From Believing to Being
By From Believing to Being
Join Karen and Dave, two former Evangelical Christians, as they explore topics like deconstruction, Christianity, mysticism, and consciousness. But most importantly, they discuss this new way of being in the midst of parenting, careers, and going about daily life.
From Believing to BeingAug 13, 2022
The relationships between power, selfishness, value, and purpose
New thoughts on suffering, purpose, and deconditioning
How to handle our emotions
If we're not our emotions, what do we do with them? In this episode, we discuss how to handle emotions and what to do with the especially difficult ones. Dave shares the acronymn phrase R.A.I.D. on A.N.T.S, as one approach to dealing with our feelings. We dive deep into the idea of compassion and the role it plays for ourselves and others, and look at how being detached or disidentified with our emotions eventually enables us to be more loving and understanding people.
Resources mentioned:
"Being aware of being aware" by Rupert Spira
"The End of Night" by Paul Bogard
"You made it weird" podcast with Pete Holmes
R.A.I.N. (Recognize, Allow/Accept, Investigate, Nurture)
R.A.I.D. on A.N.T.S. (Recognize, Allow/Accept, Investigate, Detach/Disidentify on Automatic Negative Thoughts)
Surrender, stillness, and recognizing inner resistance
Resources Mentioned
From Believing to Being podcast - episode 7
Karen's Blog post: www.inspiredtofaith.com/2019/03/15/be-still-doesnt-mean-what-you-think-it-does/
"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle
"Resurrecting Jesus" by Adyashanti
"Stillness Speaks" by Eckhart Tolle
The Taoist concept of wu-wei
Self-investigation & Strategies on being in the world
In this episode, we follow up on our last one by asking the question, "How can we know what to do with events outside of our direct experience, if we are not actually investigating the experience we ARE having?" We discuss the maturation process that is necessary to embrace the mystery of this life and how to lean into the uncertainty that is part of being human. Doing this intense self-investigation takes time and courage in this world of distraction, but we offer that the deep peace on the other side is worth it.
Resources mentioned:
"Dark Night of the Soul" experience, as described by St. John of the Cross
Digital Minimalism & Deep Work by Cal Newport
7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey
Integral Theory of Spiritual Development
The Difference between Neo-Advaita and Advaita with Francis Lucille
How do we relate to events outside our direct experience?
This week Karen & Dave touch on the current abortion debate and the Ukraine/Russia conflict, ultimately asking the question, "What do we do with events that are outside of our current experience?" We consider the concepts of neutrality vs. apathy vs. observing as we wrestle with some of the non-dual teachings and look at how our perspectives on social justice matters have shifted as we deepen into embracing the present moment.
Resources Mentioned
Justice Alito's leaked draft opinion of Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health
Rupert Spira's conversation with woman in Ukraine
Adyashanti's Book "End of Your World"
Eckhart Tolle's book "Power of Now"
Mooji quote: "Live as though you don't exist; like you are two eyeballs floating in space with nothing behind them.
No brain attached. Not even hair - Nothing. There is a place inside your own heart, inside your own being that knows the kind of seemingly foolish things I speak of and it is totally thrilled to be reminded of this infinite expanse and infinite joy that it is. Find this place."
What is thinking? And what is our relationship to it?
Do you think too much? Do you consider yourself an "over-thinker"? In this episode, we think and talk about our thoughts. Where do they come from? Do we have to have so many? Is thinking a cause of suffering and can we control what we think about? We offer up some practical exercises we've used to help separate ourselves from our thoughts, and touch on whether positive and negative thoughts should be handled the same. This episode will make you look at your mind differently and get you thinking more deeply and critically about all the things you think about!
Sources Mentioned
Sam Harris (and his talk "Where do thoughts come from?")
Waking Up - A guide to spirituality without religion by Sam Harris
Pete Holmes podcast with Michael Shur
Michael Shur's new book, How to be Perfect
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening by Cynthia Bourgeault
The End of Your World: straight talk about the nature of enlightenment by Adyashanti
The role of "self-help" in the spiritual journey
Resources mentioned:
The Enneagram
The Strengths test
Joe Dispenza and his book "Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself"
The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
Mindfulness
Are law of attraction, manifestation, and self-help practices "spiritual bullshit"?
This episode may strike a nerve. We discuss law of attraction and manifestation, and whether they are "pitfalls" that just seek to satisfy the ego. Do these pseudo-spiritual pursuits have a role to play in the spiritual journey? These concepts are so prevalent in today's spiritual circles, yet are they truly the way to find peace and joy? And, how does law of attraction fit in with the non-dual teachings that we are not our thoughts or our feelings? Finally, we consider how we un-enlighten ourselves by getting hooked into these ideas of abundance, and how LOA and similar ideas conflict with the actual lives and ways of being of the great spiritual teachers.
Resources mentioned:
"How to recognize spiritual bullshit" with Awaken Insight (aka Nada)
"Creating your reality will prove itself to be empty" with Jac O'Keefe
Zen Shorts by Jon J. Muth (Children's book of zen stories)
The End of Your World: Uncensored straight-talk on the nature of enlightenment by Adyashanti
Ego as a verb, talk by Adyashanti
Draw the circle by Mark Batterson
Extras:
Promises and pitfalls of the spiritual path with Ram Dass
If I am universal consciousness, why can't I manifest what I want? with Francis Lucille
Is hope like a drug?
We all know what it is to hope, to experience that magical mix of positive expectation and deep desire. And hope can often feel necessary to get us through times of difficult suffering, but can it also prevent us from maturing into a deeper spirituality? Do we need hope? Can you cling to hope and be "awakened" at the same time? Is hope intoxicating, but detrimental, like a drug? And if we don't lean into hope, then what is the alternative? These are just a few of the ideas and questions we explore in this week's episode.
Resources Mentioned
Adyashanti - "The End of Your World: Uncensored straight talk about the nature of enlightenment"
Alan Watts muddy waters quote from his book The Zen Way “As muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone, it could be argued that those who sit quietly and do nothing are making one of the best possible contributions to a world in turmoil.”
Integral theory model of spiritual development with Ken Wilbur
Karma yoga, a concept from the Bhagavad Gita, referenced by Eckhart Tolle in The Power of Now
Bible references: Matthew 19:24 (easier for camel to go through the eye of a needle than a rich man to get into Heaven); temptations of christ; book of John
Enlightenment - Recognizing that we're all just cookie dough
In this episode, we talk about the buzz words "enlightenment" and "awakening". What are they? Are they the same thing? Do they make you superior to others? Do they mean you've found some secret to life that makes you special? We don't really have any answers, but we raise all these questions and more and talk about what our experience has been and how we are understanding these ideas right now. Karen shares a helpful cookie dough analogy and discusses how difficult these non-dual teachings can be to actually live out in the real world. Dave gets weird by asking the question "Am I even a person?" and shares his thoughts on how going deep into this stuff can bring so much peace but also appears to be at odds with the way most people see the world.
Resources mentioned:
Alan Watts describing "awakening"
Rupert Spira discusses the screen analogy and "enlightenment"
Who (or What) is God?
In this week's episode, we essentially admit that, when it comes to "God" {or whatever it is that has brought this life experience into being}, we're like dogs trying to understand the internet. Ha! We talk about how we understand "God" today, whether modern humanity is God pretending it's not God, and how the search for certainty and truth about God can lead us to embrace its mystery. We address the idea that we can't really know exactly WHAT we are - or what God is - due to our inherent human limitations, and ask the question "Do we even NEED to understand God?" Towards the end, we venture into more sensitive territory about whether God/consciousness cares about this experience, what to do about pain and suffering, and how, if nothing else, our experience as humans allows God to show love to itself.
Alan Watts Video - "Happiness is NOT the Meaning of Life"
Pete Holmes podcast "You made it weird"
Brief summary of the life of Siddartha/Buddha
I am That by Nisaraghadatta Maharaj
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
Dave's Journey - Finding peace underneath the brokenness
In this episode, Dave shares more about his spiritual journey. Leveraging the metaphor of Kintsugi, he shares about how it was the seasons and moments of brokenness that allowed for a deeper peace and equanimity to prevail. Life hardships like family rifts, substance abuse, mental health, dating/relationships, theological shifts, church drama, and felt rejection all served as experiential breaking points, ultimately leading to a heighted awareness of and access to the impenetrable and ineffable peace, available to us all.
Resources mentioned:
Kintsugi - repairing broken pottery with gold
12 steps of AA
Explore God - The 7 Big Questions
Richard Rohr - the first of his videos Dave watched in 2019, where he suspected Richard might be "heretical", but was also very curious
A.W. Tozer - The Pursuit of God
Contact:
E-mail: frombelievingtobeing@gmail.com
Karen Instagram: @inspiredtofaith
Dave Instagram: @dave.navratil
Karen & her brother talk church, UFO's, past lives, the rapture, & consciousness
This week, Karen's brother Brian joins her for a conversation about growing up amongst church confusion, leadership scandals, and parents who pushed the End Times narratives. They also discuss losing their dad to cancer, Brian's interest in UFO's, African alien encounters, and the idea that we are trying to "recreate" an experience of universal consciousness through technology.
Ep. 9 - Essence: the "I" that remains when all else falls away
In this episode, we revisit the question of "Who am I?" with a closer look at the differences and relationship between the "Big I" and the "Little I." As humans, we have an inherent "ego" that is necessary, but does it have to stay as the locus of control in our lives? What happens when we start shifting to the "Big I" perspective? We also discuss the many roles we play, how our views on death have changed, and what it means to loosen the attachment to our egoic self. We offer some theories and metaphors on what the "Big I" is and how we are understanding it, and Dave sets out a comparison to the biblical story of Abraham & Isaac.
Resources mentioned:
Anatta and Advaita philosophies
"Man cannot live without God, but God cannot live without man either. Without man, God wouldn’t know he existed."– Meister Eckhart
"Enlightenment is a destructive process. It has nothing to do with becoming better or being happier. Enlightenment is the crumbling away of untruth. It’s seeing through the facade of pretense. It’s the complete eradication of everything we imagined to be true."– Adyashanti
Adyashanti - Definition of Ego as a verb
The emperor with no clothes
Ramana Maharshi and the screen metaphor
Michael Gungor - THIS
Don't look up on Netflix
Mooji - consciousness is like a candle
Eckhart Tolle - A new earth truth #2 "This, too, shall pass."
Nisargadatta Maharaj - "Wisdom tells me I am nothing, love tells me I am everything, between the two my life flows"
Mooji - "If you don't know who you are, how can you know anything?"
Contact:
frombelievingtobeing@gmail.com
Ep. 8 - Covid, Life, and thoughts on suffering
In this episode, we distinguish between pain and "suffering," and our experiences in learning the difference. Using the CoVid-19 pandemic and parenting as real-world examples, we discuss approaches to dealing with acute and "slow-burn" suffering and how these strategies challenge and change us. We touch on the ideas of cultural conditioning, being in the present moment, stepping out of the normal grind, and leaning into a deeper understanding of who we truly are.
Resources mentioned
Rupert Spira's talk on grace (Karen admits she totally botched Spira's explanation of grace. She encourages you to watch these videos instead!)
Rupert Spira's other talk referencing grace
J. Krishnamurti's quote "This is my secret," he said. "I don't mind what happens." (Karen misattributed this quote to Ramana Maharshi, although we think he probably would have said the same thing.)
Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening by Cynthia Bourgeault
Alan Watts video on yin/yang: Short version | Long Version
Contact
frombelievingtobeing@gmail.com
Ep. 7 - Surrender and learning to trust
In this episode, we talk about the “theme” of surrender and how it is an on-going practice, while at the same time the only option we have. We share what surrendering has looked like in our lives and how it’s reminiscent of what we were taught to do as christians, yet very different. Karen relates a jellyfish metaphor that offers practical wisdom for how we can surrender more deeply to the present moment and not get so attached to the past or an imagined future. Dave offers some visualization and meditation practices that can help ground us in the now and bring us to a place that is “beyond thinking.” We wrap up the podcast with the real-life struggles of learning to trust and the temptation to keep living under the illusion of control.
Resources mentioned
Meister Eckhart - Book of the heart: Meditations for the restless soul
Becoming the Bravest Woman you know by Karen Holmes (about the jellyfish metaphor)
Carl Sagan's "Pale blue dot" quote
"Look again at that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there--on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam."
Contact
frombelievingtobeing@gmail.com
Ep. 6 - Who is Jesus to us now?
In this Christmas episode, we talk about Jesus and how our “relationship” and views on him have evolved during our faith deconstruction. We touch on the mythological aspects of Jesus, what it means to be a disciple, and at what point clinging to Jesus could actually prevent us from moving forward on a spiritual path. We ponder Jesus' roles as a guru, a crutch, a friend, a king, a Buddhist. Dave also brings up whether devotion to a guru/savior indicates an inherent desire for a physical representation of “God."
Resources mentioned:
How Winston Delivered Christmas by Alex T. Smith
I am that by Nisargadatta Maharaj
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
Henri Nouwen (Following Jesus)
Drummer Boy by For King & Country
Contact:
Ep. 5 - Spiritual Paths (or non-paths...)
*note: reference to suicide around ~50mins.
In this episode, we discuss the concept of "spiritual paths." Are we all on a spiritual path? Is it necessary to follow a specific path? Is there an end to the spiritual path? We talk about the various types of spiritual journeys out there, gleaning from our experience of being firmly on the evangelical Christian path to now pursuing more mystical and "outside the box" ways of being.
Spiritual exercise: do a sit-up or push-up every time we say "path" ;)
Quotes:
"The ego loves a journey"
"Destinations are all ego games" - Various
"Before enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment; chop wood, carry water" - Zen Proverb
Resources Mentioned:
Rupert Spira talk comparing the direct path and progressive paths
Mo Willems Book - Waiting is not Easy
Contact:
Ep. 4 - From Fear to Fun: saying goodbye to certainty
In this episode, we discuss what originally led us to become evangelical Christians and how those motivations have evolved as we've embraced new spiritual perspectives. Dave shares how hitting rock bottom with a drinking problem led him to find spirituality as an adult. Karen discusses the relief and security of being drawn to a guiding hand. We discuss what we miss from our time as evangelical Christians, but also how, ultimately, we lived so much in fear.
We trace our journeys from that religion of certainty to where we are now - being more free in this place of "unknowing" and holding all beliefs loosely. Finally, we talk about how we've been dropping the judgments of ourselves and others, and what it really means to love yourself.
Resources Mentioned
Richard Rohr as a "gateway drug" to deconstruction
Another Name for Everything Podcast
Ken Wilber - Integral Theory
Waking up, Cleaning up, Growing up, Showing up
Sam Harris
"Consciousness is the only thing in this world that we can be sure is not an illusion"
Meister Eckhart
Book of the Heart
Advaita Vedanta (Nonduality)
Other quotes
"The only thing I know is that I know nothing" - Plato
"And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." - Matthew 18:3
"I say that I want love, but really I want total acceptance. A new way to think about love is acceptance. Self-love is accepting all the parts of yourself that you wish didn't exist" - Quote from Karen
Contact
Ep. 3 - Practicing "Presence" in everyday life
In this episode, we talk about practicing "presence" amidst the chaos and frustrations of everyday life. What does it mean to be present? What are the benefits? We share how we've been learning to not focus so much on the past or on the future, but really taking life moment by moment (i.e. being in the now). We also offer up some practical ways to start practicing presence today so you can implement these ideas in your own life.
Some of the other themes we touch on include:
- Benefits of being present to shift from some event ruining your entire day vs. ruining 20 minutes
- Gateways into deeper presence: In this moment are there any problems? Where are your feet? Do you feel a sense of aliveness in your hands?
- The counter cultural nature of being present (as compared to constantly thinking about the 'next thing')
Quotes:
"What you resist persists, what you accept transforms" - Carl Jung
"I no longer have any use for the past" - Eckhart Tolle
Resources mentioned:
Pete Holmes
Podcast- You Made it Weird with Sharon Salzberg
Eckhart Tolle
Book - Power of Now
Thich Naht Hanh
Contact
Ep. 2 - Who Am I? (when I'm no longer a Christian)
In this episode, we discuss what it’s like to lose your identity as a Christian and the subsequent challenge of finding a new way to belong so you can experience that feeling of community. We define “faith deconstruction” and some of the joys and pitfalls of this experience. Eventually we hit upon “consciousness” and what it means to really go deep into the “I” of who am I? We touch upon losing one’s sense of meaning and purpose and how that can open up a whole new world of possibility and hope and enjoyment. Underlining this whole episode is the acknowledgement that you are not what you think you are… and it’s that recognition that sets the stage for an incredible, new kind of spiritual journey.
Resources Mentioned
Sam Harris
Book: Waking Up
App: Waking Up
Eckhart Tolle
Book: Power of Now
Ep. 1 - Intro
In this first episode, we share a bit of our personal stories about leaving Christianity and the mystical experiences that accelerated our faith deconstruction. We talk about faith as belonging and the fear, sadness, and anger that can come when you lose that community and sense of identity as you deconstruct. Karen touches on what it's like to not fit the mold in a church community, and how it felt to be on the outside because she is married to an atheist.
Some of the other themes we hit on in this episode include:
- How we now understand the concept of "God" in this post-deconstruction space
- What we're learning about agnosticism and universal consciousness
- The kernels of truth in all religions, serving as breadcrumbs for the spiritual journey
- Anger in deconstruction - both at ourselves and the church
- Unknowing God and unknowing ourselves
- What things have kept us interested in spirituality?
- Dealing with the loss of key identities as "Christian"
Formative Teachers mentioned:
- Rupert Spira
- Eckhart Tolle
- Alan Watts
- Nisargadatta Maharaj
- NT Wright
- Richard Rohr
Contact