Exploring the way we relate, date, and communicate. What does it mean to be a human being in the 21st Century? Grab a cup of tea (or wine) and join us as we explore relationships, friendships, family, workplaces, societies, sex, and our relationships with nature, technology, and ourselves. We'll look through several lenses - psychology, sociology, maybe even physics or biology - and invite experts on social connection (in other words, pretty much anybody who has interacted with other people in their lives).
Where to listen
Compatibility Part 1: The never-ending search for "the One"
Emily Nagoski is the award-winning author of the New York Times bestseller, Come As You Are: the surprising new science that will transform your sex life and The Come As You Are Workbook, and co-author, with her sister Amelia, of Burnout: the secret to unlocking the stress cycle. She began her work as a sex educator at the University of Delaware, where volunteered as a peer sex educator while studying psychology with minors in cognitive science and philosophy. She went on to earn a M.S. in Counseling and a Ph.D. in Health Behavior, both from Indiana University, with clinical and research training at the Kinsey Institute. Now she combines sex education and stress education to teach women to live with confidence and joy inside their bodies.
In this beautiful interview, we talk desire, arousal, stress, Dual Systems theory, and all things sexually "normal" and otherwise. Is the secret to good sex desire, or closeness? What about those people who claim we need to maintain healthy 'distance' in order to create mystery, which in turn fuels desire? How can stress kill our sex drive? How has Patriarchal thinking destroyed the way we relate to our own, and each other's, bodies? Why are we more likely to have an orgasm if we're wearing socks?
How can somebody go from being cheated on, to being non-monogamous? What is Relationship Anarchy? And what do you do when you realise that society's ideas and expectations surrounding relationships don't make sense to you?
Kira Williams (they/them) is a genderqueer trans woman, a critical human geographer and a post-doctoral fellow at the University of Waterloo in Canada. Their research focuses on international migration, political geography and analytical methodology.
In this episode, we explore ideas of relationship norms, what it's like when you don't subscribe to society's ideas about romantic relationships, and how Kira's relationship with a woman who cheated on them led them to realise they were non-monogamous. This episode originally intended to look into why people cheat, but instead took me down a completely different road - why don't some people cheat? What keeps people monogamous? And what about those who don't conform to those expectations?