Secret Keepers Club

HELLO and welcome to another episode with your friends at Secret Keepers Club. Emma is out for one more week, and Carly is joined by their friend and comedian Rosebud Baker, from Amazons Inside Jokes and the Justin Bieber themed podcast Two Less Lonely Girls. Carly gives viral video advice for Rosebud’s dog, her hate for the ASPCA (which is misplaced for PETA) and a crazy FMK which gives insight into Rosebuds dating habits!

We're still missing Emma while she's in LA, but it's okay because Carly's mom is substitute secret keeper for the second week running. The Aquilinos take care of some New Year's shopping, ruin the color red, and answer your questions. Hug, Marry, Kill: Kanye West, Offset, DJ Khaled

Emma and Carly discuss their resolutions. What should you do if every guy you hook up with seems to be in a relationship? We talk about Emma’s identity theft. We hear from a listener that is struggling with an unexpected pregnancy with her boyfriend.

FMK: Eric (Little mermaid), The Beast (beauty and the beast), Shang (Mulan)

After a month long hiatus from recording in person, Emma and Carly catch up on life, work, and potentially the most embarrassing thing to happen in Carly’s life to date! Carly saved it to tell on the podcast! Is it the worst thing ever? Will things be okay? It’s an emotional roller coaster in all the right ways!

Episode 23 by Secret Keepers Club

Should you feel guilty if you are not officially dating someone and you’ve met someone new? We hear from a listener that moved away from home to be with her man and now feels like she may have made a mistake. How do you meet a man if you are a independent career driven single lady ?

FMK: Kris, Kim, Kendall
BONUS FMK: HORROR MOVIE EDITION

Emma found out why she has been poopin’ her pants. Carly’s arch nemesis writes us an email. Should you act on having a sex with a girl for the first time if you’re in a happy relationship? Should you see your ex one last time if you still love him and can’t get him out of your head? Should you tell a guys fiancè he’s been cheating on her?

FMK - Tom Hardy, Ryan Gosling, Liam Hemsworth

We talk about donuts, giving gifts, and who would win in a fight if we fist fought. A listener wants to know why she feels embarrassed about farting in front of her partner. We talk to Carly’s mom about Cornish hens, farting, the key to a long marriage, and if cheesecake is a cake. We talk more about farting. How do you find someone in the LGBTQ community to have a real relationship with if you are a little intimidated of the scene? Are you allowed to ask a guy you’ve only known for two weeks if he is sleeping with someone else/if he sees a future with you/what’s going on with his ex girlfriend that you found out about because stalked her on Instagram? We ask Chris/future baby daddy if it would be “too much too soon.”

FMK: Singers, drummers, Guitar players.

How can you tell if he’s a f-boy or a BF ? A male listener wants to know how to deal with his girlfriend wanting the dog in the bedroom while they....ya know. How do you get your ex out of your head ? What do you look for in a significant other?

FMK: Lance Bass, Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez - a very in depth discussion about if Backstreet Boys are better than N*SYNC

Carly and Emma dive into the outcome of Carly’s recent Blood Facial, Emma considering Accutane, Carly’s elaborate family game of Chopped, and how Emma measures pasta sauce...one handful at a time. Secret Keepers ask about following ones boyfriends ex on social media and how to disengage the compare and dispare game, what happens when your husband is your close friend BUT the attraction is gone, and much more

FMK WITH Paula Dean, Amanda Bynes, or Tonya Harding.

Update on Mommas boy girl. What to do if your friends are shaming you if you aren’t available to hang out with them as often as they’d like? What do you do when a guy is in love with you and you don’t love him?/ what do you do if you’re in love with your guy fringed?

FMK: Linda Blecher, Lois griffin, Marge Simpson.

In depth discussion about if you would go to another planet and never come back. Can you be friends with a professional athlete that is married and wants to fly you out to a game? What do you do if your boyfriend never goes down on you? How do you rid a demon ex out of your mind?

FMK: Susan Boyle, Mariah Carey, Adele.

Carly and Emma dive into the merits of labels, how to react if someone says you taste like chlamydia, and if its worth it to come out as bi – if you are in a happy, monogamous, straight marriage. PLUS Carly’s reaction to Emma’s most bazar childhood secret yet... FMK

FMK: STEVE IRWIN, MISTER ROGERS, LAVAR BURTON

Listener wants to know if he should edit his stand up set if his ex is going to be in the crowd. We discuss the difference between asexual and “acommittal” (which is a word we made up). And also give absolutely terrible advice to a listener that needs work on her gay-dar.

FMK: QUEER EYE EDITION: ANTONI, KARAMO, JONATHAN.

Emma had another accident. Listener wants to know if she should tell her boyfriend that she slept with his best friend/roommate while they were on a break. Should you risk a friendship ending to see if a relationship could be possible?

How long do you wait for him to propose if you’ve already been together for 7 years ? FMK: Seth Rogen, James Franco, Jonah hill

Emma saw the guy she gave a blowjob to.

Carly is single again after being in a very long one month relationship. Guy can’t get it up after he had sex with a porn star and contracted a treatable STD, a woman listener wants to know when to begin maintaining her mustache. Follow up from a listener who’s question was answered about when to say “I love you”. A food FMK featuring Nachos, wings, and mozerella sticks. And a person FMK featuring DJ khaled, Mr.Bean, and Bob Ross.

Carly and Emma welcome you to another episode of Secret Keepers Club, where they touch on such topics as Gold Teeth, leaky brain, dry BJs and spineless Momma’s boys.