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Lasagna will never the same again.

This week we have internet reviews for fantastical light bulbs, L-tryptophan supplements, Passengers (2016), Miss Congeniality (2000), the new Iron Man comic (2024), and the world's largest Superman statue. For our segment, we say Thanks, Abby! with some readings from Dear Abby. You're going to love Mondays.

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This one comes with a lot of epiphanies, but not all of them are good.

We have got some brain busting internet reviews for Hindquarter in Kansas, the (newest version) Amazon Fire Stick, a folding message table that really gets around, zbiotics probiotic REALLYbiotic drinks, Big Chicken Town in Vancouver, and The Suds Hut in Montana. For the segment, we look at some momento mori-views for the late Jimmy Carter. He was on TV sometimes.

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We aren't leaving the first beautiful month of 2025 without a charming look back at what was. This great hit collection covers episode 57 to 78, which you could look at as the first quarter of the second year of Review Party Dot Com! It's amazing we can even speak in such terms. So, we hope you enjoy this fine presentation of goofs, bits, and as always, internet reviews!

From Episode 57, a review of Green Gobbler pipe cleaner, from Episode 59: kilt review! From episode 64, we look at those realistic tortilla print blankets. From Episode 70, into the pages of Corduroy by Don Freeman. And last not least, from Episode 78! The Illustrious TURKEY BASTER! Thank you everyone for your continued support and patronship! We love ya!

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You know when you go to the good butcher? Get the good meat? The good cuts? That’s this episode.

We got internet reviews for a fancy beach shirt, Gallagher's Pizza in Green Bay, Megan's Snoball Stand in Louisiana, Tina's Sweet Bake Shop in Cleveland, and The Citadel Theater in Illinois. You could say we're on location! And for the segment, we dive into some unfinished business over on Craigslist. Meaty.

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These sausages aren't easy to wrangle, sometimes you just have to knuckle up and get a good grip on there.

This week we have internet reviews for cardboard building blocks, the original Popeye cartoon short, Cinderheart Gaming in Oak Brook, Illinois, Elvis by Elvis Presly, and Gate's Barbeque in Kansas City. For the segment, we do a little internet review trivia. Can you knuckle-puck a sausage patty?

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It's been a long goof-off session and there's reason to believe, maybe this goof will be better than the last.

We got internet reviews for an AmericanInn, the new Wicked movie, Bionicle 2: Legends of Metru-Nui, refurbished PlayStation 2s, and Uncle Hugo's Science Fiction Bookstore. Count 'em!

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It is once again time to celebrate Chris-mas down here at Review Party. Strap into the sleigh and grab your favorite dreidel because it gets real crazy.

Featured are lovely holiday-adjacent internet reviews for elf dolls, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (1964), Friends with Benefits (2011), Victoria 3 on Steam, and new-age Tickle me Elmo. For the segment, we take a look at the history of Hallmark holiday cards. Ho ho ho and all that good stuff.

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When you want something done, sometimes you just have to heave and ho it. There's no way around that!

This week we got some internet reviews for a mysterious double handled object, candied yam recipes, the longevity and prosperity of seamonkeys, and fancy Ghirardelli hot cocoa. For the segment, we once again get knee deep in internet sewage over on Craigslist's Missed Connections section. Heave-ho me outta here!!!

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Rob Zombie would love this one.

Today we've got internet reviews for The New China Restaurant, a ground beef meat chopper, the french market in Glen Ellen, and the anime Dandadan. For a segment, we take a deep dive into the green bean casserole.

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We're talking big ol' hairy feet, man.

This week we've got internet reviews for cool caffeinated Crystal Light, the Mr. Miyagi Japanese Grill's oopsies, big ol' toe spacers, the fantastic (???) Street Fighter (1994) movie, and Jazzy Cakez trauma cakes. For the segment, we take a dive into the beloved Pages of Peterman.

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I know one thing: you crack that plastic seal under the lid and that peanut butter has already been messed with, you call the white. You get the president on the horn, America's most sacred tradition has be messed with and it's up to us to capture the buttery burglars.

We have internet reviews for 'The Illuminatus', pretending and imagining with ethernet cables, 'Unwrap Your Heart: It's Time for Mummies', and the album Take Me to Your Leader by King Geedorah. For the segment, we enjoy some high fashion with Big Dog. Keep your unsalted nuts handy!

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We got some problems with you, meat!

We also got internet reviews for Shakespeare's Macbeth, a delisted Amazon sex swing, Perkins American Food Company and Ghost Kitchen, and Absolute Batman! For the segment, we deep dive into the world of apple reviewing, red delicious style.

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Move over Doom, there’s a new “this shit runs on everything” in town! And yes, you can make Mickey’s Dick Smasher if you want, your park, man!

Internet reviews for Russel Wilson and his Pittsburgh Steelers, office printers, a beauty salon by Diva, and some more Trolli electric crawlers. For the segment, we put up our dukes and check out Con Air on Bareknuckle Letterboxding. No, we won’t be making you pay for the bathrooms.

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Here on this 226th installment of the Review Party Dot Com Podcast, we're getting real spooky with it. Halloween special time, yessir. Are you brave enough to handle this?

We've got scary reviews for a perilous pumpkin patch, an unsettling candy apple suckers sucker, a Little Tyke's playset for for a future self-respecting witch or warlock, the irrefutable Reese's cup, and some creepy crawly Trolli gummy worms. For the segment, we glance and glaze some Great Reviews of History with a look at The Creature from the Black Lagoon.

Sounds terrifying, I know. But we have some laughs along the way!

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Make no mistakes here, this podcast is way less than 90% water. Or however much percent watermelon is, I refuse to interrupt writing this description to google it.

We have internet reviews for Monster "Rehab" energy drinks, drive-thru madness at Burger King in Madison, the Mortal Kombat movie (the 90s one), and The Misfit's Static Age album. For the segment, we dive into some Unfinished Business over on the Chicago suburb Craigslist pages. Seedless! Seedless! We should have done seedless! You imbeciles!

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I'm starting to think, just keep the foot on the gas. You'll get a tummy ache, but there's worse things in the world. The bad things you can't find on the open road! Put 'em behind you, and turn on the podcast, for some:

Reviews for The Iron Giant and the state of animation in 1999, Popeye's by a guy named Dark Bloodshed, crispy onions on subscription, steamy alien romance novels, and the illustrious Taco Hut. For the segment, we dip our toes into the hot oil that is Overcooked 2.

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We got green goo, we got blue slime, we got orange viscous fluid. Vats of it! Wholesale style. Come on down and get a whiskey barrel full of ooze!

We have internet reviews for old people spearmint candy, the Rugrats reboot, a horse racing novel, and a quaint little McDonalds. For the segment, we deep dive into reviews for the late, great Bob Newhart. Shout out my mucus.

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They may say ball is life, but what happens if you remove the ball from your ego entirely? And don’t even get me started on that sauce and getting lost in it!

Reviews for Ali’s Bargain Outlet, the Magic 8-ball, assorted candies, and the Guggenheim museum of modern art. For the segment, we say Thanks, Abbey! with some readings from Dear Abbey. Alright fine, we ball.

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Personally, I'm kind of in the mood for some bad masseuse right now. Just put me in a medieval torture device and we can really work on some of these knots.

Reviews for a massage parlor, Ronald Reagan's boyhood home, Madagascar 2, refurbished GameCubes, and novelty cat gloves. For the segment, we have a bunch of a reviews from a fellow named Kelvin. Oh, that's the spot!

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A sewer is a sewer is a sewer is a sewer is a sewer.

Internet reviews for a quirky coffee mug, 'Arthur's Chicken Pox', silver gel lotion, an apron with egg pockets, and Refresh gum. In the segment we deep dive into a bunch of reviews from a strange fellow named Joseph. Consider this drain unclogged.

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Sometimes, you have turn it down! Down to the tan!

We've got internet reviews for toilet bowl cleaner, the Cajun Boil & Bar, essential oils, and "This Ho Got Roaches in Her Crib: An Urban Satire". We also do a deep dive into the history of M&M colors. Jam packed with vibes!

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My gains are holy.

Internet reviews for Sun Tzu's Art of War, Terminator 2, guava paste, holy water from the Jordan river, and the Mandarake complex in Tokyo. My faith is maxed.

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This fudge will take your breathe away.

We've got internet reviews for scalloped edged napkins, Fruit Stripe gummy candy, maple walnut fudge, a mini freezer, and diet dog food. For the segment, we take a visit to Craigslist for some Unfinished Business. I love this fudge!

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We can rebake it; we can make it tastier.

This week we have reviews for foot cream, a McDonald's in Georgia, a Pharmacy-Gun store combo in Mississippi, sugar free gum, Welch’s Grape Juice (but most Walmart delivery), and vegan pizza crust. For the segment, we go into relatively new but very cherish corner of the internet for the first time: Hideo Kojima Twitter for some movie reviews. Extra sauce and cheese, please!

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Just because they look like keys to a Volvo, doesn't mean they're keys to a Volvo.

We've got reviews for Burger Antics, Jamaican coffee, lemon spaghetti recipes, Beyblade stadiums, and more Airheads. For the segment we have a whole bunch of movie dudes from the Letterboxd beast Cinnamon Toast Crud. Give me back my keys, I'm good to drive.

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This big old box has got a big old vibe and we're trying to get to the bottom of it. Just don't close the top, I'm claustrophobic.

This week we have reviews for an air fryer, grenade-shaped hot sauce, Gorillaz by Gorillaz, Twister, Twisters, and Yoyogi Park. In the segment we gather a whole bunch of steam reviews for Balatro.

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We're talking mangoes, man. You ever nosh one of those bad mothers on a rainy day? One of those rainy days were the ground gets steamy? And then you feel steamy? and then the mango juice is bursting? This episode is like that.

This week we have reviews for 'Love and Monsters', The Incredible Hulk Ultimate Destruction for the PS2, 'Hunter: The Storm Brothers' romantic novel, and super movie accurate Toy Story Rex toy. On the segment, we get again get steamed up with a extra sensual edition of From the Pages of J. Peterman. Take a nosh!

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It's all fun and shimmy until those feet germs reach your jimmy, as the old saying goes. Here at Review Party, we put a lot of stock in old sayings, but if old timey nonsense doesn't make sense to you, let us lay it out: After every semester, cast your shower shoes into the fires of Mordor and go to Kohl's and get some fresh ones.

This week we have reviews for those shower shoes, Ditka's bar and grill, sheets (for the guest room), X-men '97, the Hulk Gamecube controller. For the segment, we deep dive into the mystery (and some reviews) that is "mystery" flavored Air Heads. Put those slides on, it gets messy!

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Chocolate chip, amen.

We have reviews for a Rock Band mic, cookies, body bounce body bumpers, fiji water, and Boston Market. For the segment, a deep dive in to Ayo Edibiri's Letterboxd.

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Four birthdays later, we pretty much feel the same. The reviews feel the same. The laughs feel the same. These are all good things, we love this party. And, we remember these feels, like smelling a smell you smelled a long time ago and you're not sure what the smell is but it smells good and scratches your brain nicely.

For our birthday we brought reviews for Chuck E Cheese, The Four Seasons Orlando Resort, 'Happy Birthday to Me', 'Four: A Dark Reverse Harem Romance', birthday cake cookies, 'Fantastic Four' (2005), and Qdoba. We deep dive into Party City as well! Yeah! It's a great party. Always has been, always will be.

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Nothing quite like getting too close to that sun. You just have GOT to see it up close sometime!

In this episode, get some up close reviews of a big buoyant pool ball, a shark attack sushi plate, the Chavarri Palace in Spain, Two Guy a Girl and a Pizza Place, and a little hammock for camping. On the segment, we say "Thanks, Abby!" with some reading from Dear Abby. Extra wax!

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Call up Slippery Pete and Schlomo because its going to be a bumpy hop!

We have reviews for Costco and it's bakery, a baby play mat, kites, L-Theanine supplements, and Monster Hunter Now. Now hop off that lily pad and go for that high score!

Brent's Monster Hunter: Now stuff-

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