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Melrose Sheltering in Place

Melrose Sheltering in Place

By Nan Kirkpatrick
Join Nan and Christopher as we shelter together in Melrose Place.

When Melrose Place originally aired in 1992, Nan was a 13-year-old book nerd and Christopher was 18, traveling the world, footloose and fancy free. They both completely missed the cultural phenomenon that was Melrose Place. Now they're socially distancing in Texas and Washington, so what better time to discover some new friends, revisit their youths, and spend some time together (from a safe hundreds of miles apart).

This is...Melrose Sheltering in Place.
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Currently playing episode

Season 1, Ep 2: Bitches be clingy

Melrose Sheltering in Place

1x
S 2 Eps 28 - 30: The B**chy Stranger is Back in a G String
This week we FINALLY GET THE BIG KIMBERLY REVEAL and...it's a little underwhelming? Join Nan and Christopher for Melrose Sheltering in Place. 
01:13:55
March 20, 2021
S 2 Eps 25 - 27: In Bed with Two Psycho Mancinis
This time on Melrose Sheltering in Place...Allison's family is weird and probably bad, we don't know why BILLY AND ALLISON ARE GETTING MARRIED, Sydney and Michael are honestly made for each other, everyone is moving on up in their careers, Amanda is very clearly an oppressive boss but also there's a peeping Tom on the loose...and we finally get a big surprise we've been waiting for! Join us. 
01:17:08
March 6, 2021
S 2 Eps 22 - 24: Otherwise Engaged to a Ball and Chain, Mancini Style
Wondering why we're talking about the Super Bowl?! Because of many technical difficulties, this episode is getting posted more than 4 weeks since it as recorded. Oops. Anyway, welcome back to Melrose Sheltering in Place. It's been so long since we recorded this we can't remember what happened, so join us for the adventure of discovery. 
01:10:54
February 28, 2021
S 2 Eps 19-21: Swept Away by the Parting Glances of Young Seamen
Well it's another episode of Melrose Sheltering in Place, one of a multitude of Melrose Place Podcasts because what the eff else are we going to do with the rest of our lives? This week, no one, including Billy and Allison, can figure out why Billy and Allison are still together. We can't figure out how Andrew Shue is even still on this show. Someone puts a secret compartment in the most conspicuous place. And nothing says dating like blackmail! It's MELROSE PLACE!!!!
01:33:17
January 28, 2021
S 2 Eps 16 - 18: An Arousing Game of the Blues
Happy New Year! Meet the new boss, so far same as the old boss. Anyway, Nan and Christopher are back! This week at Melrose Place we have: scheming, infidelity, Don't Ask Don't Tell, a change of fortune, and a sailor who may or may not be a criminal. This show is actually getting watchable! 
01:21:55
January 13, 2021
Season 2 Episode 13 - 15: A Duet of Mistletoe Bedfellows
Happy Holidays! This episode of Melrose Sheltering in Place we talk about what a worthless POS Billy is, Allison's mom jeans and hella 90s hair that's growing by the second, and crying in the shower. Also, it's Christmas at Melrose Place.  Also, if you're last minute shopping for the Melrose Place lover in your life, may we suggest this lovely watercolor on Etsy? https://www.etsy.com/listing/892693852/melrose-tv-show-apt-building-watercolor
01:40:47
December 24, 2020
S 2 Eps 10 - 12: Cold Turkey on a Collision Course with a Tangled Web
This week we add a new feature to Melrose Sheltering in Place: JORTS CORNER! Wanna know what's happening in Jorts Corner? Guess you'll have to listen. We also talk about the fact that sex work is work, doctors should pull their hair back around open wounds, and wigs! Any day now we'll be as big as the Spin Doctors. 
01:17:48
December 6, 2020
S 2 Eps 7-9: Flirting with Marrying a Bed of Roses
Welcome back to Melrose Sheltering in Place. Things are really heating up around here: Michael is sleeping with Kimberly AND Sydney and mad that Jane is sleeping with Robert. Jane is sleeping with Robert but still sad about that ding dong Michael. That's our Jane. And Matt agrees to marry Katya so she can stay in the US but then resents her for it, while Billy is very silly as usual. Join us, won't you? 
01:28:60
November 26, 2020
S 2 Eps 4 - 6: Of Bikes and Ladies, AMIRITE?!
Well today is a historic day. We decided to celebrate Trump's defeat and the first woman of color vice president by recording a podcast talking about Melrose Place. We literally found out the results like 5 minutes before recording. Anyway, enough about us. This week we talk about the drinking problem that wasn't, lawyers in lust, and the battle of the sexes, 90s style. Join Nan and Christopher for another visit to Melrose Place. 
01:18:13
November 8, 2020
S 2 Eps 1-3: A Long Day's Journey Into Much Ado About Revenge
We're FINALLY AT SEASON TWO!!!!!! Ten minutes in and it's already much improved from season 1. Honestly, Hulu should just delete season 1 and call it the lost season, just like Drag Race. Anyway, join Nan and Christopher as we discuss the explosive first 3 episodes of season 2 of Melrose Place. 
01:05:45
October 24, 2020
A Very Special Unauthorized Melrose Place Story
As a reward for FINALLY finishing season 1, we're talking about The Unauthorized Melrose Place Story, a Lifetime movie from 2015 that tells the story of the first 3 seasons of Melrose Place in an hour-and-a-half. It's kind of like looking at an impressionist painting...or something. But you know who watches TV? THESE TWO HOT BABES. Join us, the hot babes, as we walk you through the one thing that might be stupider than Melrose Place Season 1. 
01:21:56
October 13, 2020
S 1 Episodes 17 - 32: THE MELROSE MEGA MIX!
Welp, we did it. We recorded a 2.5 hour episode about the entire second half of the first season of Melrose Place. If we can do it, you can do it. So grab some snacks, take a quick pee break, get in your comfy chair, and get ready to flash forward to season 2 with us. 
02:39:39
September 29, 2020
S 1 Ep 15: Are we there yet?
Heads up: Some slight technical difficulties this week. Very slight. But Nan is not a savvy enough editor to do much about it.  Anyhoo, this week we have a stock storyline featuring two characters we've never seen before and will never see again. Also, where's Matt? Plus, Nan has a big idea to put us out of our misery faster, and Christopher is into it. 
01:14:29
September 20, 2020
S 1 Ep 14: Sometimes boring is better?
This week, stuff happens but it feels like not much happens? Join Nan and Christopher as we continue to shelter in Melrose Place. Matt makes some progress on his lawsuit, we definitely get the feeling Michael is gonna cheat, Jane is weirdly philosophical but in a very Jane way, and Alison is all over the place. 
01:06:48
September 3, 2020
S 1 Ep 13: Matt Finally Gets A...oh.
Sandy gets herself off this sinking ship that is Melrose Place. Also, Matt finally gets his storyline from the storyline closet. 
01:00:36
August 24, 2020
S 1 Ep 12: This episode owes us
Can't get enough of your own student debt? Well here's a whole story arc dedicated to someone else's! 
01:24:26
August 4, 2020
S 1 Ep 11: Don't perform with dogs or children
Just know that at some point in the middle things go a little haywire but we get it back on track. Which is more than we can say for Melrose Place. Anyway, this time around, Billy and Allison have a very weird fight. All. Episode. Long. The inevitable finally happens: one seed is lost and another is planted. And don't get your friends dogs as surprise gifts! 
01:23:16
July 23, 2020
S 1 Ep 10: The One About Race
This week we have a very timely episode (of Melrose Place, the show we're watching -- stuck that in there for the search), full of awkward dialogue that was clearly written by white people. 
01:14:29
July 16, 2020
Season 1 Episode 9: Thing are slightly looking up around here
This week, Nan and Christopher talk for 5 minutes about our Lost Episode, which was really the universe doing y'all a favor. Then we talk about Responsibly Yours, possibly one of the best Melrose Place episodes yet. Which is really saying...something. 
55:42
July 5, 2020
S 1 Ep 7: Long day's journey into night.
Somehow this show is getting worse. If it were a patient of Dr. Mancini, it would be flatlining. But we use the time to get a little personal with you. Oh the horror. 
01:00:07
June 22, 2020
More like SNOOZE FEST
Join us for yet another week of making fun of Melrose Place, complete with Fuck 12 energy and a call to donate to bail funds. Also pardon the interruption in the middle -- someone had to poop. And by someone we mean Nan.  We are not the podcast for learning about the call to defund police and police and prison abolition, but some recommendations: Read literally anything by Angela Davis.  Check out the website for Critical Resistance.  Read The End of Policing by Alex Vitale.  Find a bail fund and give it money.  Check out the work of Mariame Kaba. 
01:11:41
June 14, 2020
Take the Plunge
This week we have an abortion storyline and the hot 90s craze of bungee jumping. Take the plunge with us. 
01:23:11
June 12, 2020
This would NEVER happen!
This shit is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S. 
01:28:52
May 24, 2020
Melrose Place is NOT Burning
Jane, for the love of god, get a life. 
01:28:12
May 16, 2020
Season 1, Ep 2: Bitches be clingy
This week, Nan and Christopher try not to bore you to death while talking to you about an episode of Melrose Place that bored them to death. Jane, get a hobby. PLEASE. 
01:13:09
May 10, 2020
This is the place...
Join Nan and Christopher as we shelter together in Melrose Place.  When Melrose Place originally aired in 1992, Nan was a 13-year-old book nerd and Christopher was 18, traveling the world, footloose and fancy free. They both completely missed the cultural phenomenon that was Melrose Place. Now they're socially distancing in Texas and Washington, so what better time to discover some new friends, revisit their youths, and spend some time together (from a safe hundreds of miles apart).  This is...Melrose Sheltering in Place. 
01:36:32
May 2, 2020