The Vault

#19 EXCLUSIVE! 'Lara Croft: Tomb Raider - Withhold The Secrets' FULL SCRIPT!

An episode of The Vault

By Vic and Jase
Is gaming and excessive idiotic rambling your thing? Then 'The Vault' is the podcast for you! Vic and Jase take an in-depth look at some of the greatest games ever their opinion. Oh, and the occasional, ahem, video game "movie".
More places to listen

More places to listen

#20 Testing Our Knowledge - The Mr. & Mrs. Quiz
It's the final episode of series two and what better way to say farewell, than an underwhelming quiz! This week, we are putting ourselves to the test to see how well we know each other. We've kept it gaming related, obvs. Tune in to find out who knows who better.  Whose team are you on? Let us know over on the @Vault_Unlocked on Twitter. Once again, we want to take this opportunity to thank you all for your continued support this series. Thank you for all of your downloads, listens and tweets, it means a lot to us! Don't forget to rate and subscribe to the podcast and listen to the previous episodes to tide you over to next year. We'll be back before you know it with all new episodes, guests and laughs-a-plenty!
September 6, 2019
#19 EXCLUSIVE! 'Lara Croft: Tomb Raider - Withhold The Secrets' FULL SCRIPT!
In the penultimate episode of series two, Vic has dug out an artefact of her own - the future Academy Award nominated blockbuster 'Lara Croft: Tomb Raider - Withhold The Secrets'. We take you on a full read through of the screenplay, along with casting and other exciting predictions. And, of course, we also have yet another grass update. Who would you cast? Let us know your picks on twitter @Vault_Unlocked! We hope you all enjoy this episode just as much as we did - it's a laugh and a half. Music:- 'Local Forecast' - Kevin MacLeod Record Scratch - SFX YouTube.
August 19, 2019
#18 'That's A Nice Photo!' - The MCM Manchester Comic Con 2019 Special
In the last episode, we talked our predictions for our upcoming trip to MCM Comic Con in Manchester. This week, we're diving into what happened at Manchester Central, who we met and what you lot could expect from attending in the future. Also, we have a grass update (which is what you're all tuning in for really), and the most stupid thing Vic's ever seen in a Cinema - EVER. Did you attend this year's MCR con? If so, what did you think? Let us know over on Twitter @Vault_Unlocked.
August 5, 2019
#17 'Bread & Grass' - You voted for more chat, we're sorry.
CAUTION - IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE C-BOMB, DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS EPISODE, HUNNIE XO. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. Anyhoo, you all voted yes to #TheVault switching things up and including a little more chat on the podcast, and by 'eck have we delivered...A LOAF OF BREAD. It's also story time on all things 'Moped C***', for those who asked to know the saga.  We're also talking about #MCMManchester and the excitement that the event will bring, blimmin' woop. There's a slither of gaming in this one, but not as much as usual. You asked for it, you only have yourselves to blame. Do you have any annoying stories you'd like to share regarding your area? How about your favourite type of bread? We'd love to know. Please do send us a lengthy and well-penned email to Alternatively, you can send us your grammar-free grievances over on twitter, @Vault_Unlocked. We love to hear from you, so please, we beg of you, talk to us. Kindest regards, Vic & Jase.
July 22, 2019
#16 'There's Been A Murder...' - The 'Murdered: Soul Suspect' Special
We're back after a massive hiatus (soz about us, thanks for sticking around), and this week we're talking about Airtight Games's #MurderedSoulSuspect. As per, it's spoiler central once again, but we have left some things for you all to find yourselves. Also, the ending hasn't been unearthed, so you'll have to work out who the Bell Killer is with our Ronan. No, not Keating, O'Connor's the name and slaying demons is his game. IMAGINE if it was Ronan Keating - BARE HILAR. Anyhoo - please let us know what you thought of the game over on @Vault_Unlocked on Twitter, or you can email us at, to fill our dusty inbox.
July 19, 2019
#15 'What If?' - A Dev For A Day
In this week's episode, we're getting all hypothetical on you and pretending that we have the dreamy job of coming up with the concept for a brand-spankin' new game. Fun times all round - well, kind of, being as the subject matter can be serious within said plots - but hey, we're wanting to make you feel a myriad of emotions, so step off yeah?! What would your ideal game be? Are you the star in your own masterpiece? Let us know by tweeting us at @Vault_Unlocked or pinging us a lovely little email at
June 3, 2019
#14 'I've Got A Problem, Mike...' - The Until Dawn Special
It's another long episode today as we dig Supermassive's 'Until Dawn' out of the vault, for a good, in-depth and slightly hap-hazard review. Obviously, it's a good opportunity for Vic to talk about imaginary husband #8774 and Oscar winner Rami Malek, and Jase to perform his #8774th eye roll. We also have an unexpected guest on the podcast today, the ever popular Mr. Annoying Angle Grinder, apols about him hun x Let us know what you thought of 'Until Dawn', by giving us a tweet 'Vault_Unlocked' or emailing us at and as always, thanks for listening.
May 20, 2019
#13 Vault Theatre - Tomb Raider 2013 Film Review
In the light of news to a sequel of the 2018 release, we're casually reviewing 'Tomb Raider' starring Alicia Vikander this week, as part of another feature on the podcast. As a couple of die-hard Tomb Raider fans, we've got a few things to say, so tune in to find out if we think it's a flop or not. As always, catch us on the socials on Twitter, @Vault_Unlocked and let us know your thoughts on the film.
May 6, 2019
#12 To Play Or Not To Play? That Is The Question...
We're offering two games on a proverbial silver platter each in episode twelve. Vic's serving up 'Theme Hospital' and 'Hotel Dusk: Room 215' for Nintendo DS  and Jason is offering a course of Telltale's 'The Walking Dead', followed by a sweet of 'Fallout 4'.  All of this is in hope that we will enjoy each other's picks this week and open our minds to some new games. Have a listen to see what we thought of the choices. As always, we love to hear from you, so give us a tweet at @Vault_Unlocked and let us know your top game of the moment.
April 22, 2019
#11 A Reignited Ramble
In this episode, everyone's favourite purple dragon is the topic of today. We're also celebrating Vic's first EVER platinum trophy - and in true Vic style, it's a bigger deal than it should be. What did you lovely lot think of the Spyro Reignited Trilogy? Let us know over on Twitter @Vault_Unlocked. Music: Camina Burana - Carl Orff Links -  Vic- Instagram - bubblegumstitchesxo Twitter - @BGstitches Jason- Instagram - @jpc_artwork Twitter - @jches16
April 8, 2019
#10 Vault VR - Beats, Bots and Crystal People
Do you want to dance like Darth Vader? Do you want to ruin a kitchen like a flappy Gordon Ramsey fan? Do you want to BE IN THE MATRIX?!? Well you can’t. But you CAN in VR! Blimmin’ woo. In episode ten, we’ve got another slap-dash, yet insightful half-hour for you, all about Beat Saber, Job Simulator and Super Hot, so get your lug holes ready for some rambling. Did you enjoy these games?! Let us know your thoughts by tweeting us @Vault_Unlocked.
March 25, 2019
#9 Playstation Classic - The Casual Review
The mini box of joy and confusion is a topic we're getting our laughing gear around in episode nine. A small disclaimer - Vic's got some very, ahem, strong opinions on 'Jumping Flash', if you're a fan, we'd suggest perhaps skipping this one. But just hit play anyway 'cause we're needy and like to know you're there. What games did you want to see on the Classic? Give us a little tweet @Vault_Unlocked and let us know.
March 11, 2019
#8 Baxter's Top Three - A Chat With Daryl Baxter
We're delving into the mind of our good friend Daryl Baxter in episode eight involving his top three games. What will he pick?! Tune in to find out.  As always you can tweet us @Vault_Unlocked and let us know your top three picks. Also, many apols for the audio in this episode - our equipment was clearly having an 'off day'. Daryl is a freelance writer and runs two podcasts of his own, 'The Outpost Show' and 'PAL Keys'. Follow the links below to listen and to check out his website. The Outpost Show - PAL Keys -
February 25, 2019
#7 The Vault Valentine's Day Spesh Sesh
We're back with series two and we're kicking things off with a Valentine's Day Special! In episode seven, we're talking about the best and the worst romantic moments in some of the games we've played. Do what's right and spend the most 'romantic' night of the year with us - you know you want to...please? We've also gone and made ourselves a new twitter account - follow and tweet us @Vault_Unlocked. Let us know whether you agree with us or not, just talk to us. PLEASE.
February 14, 2019
#6 SYPS - Sh*t Your Pants Scary! A Halloween Special
Spoilers ahead! In episode six, we're talking about the games we'd love to play if we weren't such wet flannels. 'Cause scary. We're on a little hiatus now until the new year, but don't worry - we'll be back in 2019 with some absolute howlers, as per. What games would you like to play that brings the scare factor? Let us know over on Twitter @The_Phease and @jches16! Music:- Vault Effect - HQSFX YouTube The Library - Resident Evil 2 - Masami Ueda
October 29, 2018
#5.5 The Dark Angel Symphony - A Kickstarter Project
In this little mini-episode, we sit you down and inform you all about Peter Connelly's 'Tomb Raider : The Dark Angel' Kickstarter! The main goal is to get this recorded with a FULL orchestra to hear his soundtracks to 'The Last Revelation', 'Chronicles' and 'The Angel Of Darkness' remade and remastered in full glory. By gum, are we excited! Make sure to pledge now over on Kickstarter and search 'The Dark Angel Symphony', please pledge what you can! Lara will love you for it! Music:- Vault Effect - HQSFX YouTube 'Jeep Thrills' - Peter Connelly 'The Angel Of Darkeness Theme' - Peter Connelly
October 22, 2018
#5 'That Nostalgia, Tho... SUL SUL!' - The Sims Extravaganza
We're cranking out the CD-Roms and we're brushing up on our Simlish for episode 5! We're taking it all the way back to 2000 and chatting all things 'The Sims', from way back when to present day. Have any sadistic confessions* you'd like to share with us over on Twitter? Tweet us @The_Phease and @jches16, we want to hear what crazy stories you may have for us. *Sims related confessions only, please. We cannot be held reliable or accountable for any petty crimes and/or murders you may have committed in the real world. Especially 'cause that's rather awful of you. I mean, really. There's no need. AT ALL. Be nice. Music:- Vault Effect - HQSFX YouTube 'Glabe Glarn (Neural Net Processor MegaMix)' - 4Ever-N-Ever/Jerry Martin 'BoSIM Nova' - Marc Russo
October 15, 2018
#4 Vault VR - Bears, Bombs & Heists
In our newest segment of the podcast, we chat about the Playstation VR and three of the first games we'd ever played with a plastic box on our bonces. The games featured in our first Vault VR episode are: The London Heist, from VR Worlds, Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes and Sneaky Bears. How did you find these gems? Have you played them yet? Have you 'accidentally' punched someone in real life whilst enveloped by the the immersive realm of VR? Vic has, well, that's what she told Jase anyway... Let us know on Twitter @The_Phease and @jches16 - are you the pelter or the peltee? Music:- Vault Effect - HQSFX YouTube 'To Be Frank' - Joe Thwaites
October 1, 2018
#3 'Let's get ready to RAMBLE!'-Detroit:Become Human Edition
We're talking all things Detroit: Become Human in episode three. It goes without saying that major spoilers lie ahead, but if you're destination is Spoiler Town, SpoilerVille, just west of Ruined It For Myself BLVD, then strap in, pals. And maybe grab a cuppa, 'cause it's a long 'un. What did YOU think of Detroit: Become Human? Let us know over on Twitter @The_Phease and @jches16! Music:- Vault Effect - HQSFX YouTube 'Connor Main Theme (Connor)' - Nima Fakhrara
September 17, 2018
#2 Talking The Classics... The ones we'd like remastered.
In episode two, we talk about a few games of yesteryear that we'd love to see revitalised. Let's just say Vic's picks are a little, ahem... NICHE. Agree with any of our picks? Let us know on twitter! Send your potential grievances to @The_Phease and @jches16. Music:- Vault Effect - HQSFX YouTube 'Pop Record 2YN' - Flesh Hammer - VG Junk YouTube
September 2, 2018
#1 - UNCHARTED: Fan Film
We've only gone and started a podcast, haven't we?! In this first episode, we take a very excited look at Allan Ungar's UNCHARTED Fan Film - with a bit of Nathan Fillion love thrown in too, obviously. #FillionFanclub #Filetmignon Let us know what you thought of the podcast or what games you'd like us to play over on Twitter! Follow us at @The_Phease and @jches16. Music:- Vault Effect - HQSFX YouTube 'Nate's Theme 3.0' - Greg Edmonson
July 22, 2018
Make your own podcast for free with Anchor!