What she craves

Watching two friends try to play rescuer in all their relationships - made me come up with a simple (mocking) reminder, of how playing rescuer is unhealthy - not just because you are treating your partner like a helpless puppy, but you are trying to get love by forcing someone else to change - and why they often didn't ask for it, don't want it
Remember when someone is playing the victim it does NOT mean that they actually want a solution - sometimes they just want attention
#playingvictim #rescuers #enablers #saveyourself #boundaries

how resentment destroys intimacy when acts of service aren't reciprocated - and how to make her feel appreciated -
The expression, "Happy wife, happy life" - does NOT mean buy her things but behave like you don't care
.... it means ASK what makes her feel loved, ASK if she wants help - ESP if you both work
and do not expect your partner to mother you .... so you get affection because SHE feels loved and wants to return it.

what is the love language of your partner? and how do you make them feel loved? (often we show love in the way we feel loved, and forget that their love language might be different)

#fivelovelanguages #whatmakesmensexy #domesticbliss #helpheraroundthehouse
NOTE - some mention of acts of intimacy between couples - in context of where it breaks down

BFO Life Skills Rant
aggressive drivers must be just as inconsiderate and selfish in bed - and other ways we spot this behaviour

Why are people aggressive? why do we enable it? what we really think when they brag about intimidating a stranger

Mild coarse language, use of the "F" word

why nasty people actually create their own karma - of seeing the world through hateful eyes - and a spatial technique for feeling the warning signs in your body
(sorry about the sound quality, i was at the beach with the dog, and created this for a client on the fly)

explicit - mild - Ask women what they want in bed -
because if you give her orgasms, she willl want more sex AND
she will try more things - it's a win/win
(examples used are hetero couples)
WHY she eats a small meal at an expensive restaurant (Trust me, DO NOT complain)

how to spot the difference - why men who tell you they are "nice guys" seldom are - how we know we can trust you - and why we ask about the ex and listen to if you bitch

Green Relationship flags - https://scoopempire.com/green-flags-spotted-what-it-feels-like-being-in-a-healthy-relationship/

Brief description of why i created this, and how men are lonely and unsure of what women are looking for post #MeToo

Upheaval is coming - whether the old boys' club likes it or not - the old system is crashing down -
and those who previously had no rights, no education, no visibility... suddenly have a voice

#incels #trolls #patriarchy #change #veganism #climatechange

if i see you be super aggressive on the road - screaming rage and demanding to be let through and get to the "destination" first -
I will assume you're not only just as aggressive and inconsiderate in LIFE - but that you're like that in bed

eg - how people drive, how people play games - is a clue to other red flags

 the things I've learned the hard way about
- gaslighting
- red flags
- walking on eggshells
- blame & justification
- the way the victim tries to rescue
- the delusion that loving them will heal them
and why you don't help them by trying to appease them

(this was a triggering topic for me to speak about - sorry that i struggled and rambled)

lighthouse technique 

Bottling up pain never ends well - for your body, or your relationships
And often we assume others have the same values as us - and get angry when they don't
But..... underneath the anger.. it is usually pain - or a painful belief
#LoveLanguages #narcissism #boundaries 

brain integration and muscle testing techniques as an alternative to chemically restore harmonious levels of dopamine and serotonin

Rich Roll & AJ podcast - https://www.richroll.com/podcast/chef-aj-363/
fen phen wiki page - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fenfluramine/phentermine
#fenphen #dopamine #gluten #foodaddiction 

how can we unlearn the pattern of rescuer and why it starts - 

what happens when the earth energy is intense - we have to adjust - some people go into resilience and try to push through it
some go into shutdown and overwhelm - and can spiral into addiction
Whenever a loved one feels that something is "too hard" to deal with - it means that it has to be dealt with another way or by another person
eg - if they deal with their anger by shoving it down with cigarettes and whiskey - it will come out in disease
if you deal with your financial problems by ignoring them - then your partner or your bank will have to deal with it

This is also a time of shift in awareness for those who have played "rescuer"
Just like the old paradigm of the "abuser" is no longer infallible - the "rescuer" is no longer viable.. either

sorry - the volume is super loud - def turn it down
all of our stories are bullshit at their core - esp if they hurt us - reflect and reframe
and it will change and heal old triggers

Steven's mission to empower, not enable - and teach others to save themselves

some people have a problem for every solution - and, other than avoid them completely - can you use them to create arguments and resolve your own issue as you defend yourself from their negativity?!?

how we react to the meanings we create and attach to our memories