Confessions of a Queer Black Boy.

not much more to say! I hope you are well!

The girls that get it, get it.

Surrendering is a journey and one that every bad bitch must go through. Chill out with me while I update you on some recent life events. 

Music used: Produced by IMPHERNO & Oliver Zoega

Y'all know imma keep it real. I've been frustrated as hell with life and it's been keeping me down ... but I'm ready to STAND UP. I'm learning that life is all about remembering who you are through the bs. This episode is about remembering who I AM and why I do what I do. In the words of Aaliyah, "If at first you don't succeed, then dust yourself off and try again." Here's me, trying again.

I know — a part of you just jumped. Was it the side of you that's a servant to everyone else's needs/desires? Or ... was it the side of you that is ready to be free from the shackles of people pleasing?? from one bad b¡tch to another, do better and set some boundaries!

some days feel like a breeze, and some days feel hard as f*ck. on the days when nothing seems to be going right, the answers lie in how much you are able to release and surrender to the natural currents of life. stop forcing it, babe! just be! 

rediscovering one's true self means getting in touch with past dreams and fantasies. are you going to allow your authentic self to live, or keep living the life that was handed to you?

even this episode was late ... what can I say? blame it on life! cheers, to being alive and getting better! here's your reminder to treat yourself with kindness. happy to be back and catching y'all up on life. talk soon besties! xo

23 was a whirlwind ... 24, please be nice. 😅 in this episode, I wanna discuss some of the best lessons 23 has taught me. 

oh hey, happy new year! I hope you're well! I know it's been a while and I'm here to explain. let's chat!

I should have listened to hannah montana when she said" nobody's perfect, I got to work it, again and again til I get it right". 

change can be beautiful... but it also can be hard as f*ck! didn't retrograde end already? why do I feel like this? 

wanna know a secret? not putting limitations on yourself is really the wave. it's what all the cool kids are doing ... don't be lame. do the things that get you out of your comfort zone! 

I love you all! From one bad bitch to another! ❤️XX

do you often feel disappointed in other human beings? tired of having to teach people how to be decent? expecting "you" from others? STOP and choose yourself!

Confessions of a Queer ass Black Boy is officially 1 year old! I am so damn proud of the work that I have done and the community that it has built. My heart is full ❤️. I am ready to start expressing myself through the podcast again and I hope you all are ready to listen! lol. I want to let go of my old and negative ways of thinking - ready for better! I hope that you are too! xx

no explanation needed. let's work through some things together.

Fav episode alert!! In this episode, Ellis virtually sits down with Creative Writer & Wellness Advocate, Kiersten Brydie (@Naturallykbiggie)! This episode is all about taking care of yourself holistically! We all need that kick and here is yours!

**I do not own the rights to the music used!

confessions of a queer ass black boy is now coming to you "live" from the thicc apple!!! I guess manifestation actually works?? cool. 

do you have a hard time letting go of old shit? yeah me too. let's talk about it. 

- Ellis 

hey, it's been a while ... but we're BACK. and tbh better than ever! 

in this episode, I wanna talk about going after your goals and manifesting your shit! 

go ahead and get you some tea and let's vibe lol. 

in such weird times, it is easy to forget the things that make you happy. in this episode Ellis list some of the weird things that he has grown fond of in 2020. what are you grateful for?

one thing that I am sure about is that you don't know how much power you have within yourself! your mind is such a beautiful and powerful thing but more than likely, you aren't using it to its best ability. It's meant to help you manifest and attract all of the things you want. 

in this episode, I want to talk about the power we yield simply with our minds and how it can help us get out of a disempowered state. 

being in a rut is not fun. your creativity is stifled. you don't feel like dealing with people. you don't even feel like getting out of bed. in this episode listen while Ellis lists his tip and tricks about getting out of a rut! relatable af.

*like and share this episode on your story. tag @ellisxmonte 

**"free for use" music used!

"has dating ever been easy? or is it just me? or maybe it's a generational thing? whatever it is, I wanna get to the bottom of it and talk with some of my closest friends about it. in this episode, I am joined by my friends Kianna, Mia, Niya, and Bashel to talk about our experiences with dating. we give some advice, share some crazy stories, and laugh a lot! I hope you enjoy

****I do not own the rights to the music used. 

life has been crazy and some times we just gotta take a break and reevaluate what really matters. you know what matters? friends!! lets talk about friends and how quarantine has made us reimagine our relationships!

"self-love is a journey that we all must take".

in this episode, Ellis collaborates with Aubrei Hayes (@aubhayes_) to talk about being a confident person and their journey to self-love. it's all love. 

*I do not own the rights to the music used in episode*

in this episode, Ellis is joined by Roderick (@xrwoodruff) & Marshawn (@shawnjfrencha) to talk about the memoir/manifesto,  "all boys aren't blue" written by George M. Johnson. 

Summary of the book: "In a series of personal essays, prominent journalist and LGBTQIA+ activist George M. Johnson explores his childhood, adolescence, and college years in New Jersey and Virginia. From the memories of getting his teeth kicked out by bullies at age five, to flea marketing with his loving grandmother, to his first sexual relationships, this young-adult memoir weaves together the trials and triumphs faced by Black queer boys."

sometimes we allow ourselves to live in a disempowered state. constantly second-guessing and not being kind to ourselves. this state is not okay at all. listen while Ellis works through the tendencies that keep him in a disempowered state, and how he hopes to change it. the general message of the episode: be the bad, unapologetic, and amazing person that you want to be. Stop holding yourself back!

the title speaks for itself. life can make you feel like you're just going through the motions. sometimes to combat these feelings we need to move with intention and find balance in the shitshow called "life". 

** I do not own the rights to the music 

relationships are hard. what would you tell your younger self to save you from the stress and heartbreak? take a listen while Ellis, along with his best friend Gigi unpack their past relationships, and the lessons they've learned. 

***I do not own the rights to the music used. 

**please excuse background noise lol. 

letting go of toxic situationships, reading the signs, focusing on you... not always easy. but always necessary. in this episode, Ellis speaks on the pains of growing up and being 22. 

*** I do not own the rights to any of this music. 

is it retrograde? why is life so "blah" right now? is this just another effect from quarantine? in this episode, Ellis talks about life and all of the things he's dealing with. it's time to take a break. it's time to shake some things up and get out of our quarantine-routine. life isn't always so picture perfect and Ellis is realizing that. 

**All music is free for non-profit use. I do not own any rights. 

social media is a beautiful thing. at the same time, it can be a bitch. the endless scrolling, comparisons, self-doubt, all deadly to your mental health. in this episode Ellis is joined by his sister/friend Mahogani to talk about their experiences with social media.  this is not a bashing of social media platforms, but a dive into the effects it can have on young people.

** I do not own any rights to the music used in this podcast

we all have insecurities. sometimes those insecurities stop us from being great. in this episode, Ellis discusses his "perfectionist" mindset and how he's had to move past it.  this episode talks about the pressures that the outside world can put on us and why we have to live by our own standards. 

in this episode, Ellis explores his feelings of loneliness. 

in this team-up with Elijah Johnson, Ellis tackles the black gay "hook-up" culture. why is it so complex? Ellis and Elijah talk about their experiences within the scene and share some well-learned advice.  

** I do not own the rights to any of the music in this podcast!

in the first episode of "confessions of a queer ass black boy", Ellis talks about starting something new. Ellis also talks about what he has been up to during and post-quarantine and the lessons that he's learned.